‘Pokemon Kid’ and the Real Cringe

I value enthusiasm over cynicism and apathy, but I’m not immune to the fear of appearing uncool. If others are to be believed, this contradiction is not uncommon. All across the world, shame often dictates behavior. Sometimes this is a good thing — when the shame is valid and the guilt is clean, when you know you’ve done wrong and you’re driven by either petty denial or genuine remorse. I’ve known this shame. At times, however, due to arbitrary social pressures, shame can be unearned. This is where “cringe” comes into the picture, and this is where we meet “Pokemon Kid”.

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This video was originally posted on the now defunct Google Video. The earliest snapshot on the Internet Archive’s Wayback Machine is dated February 3rd, 2006. If the snapshots are to be believed, the video itself is dated November 20, 1985, which is impossible for a number of reasons. The video was later sent to and published by popular (at the time, at least) meme aggregator eBaum’s World for subsequent ridicule.

“Pokemon Kid” depicts a child — dressed as a Pokemon trainer, surrounded by Pokemon merchandise, and carrying a guitar — singing their own version of the original Pokemon theme song. The song seems to focus on the 3rd generation Pokemon video games, Ruby and Sapphire for the Game Boy Advance. The child has an accent and the video is of particularly low fidelity, so many of the lyrics are difficult to understand.

I’ve heard a rumor that the video was a submission to a Pokemon song lyrics contest, but I have found no evidence of such a contest around this period of time. If anyone has further knowledge regarding the origins of this video, I’d love to hear about it in the comments.

I must have first seen the video around the time of its release. I had just entered adulthood and, as a young white monster of a human being, I was more than eager to jump on the bandwagon of ridicule. There were laughs to be had at the child’s ambiguous gender, the child’s weight, or the notion that the child may be disabled. I was part of a disgusting internet culture in which nothing was off limits and no insult or injury was ever quite far enough. Perhaps there is a lesson to be learned here in the present.

The real cringe

In my adolescence and into early adulthood I was a destructive troll in many virtual spaces. I had grown up in the wild west of the early internet with nearly unfettered access to everything it had in store. As an undiagnosed autistic kid, I had been granted an opportunity to socialize on equal footing with my peers. Unfortunately, this was a new and often anonymizing form of communication. These were not the skills necessary to operate in the physical world.

I’ve heard it said that the early internet was a haven for neurodivergent people, and I do think there’s something to that. The type of communication afforded by the internet was more comforting to me, and I imagine the same could be said for many others. Nonetheless, it didn’t always promote the healthiest interpersonal behavior. The advent of social media consolidation brought waves of neurotypical internet denizens as well, only complicating the matter further.

I do, however, believe there was another migration before the consolidation of social media. Sometime in the mid 2000’s it felt as though discussions on the internet had become more cruel. The neurodivergent behavior that felt safe at the time was being seen as a source of ridicule and amusement. I would not attribute this wave of cruelty as having come from neurotypical people alone. I joined their forces myself after all, as did many other neurodivergent people I knew at the time.

This corresponded, from what I can tell, with a cultural shift toward crass humor in general. Movies, music, media of all sorts were jumping on the bandwagon. Offensive comedy had become exceedingly common to the degree that it was beginning to feel like “comedy” and “offense” were synonymous. This is not to say that comedy should ever be censored, but often times the cruelty was hardly comedy at all.

Like many others, I left a trail of threads and comments under various names across the internet. I roleplayed on web forums. I shared uneducated opinions. I lied. I pretended. I even manipulated and exploited. I caused real life harm. Many of those websites may be long gone, but some still exist today. Wherever my words should be, so long as they haven’t sunk into the void, I’m sure they could be defined as cringe, if not worse.

Speaking of which…

I sought discourse regarding the “Pokemon Kid” video, but I only found a few shreds of discussion from the time it first came out. The meme fizzled and left so little trace that it was difficult to find even the video itself. However, there were a couple of forum threads I found that demonstrated the early 2000’s response to a video like this.

Exhibit A — PokeGym. This Pokemon Trading Card Game fan site is still regularly updated, which I must commend despite the nature of the forum thread I will be discussing. PokeGym has persisted since 1999 and appears to be central to the Pokemon TCG community. This is no easy feat.

Before we discuss the thread, I want to note that it is obvious that the denizens of this forum, at least at the time, were primarily children. This should be factored into any perspective you might develop over the contents of this thread.

The thread in question, simply titled “Pokemon kid video”, was created by ScythKing in the PokeGym forums. In addition to a dead Google Video link, it reads as follows.

“Anyone seen this? I leave it for you to judge…”

Following that is a series of strange comments. I’ll quote some notable ones here. First, by sdrawkcab, a forum moderator

“stabs eyes with sharp pointy objects Oh No! I can still here it!!!! NOOOO!O!O!!!!!!111!!!”

The next poster, Ancient Pokemon Trainer, brings the context of age to the forefront.

“Good god. I’ll be like… The first emo 11 year old EVER! So many depressing things have happened these last 2 weeks…”

More than one poster mentioned becoming emo, which was certainly more of a novel term at the time.

Another commenter, blastoise1992 (probably also putting age into perspective) posed a question.

“Ok the last question on who want to be a millionare.

Would you rather… A. Watch This B. Have a seizure C. Drink a gallon of bleach. D. Do the above 2………. at the same time.”

