Trump Staged Another Fake Assassination Attempt

He thinks we’re stupid enough to believe it was real

Photo by Scott Szarapka on Unsplash

Oh, come on. We’re not that stupid. Last night’s assassination attempt was blatantly staged to get Trump out of various messes that he has gotten himself into.

Ya know, I have to admit that I actually thought that the assassination attempt at the 2024 rally in Butler, PA was real. My theory was that the Secret Service was involved because they basically allowed it to happen. You can read my article here.

But then the internet talking heads … not the mainstream media, of course … pointed out that there was no scar on Trump’s ear. In fact, there should have been a chunk missing because cartilage doesn’t regenerate. But there isn’t a mark.

And then I went back and re-watched the footage and verified something that had been bothering me. That is, that as soon as the first shot was heard, Trump ducked behind his lectern.

See, most people, when they hear a gunshot, instinctively look around to see what the noise is and where it is coming from. Then they duck. Trump ducked immediately because he had been told to before he went onstage. And then there was the fake blood and the wonky blood trail and it dawned on me that the whole thing was fake.

My suspicions were confirmed by the second fake assassination attempt. Come on, hiding in a hedge with a rifle? That’s the kind of shit you see on TV. It doesn’t happen in real life.

And why was another assassination attempt staged? To make the first one look like it was real. That people really were trying to kill Trump.

Which brings us to last night. Trump had a problem. Several problems, but the solution to his immediate problem, the correspondents’ dinner nicely took care of a few other problems.

So, what was Trump to do about the dinner? He didn’t want to be roasted. He cannot tolerate criticism even in jest. He has no sense of humor. And he couldn’t give a speech denouncing the press because that would look silly attending a dinner celebrating something he despised. And it would open him up to literally days of roasting online.

And if he gave his “remarks” and then left, that would make him look like he was running away. He couldn’t back out of the dinner because that would make him look weak.

What to do, what to do. Oh, I know, how about an emergency of some sort to stop the dinner? Power outage? Bomb scare? What about another assassination attempt? Yeah, let’s pretend that Trump’s life is in danger.

His approval rating is in the shitter. An attempt on his life is always popular with his supporters and could raise his approval rating.

Gas prices too high? Who cares? They’re trying to kill Trump!

Food prices too high? Who cares? They’re trying to kill Trump!

Housing costs too high? Who cares? They’re trying to kill Trump!

Can’t find a job? Who cares? They’re trying to kill Trump!

And who cares about Jeffrey Epstein if people are shooting at Trump? And the Iranian clusterfuck! That would drop out of the news completely. Hell, you could always blame Iran, saying they were trying to kill Trump to stop the war.

And the ballroom! If people are shooting at Trump, that new and improved bunker under the ballroom is absolutely necessary.

While we’re on the subject, can someone explain to me how a bullet-proof, drone-proof, bomb-proof bunker on the White House grounds could have kept Trump safe at a dinner at a local hotel?

Asking for a friend.

Yeah, that assassination attempt was totally staged. It was way too convenient. And totally lame. An assassin bent on killing Trump rushes security at an event carrying a shotgun, a pistol and a knife, trying to enter the back of an enormous event space with the intention of running all the way to the front to kill Trump.

Cuz he has to run all the way up. None of his weapons are long range. All of them require being up close and personal to the target to hit and kill anything.

And who plans an assassination at an indoor event where the security will be tighter than a gnat’s ass?

One internet talking head suggested that the target was actually members of the media. I don’t buy that. Someone planning on taking out large numbers of people would be using an assault rifle. Something that can spew a lot of bullets and kill a lot of people in a short period of time.

Did they honestly think that this guy was going to go from table to table blasting people with his shotgun? Only in the movies.

Totally staged. Nobody was supposed to get hurt. But somebody blew it and didn’t kill the gunman. That’s key to these staged assassinations. The gunman has to die before they can be questioned and admit that they were hired to do it. My prediction is that this guy is going to die in custody, either from some “medical issue” or by “suicide.”

My guess is this is the last fake assassination attempt that we are going to see. Trump isn’t up to the escape part. Didja see him fall as they hustled him off the dais? He’s so unsteady on his feet that he can’t move faster than a slow shuffle. The Secret Service had to lift him back on to his feet to complete the (slow) hustle off the dais.

He’s getting too heavy to be lifted, even by multiple people. And he’s too slow to be quickly evacuated. They’re gonna have to come up with alternatives to fake assassination attempts.

Of course, if the Grim Reaper would just do his damn job, no one would have to worry about any of this.