The Joy of Missing Out

Photo by Mohammad Alizade on Unsplash

It sucks to know that I must do weekly, even monthly, update some of the apps and software on my phone. If I don’t do the updates, not only can’t I enjoy things but it also prevents me from doing my job.

So, I’ve been practicing to be as outdated as possible for a couple of times. I have come to a realization that too many strings are connected within me.

I couldn’t fathom how would I reach a certain level of happiness and tranquility if I’m attached doing the same thing for gaining fun and relaxation — scrolling, dump posting, commenting, viewing stories — like 5.66 billion social media users out there.

This is my counter-narrative to the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO): The Joy of Missing Out (JOMO).

I have a confession. It all started with my concern about always seeing and knowing about the lives of people who seemed so perfect. For years, I was lulled by the perfection on social media to the point where I felt, to some extent, left behind, not doing anything, or even feeling unfair because my life was not yet ideal.

But when you think about it, that’s just how social media is: it’s for showing off.

Regardless of whether people show off for validation from others or just for fun, our perceptions become difficult to change when their photos/videos/reels/ seem to perfectly depicts an ideal life. Therefore starting in 2023, I have tried several times to disconnect from social media, especially Instagram. And now, in January 2026, I am trying again.

I was giggling when I made an announcement to my followers I won’t be availabe for the next few months. Some of them DM’d the same thing, “Hope everything is okay.” Then I was like, “What?! I’m fine, I swear.” But out of respect, maybe they really do care about my wellbeing. It just tickled me to know that a person’s wellbeing can be measured by whether or not they are active on social media (for those of you who read this here, thanks! And for the unanswered DMs, I’m so sorry. Now you got the answer :D).

Now I am trying to make a fresh start. If my life used to be full of conversation and laughter, now I try to enjoy sitting quietly while watching movies, walking alone every morning when the weather is nice, and doing my job as best as I can.

Frankly, so far, so good. It turns out that being far from the hustle and bustle is very much needed in this noisy world.

It is necessary for us not only to “move on with life” — to shift from one point in life to another — but also to “move in.”

Moving in means stopping for a moment and listening to yourself. Instead of pushing feelings away, I allow them to stay. I sit with my own fear or my own confusion, and I let them speak. There is no hurry. It’s not that I’m weak for feeling this way. I am simply a human.

When I try to move in, I learn who am I really are. I start to understand why something bothers me and what I truly need. I start to hear the voice within me and become softer when they are heard.

Slowly, I feel calmer and more honest with myself. From this place, I can grow in a natural way. Then, when I am ready, moving on happens by itself. I’m not chasing others anymore. I’m walking forward with awareness, grounded in myself, and less controlled by the noise on the screen. It is walking forward with kindness, carrying out things with care instead of fear of not following the mainstream.