When Things go Sideways in the Classroom

Practical reminders for Educational Leaders when dealing with Dysregulated students

Photo by Steve A Johnson on Unsplash

“ You are gonna die today, Mr. Elliott!” I did not have those words on my Principal’s Bingo card that bright October morning. A very angry and emotionally dysregulated female student held myself and two teachers at scissor point. Funny aside, safety scissors are not considered a weapon unless they puncture the skin. Thankfully they didn’t become a weapon that day.

Law Enforcement was called and the student had to be removed from school. After ten days, the student was scheduled to return to school, but thankfully was placed in a more appropriate setting. This incident and the aftermath was traumatic for everyone involved. I am grateful for the school staff and district for their responses and support.

Unfortunately, this was not my first or only time that I have been threatened with violence at the workplace, and sadly this occurrence happens daily in schools across this country. School Violence is relatively small with over 78% of all schools in North Carolina experiencing less than 5 Reportable Acts each school year.

A Reportable Act is any action or crime that must be reported to Law Enforcement. Most of these involve substance abuse or alcohol and a small percentage involves violence. But one act is too many.

Even though violence in schools is relatively isolated, it still occurs. Fortunately, most students do not escalate to violence when dysregulated, but extreme behavior still impacts the other students, the adults in the class, and the climate of the school.

Mental health is a massive issue in schools and its only growing. Students are coming to school with significant emotional and mental health issues. 1 in 5 students struggle with mental health and depression. Schools are being asked to do more with ever shrinking resources, and it is an unsustainable system. Schools did not create these issues, but somehow we are expected to remedy them.

Remember, one student has the power to disrupt a whole classroom or school, and the responsibility and duty of the principal is to educate everyone.

Below are some ideas to be mindful of if and when you are dealing with a dysregulated student or extreme behavior.

1. Be present and never ask a staff member to be in a situation that you wouldn’t put yourself in. When you hear the call for help, Go! Yes running a school is important, but kids and staff come first. Staff will appreciate the fact that you are willing to get your hands dirty and not stay in your office.
2. Stay calm, and try not to escalate the situation. Students and staff will feed off your energy. I used to sing Grateful Dead Songs to help keep myself and students regulated.
3. Ensure the safety of everyone. The child who elopes from the playground is still your responsibility. The child who is throwing chairs, may have accommodations, but their classmates deserve to be safe.
4. Do what is right for all students. Remove the child from class, when appropriate. Yes, this individual child deserves an education, but not at the expense of every other child in the class. Suspend the child, if necessary. I know that I will get hate for this, but that’s OK. Sometimes a student needs to sent home. I know that this is not a permanent solution, but it is a necessary one.
5. Work with the parents, and be honest about what is going on. Try to present the situation factually, and without emotion if you can. Empathy can go a long way, but it only goes so far. There may not be a solution where everyone wins, or is even happy, but at the end of the day if you are honest and doing what is right and legal, that is all you can do. Work with outside and district agencies to support the student and family.
6. Make a plan and support the teachers who are impacted. Remember that the teacher in the classroom is a person too. In order to manage students who are dysregulated, the staff need to manage their emotions. This is an impossible ask sometimes. The adults in the building are held to a higher standard than students, and rightly so. However, a brain that is in “fight of flight” mode or in a state of dysregulation is the same regardless of age. Listen to their concerns and advocate for them as well. Just because the adults are paid to be there, doesn’t mean that their feelings and needs are any less importatant.
7. Ensure any Crisi or Behavior plan goes beyond these classics; “Relationship Building,” “If Then Charts,” and “Social Stories.” Be specific about what responses will be, and do not be afraid of having suspension as a consequence. Other options could include a change of placement, or modified day, but make sure you follow all state, federal and local rules, policies, regulations and procedures. Here is a sample crisis plan. I know that your district, special education department, or intermediate unit also has examples of crisis and behavior plans as well.
8. Know when it is time to call Law Enforcement. Many schools in the United States have a School Resource Officer (SRO) stationed in the school. The (SRO) is a sworn law enforcement officer whose primary duty is to support school safety and to be a positive influence and resource for students. I have been fortunate to work with some great SRO’s in my career, and maintaining a solid relationship with him/her is key to having a safe school. The decision to contact Law Enforcement should never be taken lightly, and in some instances you are legally bound to call the police and make a report.
9. Ensure that you have a team in place to help support you when extreme behavior occurs. I have been fortunate to have worked with some rockstars who were able to keep a level head in tough situations. You can’t plan for every situation, but having people you can trust is crucial.
10. Take care of yourself. At the school level I know that this all seems impossible, but it is your reality. You are responsible for all students in the building, and you too are human. Make sure you find ways to regulate your own emotions, and do not feel that you have to do everything yourself. Make sure you have someone you can speak to in order to help you debrief and unpack these situations.

I wish all my educator friends love and safety this year. If you need to chat or an unbiased ear, please reach out to me. I love to talk, and love to listen. You got this. Take care of your staff and do what is right for all kids.

Bart

8/6/26

Sources Cited

[embed]EdExplainer | How North Carolina schools support student mental health, and the challenges that… North Carolina takes a comprehensive approach to supporting student mental health, but funding and workforce shortages…www.ednc.org

https://www.carolinajournal.com/new-crime-data-for-nc-public-schools-continues-positive-trend/