The Devil Is A Welcomed Teacher

On being stuck in the endless pursuit of “security” and then receiving it.

It’s 7:00 a.m.

I walk downstairs after waking up in a plush king-sized bed, wash my face in the double-sink bathroom, and begin another quiet morning in American suburbia.

After exchanging dream analyses with my partner, I shuffle my tarot deck and pull my daily spread.

The Devil card sits bottom left.

Credit: Wild Unknown Tarot Deck by Kim Krans (get my deck)

The Devil (Card XV) in the Major Arcana symbolizes addiction, attachment, limiting beliefs, and feeling trapped by material things or toxic habits.

Every time this card appears, it gives me pause. It used to give me chills.

Traditionally the devil card points out that we have become trapped by our own unconscious patterns and focused on the material world. When I first began reading tarot a few years ago, I’d whine every time it appeared.

“God damn. I’m trying so hard to be conscious.”

For a long time, I assumed I knew what it meant when it’d arrise. Maybe it was because I lived in Los Angeles and had pursued acting in Hollywood. Maybe it was because of my TikTok wellness influencer stint. Maybe it was because I checked my finances too often.

Those explanations all seemed reasonable. But they weren’t actually what the card was trying to teach me.

Materialism, I’ve come to realize, is just the symptom.

The deeper issue is the wound that makes us believe we need something outside ourselves to finally feel enough. That we don’t feel security within.

For a while, I believed the answer was simply having less. I practiced minimalism. Owning fewer things genuinely supported my mental health and reduced decision fatigue. But eventually I realized minimalism also suppressed my creativity. I felt restricted and practical.

I was maintaining a mindset of efficiency over creativity. I had a wardrobe for every occasion, but not enough that I LOVED. And my inner child hated it. She wanted eccentricity. She wanted more options that just were fun. Like the child who refuses to wear jeans and instead rocks a tutu.

The problem wasn’t owning too many beautiful things. The problem was expecting beautiful things to make me feel whole.

So instead, I began collecting more moments of beauty from the source.

More sunrises.

More trees.

More mountain hikes.

The collecting of beauty in nature shifted things for me unknowingly… It shifted my point of focus. I kept living and not punishing myself for accumulating things. I hiked more often and put more attention on how my body felt. More often I felt aware of when I was in a freeing state of being versus feeze.

I was studying somatics before I called it became formal. My priority became learning our body-wisdom.

More often I felt safely held by Mother Earth.

The Devil isn’t pointing to the shopping habit, the overworking, the perfectionism, the endless striving, or even the obsession with status.

It’s pointing beneath them. Toward the insecurity that fuels them.

Toward the belief that whispers:

“Not yet.”

“Not enough.”

“Once I have this, then you’ll start feeling better.”

Whether we’re chasing money, recognition, the perfect relationship, the ideal body, or another accomplishment, we’re often trying to outrun an inner wound. If it was yours and aligned why would it need to be chased. Why not, simply take action and trust it’s coming.

The Devil highlights that we’re running.

In many depictions the Devil is red.

I’ve started thinking of that red less as current danger and more as a stop sign. A warning.

Stop.

Pause.

Turn inward.

Red is also associated with the root chakra, or Muladhara chakra, the Sanskrit term — our energetic center of safety, stability, grounding, and belonging.

That’s where the card had been pointing all along.

Back to the basics.

Back to the body.

Back to the Earth.

Credit: Luna Moon Rising by Mara Friedman (1995)

When I notice myself caught in the story that I need more in order to be enough, I return to grounding.

I meditate. I imagine roots extending from the base of my spine deep into the earth beneath me. I let my body remember something my mind often forgets:

I am supported.

No amount of collecting “nuts” — whether that’s money, status, achievements, or perfection — will ever create the kind of security we’re truly seeking.

Even squirrels gather enough for winter. We think we can gather enough to create inner peace — hah!

Life will always contain uncertainty.

We don’t control tomorrow.

We don’t control the economy.

We don’t control how others perceive us.

But we can cultivate an inner steadiness that allows us to meet uncertainty without being consumed by it.

That kind of security can never be purchased. It can only be practiced.

Maybe today your practice is taking off your shoes and standing barefoot in the grass. Maybe it’s noticing the abundance that’s already present instead of the scarcity your mind keeps rehearsing.

Maybe it’s affirming to yourself:

“I’m no longer living in the circumstances that taught me I wasn’t safe.”

Feel your body being held by something much greater than your fears.

Years ago, I believed consuming less would bring me closer to the divine. It didn’t.

What transformed me wasn’t deprivation. It was connection.

The more deeply I connected within myself, the more things shifted. The Devil’s grasp on me loosened and the Creator broke through. I became generative:

I wanted to create.

To share.

To contribute.

To love.

The Devil offers us a choice every time it appears. It is easy to exist and not choose fulfillment from within. To distract ourselves more and keep moving ahead. What it yields isn’t often ‘bad.’ Sometimes it’s wonderful — it just feels like emptiness.

We continue down the path of “not enough.” Or we can stop and root ourselves. We can feel inner-security, naturally embody the divine, and be creators. Gratitude for the options of paths. Some harder than others. Luckily most circle us back to our wholeness regardless.

Love,

Anisa

P.S. If you’re looking for a simple way to reconnect with your body, I shared a grounding meditation on YouTube.

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