Quiz: Is He Falling in Love with You or are you Just a Guest on His Podcast?

No need to livestream your uncertainty

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Sometimes when you’re with a guy and the conversation is flowing, you might think, “This is the one.” Then, suddenly, he says, “Well that’s all the time we have today. Thanks so much for coming on my podcast.”

Ugh, so embarrassing.

Avoid this mistake in the future by taking this foolproof quiz to determine if he’s in love or using you to generate content.

1. When you meet up he… A: Gives you a big hug. B: Gives you a big pair of headphones.

2. When you have conversations he… A: Nods and asks you probing questions to better understand the person he’s with. B: Checks the sound levels while asking questions that he thinks his listeners will care about.

3. You think you two might have a future because you talk about … A: Getting a rescue dog together. B: Getting sponsorships.

4. When he leads you into a small soundproof room you… A: Scream and fight your way out. B: Are impressed by his professionalism.

5. You get upset when he unfavorably compares you to… A: His ex. B: Ira Glass.

6. After a year together you two have… A: An inside joke. B: A marketable catchphrase.

7. Your first fight was about… A: His refusal to admit you were more than a casual girl he hooks up with. B: His refusal to admit that he kept interrupting your stories.

8. Sometimes at night, when you least expect it, he sends you… A: 🍆? B: 🎙?

9. An ideal evening with him includes… A: Making sweet love. B: Making sweet love on a Casper Mattress.

10. When you two fight he… A: Gets quiet, because he doesn’t like confrontation. B: Repeats his arguments over and over so he can be sure to have the best take later when he edits in order to elicit sympathy for himself.

11. For your last birthday he got you… A: A book. B: A pop-filter.

12. Your deepest fear is… A: He will cheat on you with that girl from the juice shop. B: He will murder you while you two are hiking just to start his own investigative podcast that focuses on finding your killer.

13. Should you decide to breakup with him you plan to do it… A: On the park bench where you met. B: In a review on iTunes.

14. After things are over you will get revenge by… A: Telling all of your girlfriends how bad he was in bed. B: Starting your own podcast called “Ex-host” and graphically describe his shortcomings as a podcaster.

15. If you could have changed one thing about him it would be… A: His cleanliness. B: His intro.

16. You liked him because he made you… A: Smile. B: enunciate.

17. In the end you learned… A: When it’s over, let them go. B: When it’s over, unsubscribe.

18. The most important thing you’ll look for next is… A: A man who understands how to talk about his feelings. B: A man who understands SEO.

19. The app you’re using now is… A: Tinder. B: Anchor.

Answer:

Mostly A’s-Congratulations! It is (or might become) a relationship!

Mostly B’s-Congratulations! You’re on a podcast!