Do I subconsciously hold a negative image of Rich People which is sabotaging me?

I want financial freedom. I want to retire earlier than the current age stated by the State. I want to be wealthy enough to create the impact I dream about — supporting entrepreneurs to scare and create employment opportunities, building things that matter. I want assets to pass on to my children.

But sometimes I think my own mindset stands in my way.

I have come to notice something about myself: When I’m about to do something that brings in money — especially sales — I find something else to do instead. I’ll work on product development. I’ll write. I’ll research. Anything but the thing that actually generates revenue.

And I have been really thinking about why I do this, reflecting on my money mindset, trying to understand where this comes from.

When I was young, whenever we saw a rich person and asked what they did, the answer was usually “they’re a businessman” — often spoken with shady undertones. Like being rich meant you’d done something questionable to get there. Like wealth and integrity couldn’t coexist.

I also grew up Christian, going to church regularly. You’d hear about how it’s easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter heaven. Or that true riches are in heaven, not on earth. The message, subtle but persistent, was that focusing on earthly wealth was somehow… less spiritual. Less good.

I’m not a practicing Christian anymore. But I’m realizing that some of those teachings stay with you subconsciously. They shape how you see money and wealthy people, even when you think you’ve moved past them.

I have also come to understand these teachings in their context now. They were warnings against greed, against valuing money over people, against losing your values in pursuit of wealth.

But somewhere along the way, I think I absorbed a different message: that being rich itself is problematic. That wanting wealth is suspect. That good people don’t focus on money.

And now here I am, wanting to do so much good that requires money, but subconsciously avoiding the activities that would actually generate it.

I haven’t met enough wealthy people in real life who would challenge this image I absorbed as a child. People who are both wealthy and generous, both rich and ethical, both successful financially and making a positive impact.

I know they exist. I read about them, listen to them in podcasts. But I haven’t personally encountered them in a way that rewrites my subconscious associations.

And honestly, it’s difficult to find these examples in Finland. Wealth here is often quiet, private. The lists of wealthy people exist, but I don’t personally know anyone on them. So my childhood image — “businessman” said with those shady undertones — I am afraid might still be the default picture in my head.

I’m trying to work on this. Trying to build new associations. Trying to see wealth as a tool for impact rather than evidence of moral compromise. Still noticing when I avoid sales or revenue-generating activities and asking myself why. Still trying to separate wanting financial freedom from the subconscious guilt that comes with it.

Do you think our childhood beliefs about money shape us more than we realize? Have you noticed ways your own money mindset holds you back?

If you have good communities and spaces to recommend, please do :)

Follow for weekly exploration on Actualizing one’s potential!