Pops, I Came Alive, I Could Fly

It's a little turbulent, but I'm learning on the fly.

Photo by Alessio Cesario: https://www.pexels.com/photo/opened-glass-window-1906795/

The three-year anniversary of my dad's passing is next month, and I'm beginning to feel like myself again, maybe not, I'm not sure.

Let's take a deep breath.

I'm doing well.

My friends and I have been talking consistently again, not only through text but also over the phone or in person, which I am proud of.

I share some parts of what I have been going through but Because I am still processing certain parts, I have to ease myself into sharing more of what has been going on.

I have been really quiet and to myself for the last three years. The majority of my days have been spent working, going to therapy and coming home to reflect, but I'm still in touch with my immediate family.

Within the last three months or so I have decided to step outside so to speak. The one thing I did that I don't normally do is attend work events and usually I would turn it down, but I was like just go and let it happen. I had a great time and look forward to going out again.

Almost like riding a bike for the first time again, the feeling of wanting to be present again is scary and I am trying to find my balance in real time.

Talking and mingling with new people feels new and adventurous, and maybe because I feel like a new person. It used to give me anxiety, but I welcome it now.

Finally, being open again has led me to meeting someone and feels genuine so far. She makes me feel comfortable being myself and that makes my want to open up more.

I won't overthink it and I will just it bloom and blossom to what it's supposed to be. For a long time, my dad always wanted me to be more open to new things and just life changes in general, and I am trying in his honor.

Key Message: Be open, it's an opportunity to meet a brand new you