Everything doesn’t need your mouth.

Everything doesn’t need your mouth.

Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

Maybe half of our problems can be solved by doing one simple thing:

Keeping quiet.

Not quiet like you are avoiding people. Not quiet like you are depressed. Not quiet like you are forming this mysterious babe personality thing. Just quiet like… Close your mouth. Because truly, some of the stress we call “life” is just the consequences of talking too much.

We talk ourselves into pressure. We talk ourselves into expectations. We talk ourselves into promises we were never ready to keep. We speak too early. We explain too much. We overshare. We overcommit. We overstate.

And then we wake up one day shocked that we are overwhelmed, drained, and slightly embarrassed.

But how will we not be?

You announced a seed like it was harvest. You told everybody you were starting something before you even understood what it required (and this works sometimes, it’s good to faith somethings out). You said “big things coming” when you hadn’t even opened the document. You told your friends about the relationship before you knew the person’s middle name. You told your family “it’s serious” when you hadn’t even had one hard conversation.

You spoke.

Now you have to maintain what you said. Now you have to perform. Now you have to keep up with a version of yourself that was only excited, not wise. Because yes, excitement is beautiful. But excitement is also a liar sometimes. It makes you think you can carry what you have not trained for. It makes you talk like you have arrived when you have only just left the house. And it’s not even that you are doing too much. You are just saying too much.

Everything doesn’t need your mouth. Some things need silence. Some things need time. Some things need prayer. Some things need planning. Some things need discipline. Some things need consistency.

Not noise.

With new bonds especially… you suddenly want to share the whole world. You want to explain everything. Your fears. Your past. Your next move. Your five-year plan. Your trauma. Your family history. Your deepest wounds. Your biggest dreams. And it’s not because you are foolish. It’s because some spaces makes you feel safe. And safety makes you want to open your mouth wide like a child. But wisdom will tap you on the shoulder and say: “Baby girl… relax.” Not everything needs to be said. Not everything needs to be shared. Not everybody needs access to your whole life because they asked, or because they listened, or because they made you laugh. Maybe they could be said, but maybe in due time? at the right time? with just enough words?

Because words are not neutral.

Words carry weight.

The Bible wasn’t playing when it said life and death is in the tongue. Because the tongue can give life to good things…but it can also kill good things. Not because you are a bad person. But because you said too much than necessary. And now you are tired.

So maybe this year, we try something new.

Not silence like “I am angry.”

Not silence like “I am punishing you.”

Not silence like “I am gatekeeping everything”

Not silence like “I am scared of village people”

Silence like self-control.

Silence like maturity.

Let the results speak.

We rather you speak about results anyways.

Talk less.

Do more.

Don’t talk about doing. Don’t talk about what you are going to do. Don’t talk about when you are going to do it. Don’t talk about how you are going to do it. Don’t talk about who you are going to do it with.

Just do it.

This was written by favour Ogazi. the things i wanted to write but i couldn’t find the right word