I Read 40+ Romance Books in 4 Months

ADHD Hyperfixations Are Weird: The Time I Became Obsessed With Romance Books

Photo by Konstantin Dyadyun on Unsplash

A year ago, I had barely read any romance novels. But then I listened to one, and before I could realize, I was down the rabbit hole, reading, rather listening to entire books in a day. Honestly, I realized I had a problem after 4 months when I couldn’t focus until I got to the end of the book.

So, I forced myself to stop reading books. You know, initially, you tell yourself, just one chapter, I can take it slow.

WRONG!

I couldn’t take it slow. So, I had to quit almost cold turkey.

It started when I told my therapist that I wanted to read books for fun again, but I couldn’t anymore because I got sick once. I listened to audiobooks, so I started subconsciously associating listening to them with feeling sick. So, I just couldn’t focus on audiobooks after that.

Anyway, my therapist recommended reading something for fun to jumpstart the process, and oh boy, it worked, but not in the way either of us thought it would.

What started as a random recommendation turned into a full-blown obsession. I downloaded the book “Fourth Wing” for a flight, and when I listened to it, I couldn’t stop. The story was so riveting and the author ruthless that I couldn’t stop. I listened to these books on Audible or Speechify text-to-speech software to listen and read the PDF files simultaneously. Somewhere between “just one more chapter” and listening at 2x speed, romance novels quietly took over my life.

If you have ADHD, you may recognize this pattern. Interests do not arrive gently; they arrive all at once. One week, something is mildly interesting. A month later, it has become your entire personality.

That is how I ended up reading more than forty romance books in four months — many of them very much 18+.

But while reading the romance books, I realized I wasn’t don’t just reading these books because they were spicy, I realized I was reading them because they exhibited something much deeper than attraction. The feeling of being understood, accepted, and chosen for who you exactly are.

Most of the romance novels I read revolved around the same fantasy: being chosen completely.

To have someone who understands you.

Someone who accepts your flaws instead of merely tolerating them.

Someone who sees the worst parts of you and still chooses to stay and protects, cherishes, and continues choosing you even when life becomes difficult.

That is why these stories resonated so deeply. They provide hope of finding love, belonging, safety, and acceptance.

As I moved from one book to another, I noticed the same emotional patterns appearing repeatedly.

Enemies become lovers.

Friends become lovers.

Women who think they are weak discover how strong they truly are.

And perhaps my favorite story of all: a woman who has spent her entire life taking care of everyone else finally meets someone with whom she can put down the burden.

For the first time, she is not responsible for fixing everything.

For the first time, someone takes care of her.

There is something deeply satisfying about watching characters receive the love, loyalty, and protection they have always deserved.

Over these four months, fictional people somehow became real enough to matter.

I laughed with them.

I cried for them.

I giggled at their banter.

And sometimes vehemently hated certain characters in those books.

The emotional investment is absurd when you think about it.

These people do not exist.

Yet somehow, they leave very real emotions behind.

The Empyrean series by Rebecca Yarros was one of the series that affected me the most. It is an unfinished series with only 3 out of the 5 books released.

The author left major cliffhangers at the end of each book, and I kid you not, I cried at the end of every book, and since only 3 of the books were out, I couldn’t understand how I was supposed to wait until the next book.

I sought out podcasts, author interviews, and theory posts to get a gist of what might happen, and well, everyone else was suffering like me. Honestly, after I finished the third book, I was sobbing, and I just stared at the wall, wondering how an author could be both so brilliant and so evil.

I highly recommend people to read that book because misery loves company, haha.

After reading these books, I realized that people read romance for many reasons.

Some read for comfort.

Some for escapism.

Some for emotional intensity.

And yes, some for the spice.

I read romance because it allows me to escape into a world where happily-ever-afters exist.

A world where people communicate.

Where people heal.

Where love feels intentional and safe.

Where people choose each other, again and again.

These books have quietly changed my standards.

They remind me that love should feel safe.

That being cherished is not too much to ask for.

That settling for less than we deserve rarely ends well.

Maybe that is why romance remains one of the world’s most popular genres.

Not because readers are naïve.

But because these stories remind us what healthy love can look like.

And if I am being completely honest, fictional men have set the bar tremendously high.

While I don’t binge-read romance books anymore, I still pick up a book from time to time to remind myself of the possibility of those Happily-Ever-Afters.

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