More Humor By Bloch 39

Witty Sayings from the book by Bloch

Photo by Omar Lopez on Unsplash

ROMINGER’S RULESFOR STUDENTS:

1. The more general the title of a course, the less you will learn from it.

2. The more specific a title is, the less you will be able to apply it later.

DUGGAN’S LAW OF SCHOLARLY RESEARCH:

The most valuable quotation will be the one for which you cannot determine the source.

Corollary:

The source for an unattributed quotation will appear in the most hostile review of your work.

WHITTINGTON’S FIRST LAW OF COMMUNICATION:

When a writer prepares a manuscript on a subject he does not understand, his work will be understood only by readers who know more about that subject than he does.

Corollary:

Writings prepared without understanding must fail in the first objective of communication — informing the uninformed.

ROMINGER’S RULES FORTEACHERS:

1. When a student asks for a second time if you have read his book report, he did not read the book.

2. Ifdaily class attendace is mandatory, a scheduled exam will produce increased absenteeism. If attendance is optional, a scheduled exam will produce persons you have never seen before.

SIX PRINCIPLES FOR PATIENTS:

1. Just because your doctor has a name

for your condition doesn’t mean he knows what it is.

2. The more boring and out-of-date the magazines in the waiting room, the longer you will have to wait for your scheduled appointment.

3. Only adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.

4. You never have the right number of pills left on the last day of a prescription.

5. The pills to be taken with meals will be the least appetizing ones.

Corollary:

Even water tastes bad when taken on doctor’s orders.

6. If your condition seems to be getting better, it’s probably your doctor getting sick.

MATZ’S WARNING:

Beware of the physician who is great at getting out of trouble.

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