Chapter One: The Man Who Was Always Just Out of Reach

So I started asking myself something recently.

Why do some women try the hardest for the men who give them the least?

Because if I’m honest, the first man in this series was never really mine to begin with.

The signs were there from the beginning.

He was distant.

Not rude. Not cruel.

Just… slightly out of reach.

The kind of man who answers sometimes. The kind of man who shows interest just enough to keep you curious.

And somehow that small amount of attention feels like something you need to earn.

He wasn’t even the type of man I usually go for.

He was flashy.

The kind of man who stepped out of a beautiful Audi like he belonged in a music video. Perfect white veneers. Chains around his neck that caught the light when he talked. Confidence that filled every room before he even said a word.

Five years older than me.

Charismatic in the way that makes you feel like you’re the only person he sees when he’s speaking.

But charisma can be misleading.

Because the same charm that makes a man magnetic can also make him hard to read.

And the more distant he was, the more I found myself trying.

Trying to understand him. Trying to get his attention. Trying to prove that I was worth the effort he never quite gave.

Looking back now, I realize something uncomfortable.

The red flags weren’t hidden.

They were just ignored. Just like I ignored the girl in his following that had his exact initials in her bio. Or how I ignored the fact that when I asked her about him, she told me that was her man. I listened to him though when he sat in front of me and lied blatantly to my face and told me he didn’t know her. What was the biggest flashing red flag was when I tested positive for an std and I was only sleeping with him. So when I asked him about it by the end of the conversation I was not only convinced he wasn’ t sleeping around but that the test was inaccurate.

Turns out the girl wasn’t a liar, and that he was sleeping around.

I ignored the red flags because I thought if I tried a little harder, loved a little deeper, or showed up a little more consistently… eventually he would meet me halfway.

But some people don’t meet you halfway.

Some people stay exactly where they are while you do all the moving.

And that’s when the truth finally crossed my mind.

Sometimes the person you’re chasing isn’t mysterious.

They’re just unavailable.

Lesson From This Man

Distance isn’t always a puzzle to solve.

Sometimes it’s the answer.