Pay Attention To Your Child: You Might Learn From Them You Realise

You have a royal diadem in your home

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One day I was sitting when my 13 years old said to me “ Mama today we are swapping life’s, I am going to be your mother and you’ll be my daughter. I don’t think she gave me a chance to say yes or no to the challenge but Ok. She proceeded to say “Now prepare the bed because we getting ready to go to bed” There was nothing wrong with the statement, it’s the tone she said it in. Then she said “Come pray”😳. Now I could have gotten upset about the way she was commanding me because I never taught her to speak to me in that kind of attitude. I teach her to speak with respect and reverence whenever she talks to an elder. But then I realised children don’t do what you say, they do what you do.

My immediate pick up was she was doing what she saw me do to her and I was so used to doing this that I didn’t realise how bad it was doing it . I want to tell you, this broke my heart, I cried😭. The tone and the way she said it was so cold, it was void of love and affection. It was dry of any kind of warmth and care. Do I think she did this on purpose to show me just how harsh I was with my word’s towards her ? No! I don’t think so. I’m sure at this point it was normal to hear me speak like that.

Then I wondered 🤔, whenever her friends were around hearing me talk like that to her, She would probably tell them “That’s how my mom is” I just want to say this,that’s not how I’m and that’s not how you are, that act is nasty, if that act had a smell it would smell like sewage. The phrase “ that’s how I am” is a mask we hide behind so that we don’t have to change. I’m obviously using my daughter as an example but maybe in your case is not a child but a spouse, a friend, a family member or a colleague.

Then I realised how we are our children’s first bullies but because they are our children we think we have the right to treat them any how. Our children walk on eggs shells the hole day trying to figure out how to not upset us. That child grows up thinking they are not good enough. We scream at them the second they do something wrong but we never praise them when they do good.

Then I had to do a self introspection so that I can deal with that behaviour because you’ll never be able to heal your child when you are broken yourself. Hurt people,hurt people. That behaviour iminated from somewhere and it was my job to find out where it came from.

Colossians 3:21: "Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged." (NKJV)

I know a friend who can help you raise your children the right way all you have to do is accept him in your life.

Salvation Prayer 🙏

Heavenly father

I come to you today and I acknowledge that I am a sinner and I need your forgiveness. I believe that Jesus Christ is your son and that he died on the cross for my sins, and that he rose again on the third day so that I can have eternal life. I turn away from my old life and invite Jesus to be my Lord and saviour. Wash and cleanse me with your holy blood and make me a new creature. Thank you for saving me, for giving me a new heart and for making me your child. In Jesus mighty name I pray, AMEN.