I Love That Obama Is on Medium, But…

Photo by Library of Congress on Unsplash

I wish that he would write more unhinged stuff.

He’s not even the president anymore and he writes more presidential than our actual president!

I want him to let loose.

(And no sneaky stuff like letting Keegan-Michael Key do it for you!)

I want to hear what he actually thinks about Trump. Not the polished, speech-ready version. Like the happy hour with friends version.

I want a rant about silly stuff. One of my favorite things is when people are very opinionated about how food should be. He must have opinions about food!

He also must have a fun boner story! I feel like every guy has a fun unfortunately-timed boner story.

What’s being president like? Very obvious thing he could write about that I have not seen. Like is the bed comfy? Is it weird to sleep where you know other presidents have slept? Is the bathtub that Taft got stuck in still there?

Also is it a big letdown not being president now? Or a relief as long as you ignore who took your place?

He was on Comedians in Cars getting Coffee. He has a sense of humor. He could do a listicle.

Did you have a fallback career if president did not work out?

Was he scared of being assassinated? That would freak me out. Like if I ever got elected I might be the first gay and/or first woman. People would hate me!

What’s up with Biden?

How much do Hillary and Bill hate each other? But also can you imagine either of them being on the dating scene again?!

I want a rant about how the whole (or half I guess?) country loves Michelle, but boy is she not fun to be married to.