Acai Bowls are Horrible Health Food

There was a reason I knew I shouldn’t have got one.

This is not a knock on the place I order from. Tropical Smoothie Cafe has pretty good smoothies and other bowls.

No, this is the horror that is Acai bowls.

I usually avoid Acai. I didn’t know why. There was something about it that made me question it’s existance.

I would order other bowls, yogurt based, coconut based, chia pudding, etc etc, everything but Acai. I knew what I was getting in everything else. Hell I even get the occasional kale and spinch based.

But I was lured into a trap today.

Buy one get one free Acai bowls. It had strawberries on it. Coconut. Granola. Blueberries. Honey. BANANA’S EVEN.

So I got my smoothie, and got my bowls and…

What the fuck man? It’s like tasting sour dirt. It’s like how I would imagine spoiled spinach would taste. It’s disgusting.

And it was still too hard to do anything about it. I had to wait for it to melt enough so I could mix whatever is on top of it in so it could be even remotely edible (so I didn’t waste money).

Horrible, horrible thing.

Why do people that say they enjoy this hate themselves?

0/10. After 47 is 86'ed it’s time for Acai.

This is what they feed people on death row for their real last meal.

Blech!

Edit: I wasted food and wound up throwing the second one away, I couldn’t do it.