Selena and Yolanda :The Secret Between Them or Not

Selena Quintanilla

I get that biopics often get trashed because they tend to be trash. Because you cannot possibly truly tell someone else’s story in a way that will honor them entirely. That said, 1997 movie Selena starring Jennifer Lopez was an amazing film. I felt like in a rare display of actual elite histrionics that Lopez really became her character. I felt like I understood who Selena was and her artistry as one of the largest Tejano singers in the 1990’s. So shout out to J.Lo for that. It was incredibly sad to see her rapid rise to be fame be shot down literally on May 31,1995.

The story that has dominated has always been Yolanda Saldivar, the murderer was an obsessed fan club president who killed Selena over possible theft. We see the infamous stand off in the red truck with Saldivar holding a gun to her head , distraught saying she didn’t mean to. This actually happened and occurred as a stand off for over seven hours. Saldivar was rightfully found guilty of murder and sentenced to life with a possibility of parole in thirty years. My how time flies because next year is 2025. And Saldivar will go before a parole board who may or may not grant the 63 year old Saldivar parole when she comes before them.

So, I’m a true crime bluff and was excited to see the previews of Selena and Yolanda the Secrets between them. Supposedly there was more to the clear cut murder that the rest of the world didn’t know. We’re introduced to key figures from that time period in Corpus Cristi, Texas and Yolanda’s family, a niece and a cousin. They gave information about Saldivar as a nurse who started out as a fan club member and president for Selena and worked her way up to being a business partner and best friend of the singer. The family’s fond memories painted the single and childless Saldivar as a do-gooder who loved Selena and her family to pieces.. A devoted figure who was interested in protecting and serving Selena and her interests. And I waited for the juicy parts. I waited for the secrets.

In the almost two hours or so, the most I learned was that Selena apparently had an affair with a Mexican doctor while she was married to Chris Perez. I didn’t hear that Selena had a drug or alcohol habit, that she was secretly a nasty mean person, I didn’t hear that she had a secret abortion or that she as so much had domestic violence going on. Now we can clutch our pearls if we want to but an affair is truly not the worst thing in the world. It is not something that we haven’t heard a thousand times about a celebrity. I’d go so far as to say we expect on some levels for celebrities to have salaciousness going on.

For her crime, Saldivar who had been accused of stealing from Selena’s company, had started carrying a gun in the last month before Selena’s death. She had been confronted by Selena and her family weeks prior to Selena’s death. From this meeting, Yolanda was summarily dismissed from their circle.

Now, there is a portion where Selena and Yolanda apparently traveled to Mexico sometime after that meeting where Yolanda was dismissed. This part was the weirdest part to me. Why would Selena travel with the woman who stole thousands of dollars from her? Yolanda kept hinting that “there’s more to the story”. But she never exactly gives more.

May 31,1995.Selena went to the Day Inn Motel that Yolanda was staying at to collect some tax documents. Seemingly when Selena enters the room, an argument begins with Yolanda holding a gun to her head. Selena backed out the room and Yolanda shot her. Reports said that she chased Selena, firing shots and shouted , “Bitch”. Yolanda’s defense is that she didn’t mean it and of course, “ there’s more to the story”.

My impression of this and the lesson truly is that people really have to watch the people who are around them and watch yourselves with other people. In a perfect world, everyone in our circles, in our families , in our vicinities would be rooting for us and wishing us the best . But the harsh reality is that everyone will not be rooting for us and wishing us the best. And we have to find ways to test the loyalty and screen our people for ulterior motives. We have to do profiles of our people and we have to really sit with the vibes that others give us. When people don’t mean you well, you can feel it. Sometimes it could be just a projection or anxiety but other times you can truly feel the energy of people. And that will help you assess if they are the best people to be around you.

And on that same vein, we have to watch ourselves around other people. In a perfect world we would never get jealous, be insecure or hate other people. But the reality is that it is normal to be jealous, to be insecure and even to hate people at different times. Obviously those aren’t positive , desirable qualities or traits to be in and possess. But they are normal and they do happen with frequency. And I say to that , we have to be honest about how others make us feel. In the case of Selena and Yolanda, let’s just be real. A beautiful, young , married loved pop star brimming with success who has a “ friend” who is older, homely, not married or in a relationship who no one glances at twice. Let’s get real. It would be hard for this friendship type to exist. Two women of such extremes could never truly be equally yoked friends. In my opinion. The privilege gulfs are too extreme.

Yolanda Saldivar

I think Yolanda served a specific purpose for Selena. I believe she was a true ride or die who probably would have died for Selena. I believe she functioned as a secondary maternal figure who cleaned up the mess. But I believe somewhere in that space of servitude and devotion, Yolanda had her own demons. I think that she found ways to live through Selena. This is so common with people. You’ll align yourself with someone just because they are so charismatic and so loved just to get that residual treatment. Being Selena’s friend and business partner became Yolanda’s life. So much so that Yolanda saw Selena and Selena’s life as her own. With this break up and the continued rise of Selena,I believe Yolanda feared being discarded. I believe Yolanda feared the loss of her life through Selena. Mental health is key. No one should make anyone else their entire reason for existing . We all have our own stories for a reason. Don’t make yourself a villain for not being someone else.