What a Very Stupid Question

Do dogs offer more satisfying companionship than people?

Really, why bother with such a silly question? (photos by M. Harris)

Bonjour à tous, c’est moi, le chien français. Je suis très désole. There is no excuse; I have not been busy, or particularly energetic of late — much like Mme Macdonald, I sleep, eat, nap, eat and sleep some more. While she has been playing on M. Pierre’s good nature and using her new hip as an excuse not to drag me out for tedious strolls, she refers to as walks, I have been enjoying the company of M. Pierre who, bien sur, is far more interesting and energetic.

Perhaps the one thing I do miss, non, the only thing I miss about the 30 minutes or so of ennui spent with Mme Macdonald is the prospect of inhaling the pieces of stale baguette she produces from her pocket

In fact that is the only thing that prevented me from falling into a deep depression this morning when I heard M. Pierre say to Mme Macdonald that he thought her hip had improved sufficiently that she could now resume her dog walking duties.

I was offended and, I confess, a little hurt. Dogs (especially French dogs and it goes without saying male French dogs) simply offer more satisfying relationships than people do.

I read in a Washington Post article on Mme Macdonald’s computer screen — while she was in the kitchen pretending to cook — that a philosopher who studies such things found that dog owners tend to rate their pets more highly than their human loved ones in areas such as companionship and support.

Not surprisingly they also experienced fewer negative interactions with their dogs than with the closest people in their lives, including children, romantic partners and relatives. Mon Dieu, how could it be otherwise?

Who do you suppose received this sweet treat? Pas mois.

And yet, who received this tasty little Valentine’s day morsel from M. Pierre? I’ll leave you to guess. Suffice to say I was, once again, a little hurt.

And no, it wasn’t me who greedily gobbled down the first bite

Perhaps you have gathered that I’m feeling a little disconsolate this morning so it did cheer me slightly to also read this in the article..

The late primatologist Jane Goodall celebrated her 90th birthday with 90 dogs. She stated in an interview that she preferred dogs to chimps because chimps were too much like people.

Mme Macdonald could have learned a lot from Ms. Goodall. And M.Pierre, as perfect as I find him to be (except for the Valentine cake) could learn a few things from Clive Wynne director of the Canine Science Collaboratory at Arizona State University who, quite correctly, observes that “Dogs (especially French male dogs)are amazingly social beings, so they are easily infected with our warmth and joy.”

M. Pierre’s gaze helped heal my paw

While Mr. Wynn didn’t actually specify French male dogs, I’m sure it was because he didn’t want to alienate Americans with non-French female dogs. I’m sure there must be quite a few of them. And it also pleased me to learn that the benefits of long, loving gaze, between you and your canine companion provide both of you with a boost of oxytocin, a calming hormone associated with love and bonding.

Thankfully, Mme Macdonald has never gazed lovingly into my eyes, nor have I gazed into hers. Perish the thought. It would probably help improve her disposition, though and, in doing so, improve M. Pierre’s quality of life. She really can be rather unpleasant.

Another piece of advice caught my eye. Learn new tricks (even if you’re both old). Obviously, this was directed at Mme. Macdonald. who is old and not at me since I am not at all old. It suggested training your canine to roll over, or catch a Frisbee. I will make it perfectly clear to M. Pierre that if he ever spots Mme Macdonald trying to teach me (as if that were possible) either of those ridiculous activities, I will leave home immediately and never return.

I hope I will not be forced into doing that because I would miss M. Pierre terribly. And, perhaps the prospect of stale baguette pieces from Mme Macdonald’s pocket. Although it would not be enough to make me forgive her for throwing a Frisbee at me.

Why, I wonder, can’t she be like Ms Rhianna Jones, who, on chilly mornings, often makes her dog, Charlie, a cup of warm bone broth. The article goes on to note that Ms Jones sometimes has one, too, although usually she sticks with coffee. The point, though, is that the act of sharing a nourishing beverage strengthens their connection and adds a touch of joy to their mornings.

I’m afraid that Mme Macdonald’s stale baguettes don’t provide quite the same connection. Perhaps M. Pierre might consider a similar routine. I think we’d both enjoy it.

a bientot,

Fred, le chien français