A Crazy Little Thing Called Love: Could it be Classified as a Disease?

With symptoms similar to obsessive disorders and drug addiction, love has been compared to illnesses by everyone from Soviet poets to modern American scientists.

This morning, while scrolling my LinkedIn feed, I encountered a test entitled ‘Can love be a disease?’. I did not open it — maybe I was too afraid of doing that. This question immediately reminded me of a verse written by the Russian poet Anna Akhmátova in her poem Twenty-one:

“I stumbled upon it casually and since then, / I feel as if I’m sick”.

In this text, Akhmátova writes about a foggy Monday night when some idler made up the story that there was love in the world. Out of laziness or boredom, we all believed in it. Since that day, everyone has been waiting for meetings, in fear of breakups, and singing love songs. She, on the other hand, just felt sick.

Maybe she was just a heartbroken writer affected by the cold of the Russian winter or, indeed, was a wise woman. What we know a hundred years after she wrote these words is that she is not the only one talking about love as a disease. This subject has been studied for over 2,000 years, and despite this, love may well be the least understood behaviour in all humankind.

In my homeland, more than Saci-Pererê, everyone talks about the story of a singer who died of love. I grew up hearing this folk legend as absolute truth. If it is possible or not, the fact is that in the last 20 years, scientists have been paying more attention to the chemical storm that romantic love can cause in our brains. Analysis of cerebrum scans shows that being in love causes changes in the brain that are strikingly similar to serious health problems like drug addiction and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Your heart pounds, your palms sweat, your stomach fills with butterflies, and your mind fails to focus on anything else.

It is all about chemicals

Chemically, all these reactions can be explained. When we are in love, the brain undergoes a series of changes that affect our perception, emotions, and behaviour. One of the main changes occurs in the release of neurotransmitters, chemicals that help transmit signals between brain cells. In the initial phase of falling in love, there is an increase in the release of dopamine, norepinephrine, and phenylethylamine, which are associated with feelings of happiness, motivation, euphoria, and excitement. These neurotransmitters activate areas of the brain related to pleasure, such as the nucleus accumbens and prefrontal cortex.

Another important neurotransmitter is serotonin, which regulates our mood and anxiety. When we fall in love, the release of serotonin is reduced, which may explain why people feel more anxious and obsessive about their loved ones. According to the world-renowned Doctor Philip Stieg in an interview for Health Matters, ‘’falling in love is an obsession. While you are wild about someone, your serotonin levels go down — which is the same trend typically found in people with obsessive-compulsive behaviour. It is also true that a brain in love is very similar to a brain in the throes of addiction’’.

Moreover, other studies show that the brains of loved-up people show reduced critical judgment and decision-making activity. This can cause people in love to make irrational decisions like buying stupidly expensive things or neglecting warning signs related to loved ones, such as a criminal record. This leads us to think that, in addition to everything else, love can also be dangerous and self-destructive.

Love can also affect the autonomic nervous system, which regulates bodily functions like heart rate and breathing. When we are in love, the activity of the sympathetic nervous system increases, which can explain the sensations of butterflies in the stomach, excessive sweating, and trembling hands, for example.

Do you know there is even a term used to refer to diseases caused by love? Lovesickness. Although it is not an officially recognized disorder, experts agree it can destroy your body. But, more importantly, growing lovesick often leads to changes in your behaviour — sometimes to an extent you did not think you could reach, such as committing a crime.

Let’s learn more about three disturbing-psychological love disorders in addition to the physical symptoms caused by love-related illnesses:

Erotomania

It might feel wonderful to be kissed every morning. The only issue is that many of us do not get that feeling every single day of our lives — perhaps our partners are not as passionate about us anymore, or maybe we are single and lonely.

It is not unusual to crave love and attention, but people with erotomania take it to a whole new level: They believe that there is that one special person who is deeply in love with them. To make things even more harmful, that special person often happens to be a celebrity or someone with a much higher status than the sufferer.

Obsessive love

Having the image of your love object burnt to the back of your eyelids and an intense feeling of passion is normal in the beginning stages of a romantic relationship. Still, as time passes, your love for each other evolves into something less intense but more sustainable.

Unfortunately, people with obsessive love disorder do not seem to get over the infatuation stage and fail to overcome an obsessive desire to possess the other person. Essentially, they are unable to handle rejection. If rejected, they might hurt or even kill themselves.

In some cases, people who love obsessively may stalk their victims, become manipulative or even control people through deprivation of food, money, or freedom.

Until now, obsessive love has not been categorised under any specific mental diagnosis, but some suggest it must be considered a mental illness due to its disruptive nature.

Attachment disorder

This issue affects people who did not experience a strong bond with their primary caregivers as children. To form a healthy attachment, a newborn’s primary needs have to be satisfied. They include nourishment, touch, eye contact, movement, and smile.

In some cases, children fail to form healthy relationships with adults. This can be due to neglect, abuse, separation from primary caregivers between six months and three years of age, and frequent change of caregivers. As a result, the child — and later adult — does not feel safe around others.

When it comes to romantic relationships, an adult with attachment disorder may choose one of the two extremes, depending on their personality: avoiding close relationships altogether or becoming an anxious people pleaser.

The first type is usually characterised by the fear of intimacy, compulsive self-reliance, lack of trust, and anger. The second type is characterised by clingy or insecure behaviour, compulsive caregiving, jealousy, and possessiveness.

The power of setting everything on fire

“The brain system involved in romantic love is powerful”, says Helen Fisher, an anthropologist at New Jersey’s Rutgers University who has led much of the research into love’s impact on the brain. Love does conquer much, but not always in a good way. So can it be called a disease?

What I have found after all is that if love can not kill, it definitely can make you sick. Later on, I discovered this guy from the beginning suffered from cancer — another disease as dangerous as love.