A Martial Arts Class Taught Me how to Stand Up for Myself and to Build Confidence in Myself.

Photo by LOGAN WEAVER | @LGNWVR on Unsplash

Years ago, when I was living in Seattle, I decided to take a martial arts class. I was looking for an interesting way to be active. I thought that it would be fun and It was something I wanted do for a while. I found a woman’s self defense class I could afford and decided to go for it. I got a lot more out of the class than fitness. I learned how to stand up for myself and that helped me have more confidence in myself.

Growing up, I lacked confidence and had low self worth. I was very shy and a people pleaser. When I was a kid I was often bullied and I didn’t know how to defend myself. I was afraid of conflict and I didn’t want to make people mad. It was often hard for me to stand up for myself. As an adult I had learned to stand up for my self more. However, I still didn’t like conflict and would often avoid it.

The class was in a women’s martial arts studio in Seattle where I lived at the time. The instructor would lead us through a warm up, self defense techniques and martial arts moves I learned how to throw a punch without hurting my hand.

I also learned how to be more assertive and speak out more. Part of the class was shouting with our voice when we made certain moves. At first, I was uncomfortable with that but it became easier. The instructor encouraged us to use our voices. The class sparked an interest in martial arts and self defense. I read books about how to stand up for myself. I started watching martial arts films. All of this made me less afraid of conflict and more confident.

She taught us how to deal with a a rude person approaching us. The instructor told us that if you are walking and a man hassles you, to walk past quickly. She also said to say, something quickly like ” I don’t have time for that right now.” I remember one time when I took a walk and this guy yelled at me. I did what the instructor said. He backed away and I stayed safe.

Taking this class helped me feel more confident which made it easier to stand up for myself. I remember one day when I was out running errands, I started chatting with a man. He said something rude. In the past I would have let it slide and stayed silent to keep the peace. This time, I didn’t do that and I spoke out. I let him know that I didn’t appreciate what he said. I was more assertive than I would have been before I took the class. He looked a little surprised at what I said but he backed off with no incident or conflict.

I was a little surprised that he took it as well as he did. Up until that point, I wouldn't have talked anyone like that. I will never forget that moment. It made me realize that I didn’t have to go through life afraid of conflict. I realized that I could speak out more and it could be ok even fun. I realized that that some people like it when you are assertive. It made me think that maybe I don’t have to put up with as much disrespect from people.

I often think back go that day. It took me a long to to have much confidence. It is a lesson I wish I would have learned sooner but never late than never. It was one of the best things I did for myself. I will always remember what I learned from that class.