If You’re Bored And Lonely — Try This

Try adopting an English language learning student if you lack social connection and would like to help someone.

I’m not saying you need to teach an English student from scratch, where they have no knowledge of the English language, where you have to hold up a picture of a cat or a flower. I’m talking about an English student who is at the intermediate to advanced level. Often the hardest part with learning English is getting past the intermediate level.

You can have a really good conversation with an intermediate level student. They just have to pause a little bit to find the right word. They may also take some time to get used to your accent and to feel less stressed talking to a new person.

I find the best place to meet students is online. I recommend chatting via a video call, that way you can see when they are struggling with a word. I think the cues you can pick up when you can see the student is very helpful.

I am a member of a formal volunteering organisation where I have two students. Tutoring this way requires an application process, some training and some ongoing requirements. But you don’t need to do it this way, there are a couple of easier ways.

Firstly, my preferred way is to use a site called Conversation Exchange. It’s pretty much the only way I meet students outside of my formal volunteering organisation. You create a profile telling the other people on the site what you’re looking for, your hobbies, interests etc.

One tip with Conversation Exchange is that it is normally a language exchange site, so you may have to put in a random language that you’re learning. Then explain in your profile you just want to tutor someone in English (or another language)

Then you can use the search function to find people from specific countries or the whole world if you want. You can search by a range of criteria. One thing to keep in mind is your preferred time to talk and their time zone. Some time zones can be tricky. Because I am based in Australia, Asia works well for me due to the small time zone difference. Also, the USA and Canada work well for me too as I like to talk during the day and that is the evening in the USA and Canada. The time zone for Europe can be pretty tough for me as they are eight hours behind my time zone and I don’t like talking that much in the evening.

I find that university students can be good people to talk to, as they often have a more flexible schedule than a person that works in a job.

When you message someone on Conversation Exchange it makes it a bit easier if you create a template of what you want to say. Not all people will respond, so you might need to message multiple people to get a response.

One of the first things I check when someone responds is their availability. Then, to arrange times, what phone apps they want to text on. I tend to get off the site messaging system pretty quickly and use a messaging app instead. My preferred app to text on is WhatsApp. I like to do my video calls on Microsoft Teams as I have a paid licence without a time limit. I like Microsoft Teams screen sharing capabilities and the excellent audio quality due to AI background noise cancellation. I feel like all the video calling apps are excellent now though, like WhatsApp and Facetime.

I have this slight obsession with microphones because I want to sound as clear as possible. The funny thing is that the wired Apple EarPods have one of the best sounding microphones and is one of the cheapest headsets to use.

If you’re a native speaker, you don’t need a lot more. Some options to keep the conversation going include:

• Creating a list of questions before the session
• Thinking of a story to tell about your life or your culture
• Using free English language learning sites like BBC Learn English
• Watching a short video together via screen sharing and discussing the content.
• You can ask the student what kind of learning they want to focus on, but many just want to practise general conversation
• If I run out of things to talk about, sometimes I switch to getting the student to read English articles out loud. I correct their pronunciation, discuss the meaning of words and the articles themselves. Engo Daily News is a good site for this.

There is another site that I find quite fascinating. Episoden, where you get matched with English language learners for seven minute conversations. It could be a good way to meet students but it can also just be an interesting place to hangout.

You do have to have a little bit of bravery to talk to a new random stranger on Episoden every seven minutes. I don’t spend a lot of time there as I prefer talking to my students for an hour every week.

Once a week conversations work quite well for me, as there is usually something to talk about from the past week. If you talk too frequently I find that you run out of things to talk about, so it’s a struggle to talk for an hour.

But you don’t have to just stick to one student. I have around eleven students a week. It sounds like a lot but it’s only one to two each day, plus I am retired now, so I have quite a bit of spare time.

Also, because it is online, often I only need a few minutes to sit down and connect with my student. Most of my students are at the same time each week, so there is very little administration if you use a calendar with recurring meetings.

Oh and I’m an introvert. But I like talking one-to-one with people and I like to have a plan for the week and each day. It works well for me. I can have a couple of hours of conversation for the day and then I can go back to my solo activities.

What have you got to lose, it could be the most rewarding part of your week. I think there is no greater joy than helping someone.

In closing I will list a couple of relevant longevity statistics:

• Strong social connections increase the likelihood of survival by 50%, making them a critical factor for longevity comparable to quitting smoking.
• Volunteering is associated with a 24% to 47% reduction in all-cause mortality risk among older adults.

I blog about my volunteer English Tutoring adventures at English Tutor Dad.

And you can talk from anywhere using a tablet, tripod and headset…