If I Had to Choose One Thing I Learned This Year

Answering my own December Prompt

Photo by Julia Kuzenkov on www.pexels.com

Eat your own dog food, they say. And so, here I am.

Thanks Julia A. Keirns for adding my prompt to the list of December prompts.

What are some things you learned this past year that made you wiser?

This year I learned about the science behind happiness. This blew my mind and I remind myself of this every single day.

I watched this YouTube video by Laurie Santos on **“Why humans are surprisingly bad at being happy.”**

Summary: Our minds are not naturally wired for happiness. We need to consciously rewire them.

Most of us are not happy because of Miswanting.

Psychologists Daniel T. Gilbert and Timothy D. Wilson have termed “Miswanting” as

The act of trying to get hold of certain things we assume will make us happier but they don’t make us as happy as we think.

We are led towards Miswanting due to these top 3 annoying features of our minds:

a. Incorrect Intuitions

We often assume things like promotions, material goods, or marriage will bring lasting happiness.

However, even if we get those things, we won’t end up being happy as we may have wanted the wrong things in the first place.

b. Comparison

Instead of appreciating what we have: a stable job, home, and loving family, we tend to compare ourselves to others. Social media amplifies this, making us less happy when others seem to have more.

c. Impact Miscalculation

The joy from big changes, like moving to a bigger house or getting married, often fades over time. We overestimate how long such events will keep us happy.

We need to rewire our brains to get over these shortcomings.

1. Understand the importance of Social Connection

We systematically underestimate how much social connection can improve our mood.

True happiness comes from real connections. Visit a friend or call someone you care about. Your mind needs it.

2. Help Others

Helping others brings more satisfaction than focusing solely on yourself.

3. Practice Gratitude

Reflect on what you have. Each night, write down three things you are grateful for.

4. Slow Down and Savor

Give ample time in enjoying life’s simple pleasures like your meals, nature, or time at the beach. Put your phone aside and fully engage.

5. Exercise

A 20–30-minute walk in nature can reset your mind and energize you.

I hope you too learned something new this year. Do write about it.

Wish you all the best!