How to Embrace the Love You Haven’t Found Yet

Learn to Appreciate Your Life Now and Create Space for Future Love

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Are you among those who believe that everyone else is finding love while you’re on the sidelines? Of course, I have been there. When all those couples snuggle up with one another, letting themselves bask in the comfort of proximity, it can be all too easy to slip into a feeling of just being — left out.

However, embracing the love you haven’t found yet isn’t about passively waiting. It’s about learning to appreciate and love where you are right now, even if it seems lonely.

First, Know Yourself

You have to be cool with yourself before you can be okay with love from someone else. Think about it: when was the last time you were cool with your company? Around the things that make you happy, whether it’s a hobby, new experiences in different places, or just being with a good book.

I can recall when, as much as I wanted to find “the one,” I had forgotten to live my life as my best friend. When I started focusing on myself, life felt so much fuller.

Never Accept Less

If you are tired of waiting, it is tempting to give in, but you will most likely regret it. I remember one instance when I went out with someone only because he was available, not because he was right for me. Big mistake.

Trying to find someone to fill a gap leads the relationship to fizzle fast drastically, and because I found a piece of me in the right person, therein lies the key.

Be open but not desperate.

There is a thin line between openness to love and desperation for it. In your desperation, you hold on to the first semblance of affection, which is always unhealthy.

Holding onto your optimism is OK, but remember that your worth does not depend on what others think of you. I used to think something was wrong with me when I was alone. But there is power in knowing that you are whole all on your own.

Love the Process

Love is a journey. It really shouldn’t be about rushing toward the finish line but rather about stories, laughter, growth, and even heartaches that come with it. Every one of those will help you learn what you’re supposed to need or want, just like trying out the different dishes you have before you get to like one.

So enjoy the process. Scream with laughter at lousy dates and sucky times, and celebrate those times that come together to make you feel alive.

Build a Full Life

Don’t put your life on hold while waiting for love. Build a life that is beautiful and full of character so that you relish it. Travel, hang out with friends, learn something new.

Love will find you when it complements a life well-lived, not when it completes it. Once, someone had told me: “Be the person you want to date.” That stuck with me because of the massive truth that it means learning to be in love with life, not just trying to fill that space in life with love.

Stay Hopeful, Not Hopeless

It can be so easy to get down on life and love. But then, remember this: just because you haven’t found it yet doesn’t mean you never will. Sometimes, love shows up quite unexpectedly-like a surprise gift.

And when it does, it absolutely will have been worth the wait. Keep your heart open, your mind clear, and your hopes high. That love you’re looking for might be around the corner.