The edgelords began to raise the bar with Shadow Zangoose’s comment.

“Things like this are the reson the law prohibits me from owning kittens and/or battery acid.”

Ancient Pokemon Trainer later posted the following, which does contain references to self-harm.

“ya know… I was actualy like hey this kid is pretty cool until about the middle when he starts rubbing his chest… Then I started cutting myself and almost completely chopped of my hand… Yeah the keyboard is pretty “red” right now.”

I only bring up that post in particular to highlight Burninating_Torchic’s absolutely wild response.

“Probably not as “red” as the walls of an innocent’s room are going to be tonight. Or maybe the walls of this kid’s room. He definitely wouldn’t fall under the category of innocent. Not after this video.”

Potential threats of violence aside, the responses are almost entirely insulting without really establishing any reason. It is a very performative discussion in which commenters clearly try to one up each other ad nauseam. It is, in my opinion, absolute cringe.

Exhibit B — The Game Creators, a website which offers game development software, has also been online since 1999. This website also has a forum, and this forum also has a thread from 2006 about “Pokemon Kid”. The thread, titled “Pokemon kid! We all did this once or twice ;)”, and its responses indicate that this is a community of much older posters.

The age of the community members may demonstrate a less performative nature, or at least a more sophisticated and nuanced performance, but the otherwise harmless take in the original post is pretty quickly met with fatphobia. Otherwise, it’s mostly people being too old or too cool for Pokemon. I’ll admit that, despite the few minor criticisms, it was refreshing after reading the PokeGym comments.

Beyond the cringe

While the concerning extent of the PokeGym discourse can be partially explained by kids being kids, it is the sort of “lulzy” degradation that could be seen all across the internet in the mid 2000’s. Things seemed to change for a while, though perhaps not for the best reasons. As the internet began to consolidate around a few large social media websites, content moderation and increasing social pressure kept certain things at bay.

While some have maintained this moderation to an extent, an ever growing number are falling for a false interpretation of the first amendment. Some groups — such as trans people, neurodivergent people, homeless people, furries, and others — never got to experience this reprieve as it remained socially acceptable to ridicule them in these spaces.

The youth of these commenters may even be relevant. Most of them likely grew out of this behavior as things changed, but some simply didn’t. There are certainly influences, or lack thereof, that led to this development, but these are beyond the scope of this article. Regardless, those who did not find their way out of it were pushed to the margins as larger moderated communities were built.

I would argue that some of the worst of this behavior, the hatred and calls for violence, had been generally kept at bay until very recently. However, despite being pushed to the back alleys of the internet, the primordial slime pools of hate from which it was born, this culture persisted beyond its edgy heyday of the mid 2000's. We now see it rearing its ugly head in the real world in frightening ways.

This behavior is what deserves the social isolation of being seen as cringe. Harmful behavior should be shunned and openly mocked until such behavior is corrected. In other words, do not feed the trolls.

Starve them to death.

Mondegreens — What fun can be made!

Let’s ease up for a moment and consider the humor that we can harmlessly derive from the video. I learned a new word in the process of writing this article — Mondegreen!

A Mondegreen is essentially a misheard word. The most recognizable Mondegreens are misheard lyrics in music. There are fairly well known Mondegreens, such as “Excuse me while I kiss this guy” from Jimi Hendrix’s “Purple Haze”. A song sung by a child with an accent in a video with low audio quality is a font of beautiful Mondegreens.

Below are some of my favorite “Pokemon Kid” Mondegreens

“A nude picture lies ahead” for “A new adventure lies ahead”

“I’m hungry dude” for “One hundred new”

“The forces kill Pikachu” for “Of course there’s still Pikachu”

“Aquaman must never get back” for “Aqua, Magma — better get back”

I’ll admit I can see “I’m hungry dude” being a catalyst for fatphobic comments, which leaves a bad taste in my mouth, but I do think it’s sort of funny on its own.

But with that minor reprieve aside, the only thing left is to look at the video in earnest and come to an opinion. Upon doing so, I have to admit I love the video. I love this child’s genuine enthusiasm, I love their dedication, and I’ve found that I truly love their choice of lyrics.

With relatively few minor flaws, this video is charming and entertaining. I hope this child, wherever they may be, sees this as a mark of pride rather than shame. In honor of their contribution to the fandom, I have written my best interpretation of their lyrics below.

A new adventure lies ahead The battle has begun The land of Hoenn brings a brand new player and I’ll be number one

(This part I haven’t been able to decipher let me know in the comments if you have a guess) I’m gonna be a Pokemon master with Ruby and Sapphire.

(Pokemon!) One hundred new Of course there’s still Pikachu

(Pokemon!) The adventure never ends in a world we must defend

(Pokemon!) Aqua, Magma — better get back when my Shroomish starts to attack I know I’ll be at the top of the pack Pokemon!

Note: Please do not try to cause any trouble for the noted posters on PokeGym, should they even still have access to those accounts. Ancient Pokemon Trainer, for example, is at least 30 years old now if they are to be believed. Burninating_Torchic is more likely to be an accountant or something than a criminal. I was worse than any of them, and I managed to eventually find my way out. Leave them be.

My name is Laughlin Marx and we should probably vanquish the forces before they kill Pikachu.