Failure is the Original Learning Tool: Here’s How to Use It Well

Lessons From Hot Stoves and Other Bad Ideas

Photo by Peter Dlhy on Unsplash

A baby stands up.

Wobbles.

Takes one heroic step.

Falls back right flat on its diaper.

Guess what?

The baby doesn’t go back to take another theoretical course about walking. It also doesn’t call a meeting. It doesn’t update its strategy deck. It certainly doesn’t conclude that walking isn’t for it…

Instead, it gets up and tries again.

And again. And again.

For months, babies run one of the most intensive learning experiments humans ever conduct in their lives.

They fall thousands of times, constantly making tiny adjustments. Lean a little less. Balance a little more. Move one foot before the other. Until one day, without really realizing it, they’re walking!

Yes, it’s just a tiny step for humanity,

…but it’s one hell of a big step for each and everyone of us!

It’s one of life’s first and most important lessons.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you learn!

Learning happens through mistakes.

Parents understand this. That’s why they spend years warning children about all kinds of dangers — to make them learn faster.

• “Don’t touch the hot stove.”
• “Don’t run into the street.”
• “Don’t climb that shelf.”

Many children listen. Most children nod.

But few children truly understand.

Then one day, curiosity wins.

A tiny finger reaches toward the stove.

Touch. “Ouch!”

And suddenly: The lesson sticks forever.

There’s a big difference between hearing and experiencing.

Learning by listening is useful. Learning by doing is unforgettable.

This is essentially the foundation of science itself.

Scientists form hypotheses, run experiments, collect evidence, and adjust their understanding based on the results.

A fancy term for this is empirical evidence.

In simpler terms: Try something. See what happens. Learn from it.

Repeat.

The world advances because people are willing to test ideas and discover what works and what doesn’t.

But there’s an even more powerful lesson hidden here.

While personal experience is valuable, progress accelerates when we learn from the experiments others have already conducted.

After all, we don’t all need to reinvent the wheel.

Imagine if every generation had to rediscover fire, invent agriculture, figure out electricity, and learn from scratch that touching hot stoves is a bad idea.

Human civilization would move at the speed of a confused toddler.

Instead, we inherit lessons from those who came before us.

• Some paid for those lessons with time.
• Some with embarrassment.
• Some with their lives.
• Some with money.

Most often, a price has been paid already and for me, this is as good as free money lying right there on the street…

The smartest people learn from all of them!

1. Learn From Your Own Mistakes

As we just lined out, mistakes are inevitable. In fact, they’re often a sign you’re doing something worthwhile.

• Entrepreneurs launch projects.
• Investors make decisions.
• Curious people test ideas.
• Writers publish articles.

None of them get everything right.

Every meaningful pursuit comes with uncertainty.

I say this again: Sometimes you win. Sometimes you learn.

The key is making sure every mistake pays tuition.

Consider someone learning to ride a bicycle.

The first attempt is usually a spectacular demonstration of gravity.

They wobble. They overcorrect. They crash into a bush.

But each failed attempt teaches something useful and soon enough, the same person is riding effortlessly.

The goal isn’t avoiding mistakes. The goal is extracting value from them.

Learn more, faster.

Fail forward!

2. Don’t Repeat Mistakes

Making a mistake once is normal and encouraged.

Making the exact same mistake repeatedly is expensive and avoidable.

The first time you lock your keys in your car, it’s unfortunate.

The fifth time, it’s a system problem.

The first time you ignore a deadline and suffer consequences, that’s a lesson. The third time, that’s a habit.

Mistakes become valuable only when they produce change.

• A child touching a hot stove once learns an important lesson.
• A child touching the same hot stove every week is conducting unnecessary research.

One of the most useful questions you can ask after any setback is:

What system can I create so this doesn’t happen again?

Successful people don’t have perfect memories.

They build better systems.

Checklists. Calendars. Reminders. Processes. Guardrails.

Learning isn’t just about collecting lessons.

It’s about applying them!

3. Learn From Other People’s Mistakes

This is the cheapest education available.

And often the most ignored.

Many people insist on learning everything firsthand.

While experience is valuable, some lessons are unnecessarily expensive.

• If dozens of entrepreneurs share why their businesses failed, pay attention — in our town one of my favourite events for entrepreneurs is called “fuck-up night” where everyone shares their failures!
• If someone tells you they lost their life savings chasing a “guaranteed” investment opportunity, perhaps you don’t need to run the experiment yourself.
• If every experienced mountain climber warns about a dangerous route, maybe believe them?

You can borrow wisdom without paying the full price. Free money!

Books are essentially collections of other people’s mistakes and discoveries. Mentors are shortcut providers. And history is one giant database of what happens when humans make certain decisions.

The challenge is that second-hand lessons don’t always feel as convincing as personal experience.

After all, the stove doesn’t seem that hot, right?

Shall I touch it?

But the older you get, the more you realize that listening is often cheaper than learning everything the hard way.

A scar can teach a lesson. So can someone else’s scar.

One costs less…

The Art of Failing Forward

Life isn’t about eliminating mistakes.

That’s impossible. And it would make life very boring.

In fact, trying to avoid every mistake often creates a bigger problem:

Doing nothing.

People avoid starting businesses because they might fail.

They…

• avoid opportunities because they might look foolish.
• avoid growth because growth is uncomfortable.
• avoid relationships because they might get hurt.

But…

Babies don’t learn to walk by staying on the floor.

Progress requires movement.

Movement creates mistakes.

Mistakes create learning.

The goal isn’t perfection: The goal is continuous improvement.

Make mistakes. Learn from them. Avoid repeating them.

Simple, ey?

So, embrace learning from other people’s mistakes whenever possible.

And maybe — just maybe — when experienced people tell you not to touch the hot stove, consider taking their word for it.

Your fingertips will thank you.

Because in the end, success isn’t the absence of mistakes.

Success is the ability to ask better questions, make better mistakes, learn faster, and keep moving forward despite it all.

Stay curious!

Matt

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