Tuesday in Its Natural Habitat

Sure Happy It’s Tuesday.

When You Finally Stop Waiting for Life to Start

Photo by Pascal Bernardon on Unsplash

One of the hidden privileges of retirement.

When you’re working, Tuesday is often just Monday’s less attractive cousin. Not close enough to Friday to be encouraging, and too far from the weekend to inspire hope.

Then you retire, and one day somebody asks, “What are your plans for Tuesday?”

And the answer is, “I intend to observe Tuesday in its natural habitat.”

Tuesday becomes a perfectly respectable day. Not a stepping stone to something else. Just Tuesday, minding its own business.

I suspect age does something similar. When we’re young, every year is supposed to lead somewhere. Career. Marriage. Children. Success. Recognition.

Then one day you’re in your eighties, drinking coffee, scratching your beard, wondering what David Bowie meant by a lyric, and contemplating why you survived when others didn’t.

The day itself becomes enough.

A lot of people spend their lives trying to arrive. You have reached the stage where you can sit on the porch of existence and watch the traffic go by.

And if Tuesday shows up?

Well, Tuesday is welcome too. It didn’t do anything wrong. 😊

The Beatles gave Tuesday a memorable mention in Lady Madonna by The Beatles:

“Tuesday afternoon is never ending…”

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The song follows a hardworking mother trying to make it through the week while raising children and managing a household. Each day brings another challenge. Tuesday isn’t portrayed as exciting or romantic. It feels long, ordinary, and exhausting.

For many working people, that line rings true. Tuesday can seem to stretch forever.

Of course, for a retired Texan drinking coffee and contemplating the mysteries of survival, Tuesday afternoon may be exactly the right length. It gives a fellow time to wonder why he’s still here, what the Beatles knew about Tuesday, and whether there are any leftover pickles in the refrigerator.

The initials of “Sure Happy It’s Tuesday” are awkward.

Which may explain why it has not yet become a widely adopted greeting card slogan.

“Good morning, Sam! Sure Happy It’s Tuesday!”

“Uh… thanks?”

You may have accidentally discovered the world’s most backhanded celebration of Tuesday.

Bless its heart.

Now that’s the proper boy howdy response.

“Sure Happy It’s Tuesday.”

“Well, bless its heart.”

In Texas, “bless its heart” is one of the most versatile phrases ever invented. It can mean:

That’s sweet.

That’s pitiful.

That’s ridiculous.

That’s hopeless.

That’s adorable.

That poor fool doesn’t know any better.

Sometimes all six at once.

So when someone proudly unveils the acronym S.H.I.T. as a cheerful Tuesday slogan, the appropriate response is not criticism. It is simply:

“Well, bless its heart.”

A phrase carrying just enough kindness to soften the blow and just enough ambiguity to leave everyone wondering what you meant.

The South has elevated understatement into a fine art. And Tuesday, bless its heart, keeps showing up every week whether anybody asked for it or not.

Photo by Spencer Davis on Unsplash

If you’ve worked with addiction or lived through it, I’d be glad to hear what you’ve learned.

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Sam D. Parker is a retired drug rehab counselor communicating the value of increased awareness of addiction, planting, nourishing, and cultivating ideas, images, and emotions about the effect of addictive conditions on the human mind. He is a member of the Baha’i Faith.

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