You Come every month and Now You may not at all!

• A woman’s journey on the cycle she has every month.

This is a unique experience for women; none other than us can authentically speak of it. No empathy can make you aware of it; I assure you.

I experienced it for the first time in my teens, and I am still figuring that out in my 40s. Each passing decade of experience with it is different and unique for each of us. Isn’t that an experience worthy of having? All your lifetime, you are perplexed, sometimes joyous, other times angry, and many times apprehensive about it. Can any man boast of such an experience ever? Never! I can assure you.

As I said, in my teens, when I encountered it, I was perplexed; I ran to my all-in-one — My mom; she assured me it’s part of me that I need to understand. I need to be a bit careful with my body, and I was showered with all the care of ayurvedic massages and treatments. I enjoyed them all, only to be woken up by early morning, as my mom was insistent on me taking care of myself before I attended school. She didn’t want to interrupt my school because of that. I have been told that, in earlier times, girls never attended school when they were on it, and some of them discontinued because of it. Thankfully, times have changed, and I continue to live my daily life without knowing much about it. This process has become a monthly thing now, with a bit of discomfort in the legs and tummy; otherwise, it was an ok experience. Still haven’t figured out why I am getting it and its significance. It wasn’t the time of Google, and I wasn’t good at asking questions as well or wasn’t encouraged. The information about it started trickling to me as my classmates experienced it, and there were talks about it in school corridors. Things about it started becoming more apparent and became part of life. Ofcourse, the difficulty of using the cloth and chaffing because of it was a concern.

Once I left home for college, I was introduced to ways to deal with it better, and thus, it got easier.

Then, it all became the center of attraction when some changes started appearing in the body, which were considered abnormal. Some unwanted hairs and some changes in how it occurred each month. Some months, it just wouldn’t come, and thus, the side effects were troublesome. A concept of fear associated with it started cropping up then, as It was associated with pregnancy. Newly married, and such changes were troublesome; on consultation with a doctor, she diagnosed the condition and suggested some medications. Instead, I opted for some alternative medicines and corrected it almost. As I perceived, the changes occurring were accepted as part of growing up, the next phase. Once, it was in my teenage years, and now, in middle age.

Then, my son was nurtured there, and it was a fascinating experience to be part of that process. Things became all the clearer then, and the workings of it and its purpose were identified then.

After he was presented to the world, things did go a bit hayware for almost a year and slowly as the body settled after that major event, so did this also.

Now, all the new versions are showing up. Every month, there’s a new version; sometimes it comes earlier, sometimes later, and sometimes it makes you think, Is it that I am having another child? Can’t be! But lo! it appears with a bang and with all its fireworks. This is my experience of the start of periods in the present years, and 3.95 billion other women walking around can tell you a different story of its start and their journey with it and, ofcourse, the most ceremonious ending of it. However, the ending is considered less celebrated and less taken care of, as any ending is.

So now I am growing up once more, I guess, and there are a lot of new things which it shows me … but the times when I am anticipating it and want to gulp down all the food in the vicinity and the treacherous pains which shows up or the mind going haywire hating everything and especially everyone around. I doubt myself. Why would it be so? And then a feeling of something falling off the belly comes, and it appears ….. everything around becomes brighter and calmer.

I am told I will not have this every month for some years, and I doubt if I might miss it. I feel so. There was some anticipation and drama every month, which was one of the spices of life….