This Man Tried To Pay His Bus Fare with a Cigarette Pack

It’s about half-past ten in the evening when I get to the Khoja Bus Stage. I manage to find just the last Matatu (Usually, by 10 pm the last Matatu for my route has left or is leaving the stage).

There are four people already seated in the Matatu. I pick an “aisle” seat on the second row from the back, the only seat that will accommodate my long legs. Soon I’m lost on Twitter on my phone as I wait for the Matatu to fill up.

In about 10 minutes the Matatu is full and we are well on our way towards Kirawa Road. From Khoja, we use the overpass above Globe roundabout, turn left onto Ngara Road, through Taarifa Road to Parklands Road and then onto Peponi Road. Kirawa Road begins where Peponi Road ends.

When we get to Ngara Road, the conductor begins asking for the fares. I look up to hand over the cash and immediately refocus on my phone. Just then, I become aware of someone’s hand from the backbench trying to give what I assume is money to the conductor. The conductor is not taking it though and this is why a few passengers and I begin to take notice. This hand belongs to a man and no, it’s not holding money. The man is handing over what looks like a cigarette packet, and an empty one at that. This must be a mistake, I tell myself; one of those times when you dive into your pockets and mistakenly fish out what you think is a banknote, right? Wrong.

The man is not going back to his pockets to get out his bus fare. He is still holding out the packet. He knows what he’s doing. A few of us passengers exchange looks and burst out laughing. What’s going on here? The Conductor is not laughing though, not at all. He has this look of disbelief and rising anger on his face. By now, it’s also clear that the man is very, very drunk. “Wacha mchezo, lipa gari wewe! (Stop joking, pay your fare!), the conductor shouts at the man. The man only stretches his hand further with the cigarette packet.

Normally, if a passenger doesn’t have fare in a Matatu they are forced to alight. The conductor doesn’t ask the driver to stop though. I suppose he’s concerned it’s late at night and the man is drunk. Also, the man probably has the cash and is simply hoping to ride for free. Frustrated, he turns around on his seat muttering. We are now on Parklands Road and we ride in silence for the time being.

Somewhere along Peponi Road, the conductor gives it another try. The man gets into his pocket and brings out his cig packet, again. The conductor is beyond pissed. “Nini mbaya na wewe?! (What is wrong with you?!), he asks the drunk passenger. “Hakuna gari ya bure! (There is no vehicle for free!), he adds. A short while later he says shaking his head from side to side, “Unataka kulipa gari na bangi?!” (You want to pay your fare with weed?!”). It’s clear now that he’s given up on getting his money.

As fate would have it, when we finally get to Kirawa Road, our non-paying passenger is the first to request to alight. All eyes fall on our conductor, to see what he’ll do. He doesn’t even behave like he heard that request. The man repeats his request, louder. This time the conductor asks the driver to keep going. This is how he’ll punish him, we realize. Even when other passengers begin to alight, the conductor blocks the entrance so the man can’t get off.

When I get off, the man is still onboard. There is just about half a Kilometer left to the last stop. I think that the man had to trek back on foot to his to stop, a distance of about two kilometers.

Now, this is one of those things that leave me with mixed feelings. On the one hand, one shouldn’t board a Matatu without fare. And to give an empty packet? But what if you really don’t have it? (Maybe don’t go out drinking in the first place?) Also, should we have paid it for him?

All in all, this was one entertaining Matatu ride!