Why Being Available All the Time

Teaches everyone they can reach you, except the person who needs you most: yourself.

Photo by Nicolas Messifet on Unsplash

Recently, I started prioritising myself.

I started saying no.

Before that, when someone invited me to something, I would often hesitate to decline. I would nod reluctantly and say “Yes!” Yet deep down, all I really want to do is say no. Afterwards, I would sit down, exhausted! Bloody hell! I wish I had said no. Never again, but I do it anyway. That’s me. Do you?

Having lived for six decades has changed my perspective and created an urgency to stop. Now. Is it because time is fleeting?

Why do we do it? Often, it’s because we fear damaging relationships or feeling guilty. Guilty of what? Being true to ourselves?

You wanted to decline a social invitation. Unsolicited advice. A phone call that drains your energy. And yet you say yes. As a result, other people benefit. But we lose our freedom, mental clarity, and energy.

Do we say yes because we fear losing out? Or is it because we want to be included that we become available?

Could it be that the cost of repeatedly saying yes to other people’s wishes would make us want to make a change?

If I look within, every time I ignore my honest “no,” I prove to myself that my voice carries less weight than everyone else’s. And saying yes to other people means saying no to myself.