Beyond the Vows: Finding True Love in 1 Corinthians 13

Moving beyond traditional readings to a daily practice of love.

The Verse We All Know

At the risk of repeating myself, I want to share a bit more about my first marriage. But before we dive in, let’s consider how many of us have requested that 1 Corinthians 13 be read aloud at our weddings? It is a staple of the marriage ceremony, alongside another popular choice, Ruth 1:16: “But Ruth replied, ‘Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.’” Scholars often point out the true context of this verse: it has little to do with romantic marriage and everything to do with Ruth’s loyal devotion to her mother-in-law after the death of her husband. Yet, we pull these verses into our ceremonies as anchors for our commitment.

Photo by Mayur Gala on Unsplash

Recently, 1 Corinthians 13 was featured as the verse of the day on The Bible App: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.” While I initially felt prompted to write about it immediately, I sensed a nudge to wait for more clarity. Looking back at my own journey, I can see why that patience was necessary.

A Shift in Perspective

The reason I ask about your wedding choices is that I, too, chose this famous “love chapter” for my first wedding at age 21. That reading, combined with a prayer by my father, was the only sacred inclusion in an otherwise secular event. Sadly, I cannot say we honored the intended depth of those words. Honestly, I believe this chapter offers a more profound set of vows than the traditional or personalized ones we often hear. While personal vows can be charming, the reality of living out this scripture in its fullness makes the odds of a lifelong partnership exponentially higher.

For my second ( and final earthly) redemption marriage, we chose Ephesians 4:2 as our foundation: “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.” In a more practical, more grounded way, we set this verse as our marriage mission statement. With God’s help at the center of our marriage, we sometimes need to hit the reset button on humility and gentleness, but it is indeed the theme of our interactions with one another and with others we encounter along the way. I also recognize it is never too late to reintegrate 1 Corinthians 13 into a marriage — or any relationship, for that matter.

Author’s marriage verse

The Ultimate Challenge

Some suggest you could easily replace the word “love” in this chapter (1 Corinthians 13) with the name of Jesus. Others see it as the perfect guide for a healthy spiritual life. But what if we applied this chapter more broadly? What if we used it as a blueprint for how we love our neighbors, both literally and proverbially? That would change the world. Whether you believe the Kingdom of God is a present reality or a future hope, living out 1 Corinthians 13 captures the tone of the world I imagine. It reminds me of the longing in John Lennon’s ***Imagine, or even more accurately, MercyMe’s [I Can Only Imagine](https://youtu.be/N_lrrq_opng?si=TQhQ6Kn4OBRvrtZe)***. Regardless of our beliefs, we are all united by the fact that our time here is limited. We all face the inevitable question of what comes next. Personally, I find peace in the theology that my next conscious moment will be in the presence of the Lord. That assurance is enough to guide how I live and love today.

It’s funny how a reflection on wedding readings can lead to thoughts on eternity. But perhaps that is the point — God works in mysterious, interconnected ways. I have a favor to ask of you: would you take a moment to read 1 Corinthians 13 and substitute your own name for the word “love”? Does it ring true? Does it highlight areas for growth? I promise to do the same. I never ask anything of my students or friends that I wouldn’t do myself. Will you join me in this practice?

Until next time, **happy reading and sweet dreams** of our happily ever after.

AI consulted only for editing purposes.

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