Confessions of an Accidental Unicorn Pt. 1

What is a unicorn?

I didn’t know what a unicorn was the first time someone tried to turn me into one.

A unicorn is a rare creature not normally found in the wild.

In the context of non-traditional relationships, a unicorn is usually a woman (or woman-identifying person) who enters an existing couple’s relationship for a romantic or sexual dynamic. Often, there’s an unspoken expectation that she will be attracted to both partners equally.

My first experience as an accidental unicorn happened long before I even knew the term existed.

The burn

It happened at a festival.

Not a typical music festival, but a local burn — similar to Burning Man, just on a smaller scale.

The people who go to these events tend to be open-minded. The hippie type. Experimental. Down for an experience.

I had been to festivals and raves before, but this was my first burn. The culture was a little different. There was more emphasis on community and the idea of “leave no trace,” rather than just partying for the weekend.

At least on the surface.

Like I usually did at festivals, I dressed up. I had put together a steampunk outfit: a mini top hat, goggles, a neon green short wig, and a white corset bustier top.

I felt confident. Playful. Ready to meet people and explore.

At one point I met a group of three people: one man and two women. They seemed friendly enough. Actually, they seemed very excited to meet me.

Looking back now, I can guess why.

At that particular burn, there weren’t many people who looked like me — a Black girl who loved dressing up and seemed open-spirited and adventurous.

Rare.

Just like a unicorn.

They invited me to hang out at their camp for a while, and I accepted. While we were sitting there talking, they gave me a gift.

It was a small wooden block, like the alphabet blocks babies play with. Except this one had a laser-cut engraving of a unicorn on it.

I was excited to receive the random gift.

What I didn’t realize at the time was that I had no idea what I had just accepted.

Something feels off

They mentioned wanting to walk around the festival later and said I was welcome to join them. They seemed overly eager for me to stick with them.

At first I thought nothing of it. I was just excited to make new friends.

But after sitting around the camp for a while, something started to feel off.

I wanted to go explore the festival. I mentioned that I was ready to walk around.

That’s when the man suddenly got defensive.

“We don’t move unless I say so.”

The way he said it felt aggressive.

I remember thinking: What kind of dynamic do they have going on?

I didn’t agree to being ordered around. I thought I had just met some new festival friends.

His energy rubbed me the wrong way immediately.

I sat there for a moment, trying to decide what to do. Should I stay and keep the peace? Or leave?

Eventually he stepped away to talk to someone in a neighboring camp.

And that’s when my intuition got loud.

I left.

What I didn’t know yet

Later on, I learned what a unicorn was.

And suddenly that entire interaction made a lot more sense.

Looking back, I sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had stayed. I was only about twenty-three at the time — open-hearted, trusting, and still pretty naive about certain dynamics.

Would they have tried to push me into something I wasn’t comfortable with?

Would I have felt pressured to go along with it?

I’ll never know.

But I’m glad I trusted my gut that day.

The first lesson

That was my first experience as an accidental unicorn.

I had unknowingly crossed paths with unicorn hunters without realizing I was being hunted.

Looking back now, I think about how easily situations like that can happen — especially when someone is young, curious, and trying to make friends in spaces that seem open and accepting on the surface.

For me, it became an early lesson in discernment.

Not everyone who is excited to meet you has good intentions.

And sometimes your intuition speaks before you fully understand why.

Learning to trust that feeling has saved me more than once.