10 Things to Do This Weekend to Scam-Proof Your Parent

Photo by Vitaly Gariev on Unsplash

Most families do not think seriously about phone safety until something frightening happens.

Maybe your mother receives a text that looks like it came from her bank. Maybe your father answers a call from someone claiming to be from “fraud protection.” Maybe a grandparent gets a message saying a package cannot be delivered unless they click a link. At first, these moments can look small. But for scammers, that small moment is often the opening they are waiting for.

The risk is not theoretical. In 2024, people aged 60 and older filed 147,127 complaints with the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center and reported $4.8 billion in losses, the highest complaint count and loss total of any age group. Credit card and check fraud alone accounted for 3,226 complaints and $33.8 million in losses among people over 60.

That is why smartphone safety should not be treated as a technical issue only. For many older adults, the phone is now a bank, a wallet, a family contact book, an email inbox, a photo album, and sometimes the main connection to medical, government, and financial services.

Here are ten practical things you can do this weekend to make your parent’s phone safer.

1. Update the phone before changing anything else

Start with the least dramatic but most useful step: update the phone.

Software updates are easy to ignore because they do not feel urgent. But updates often fix security weaknesses that criminals may try to exploit. If your parent’s phone has not been updated for months, it may be missing important protections.

Sit with them and check the operating system first. On an iPhone, go to Settings → General → Software Update. On many Android phones, the path is usually under Settings → System → Software Update, though the exact wording can vary.

Then check app updates. Banking apps, messaging apps, browsers, email apps, and social media apps should not be left outdated. Turning on automatic updates can remove the need for your parent to remember this every week.

This step alone will not stop every scam, because many scams target people rather than devices. But it closes unnecessary gaps and makes the rest of your safety system stronger.

2. Turn on alerts for bank cards and card spending

Many families focus on scam calls and suspicious links, but the card itself deserves attention too. A scam does not always begin with someone stealing a phone. Sometimes it begins with a small card charge that no one notices until weeks later.

Help your parent turn on alerts for card purchases, ATM withdrawals, online transactions, large charges, failed login attempts, and password changes. Many banks allow these alerts through text, email, or app notifications. The purpose is shorten the time between a suspicious transaction and action.

This matters because speed can affect the outcome. The FTC explains that debit and ATM card losses can grow if a lost card or unauthorized transaction is not reported quickly. Credit card disputes follow different rules, including a written dispute process in certain cases, but the overall principle is the same: the faster a problem is noticed, the faster it can be contained.

A simple family rule can help:

If you see a charge you do not recognize, turn the card off if the bank app allows it, then call the number on the back of the card.

3. Create a family code word for emergency calls

Some of the most painful scams are not technical at all. They are emotional.

A scammer may call pretending to be a grandchild, child, lawyer, police officer, or hospital worker. The story changes, but the pressure is usually the same: someone is in trouble, money is needed quickly, and the older adult is told not to tell anyone else.

This is why a family code word is so powerful.

Choose a simple phrase that only trusted family members know. It should be memorable, but not something a stranger could guess from social media. Then create a rule: if anyone calls asking for urgent money, personal information, or secrecy, they must know the code word.

The code word is especially important now because familiar voices are no longer perfect proof. AI voice cloning and impersonation scams make it easier for criminals to sound convincing. Your parent does not need to become suspicious of every family call. They only need one calm rule for unusual emergencies:

If the call is urgent, emotional, and asks for money, ask for the code word and call family back directly.

4. Teach the “hang up and call back” rule

Scammers often try to trap people inside the conversation. They may say, “Do not hang up,” “Stay on the line,” “This must be handled now,” or “Do not tell your family.” Those instructions are not signs of authority. They are warning signs.

The safest habit is simple:

Hang up and call back using a trusted number.

For a bank, use the number on the back of the card. For a government agency, use the official website or an official letter. For a family member, use the saved contact in the phone.

Banks warn customers that scammers can spoof caller ID, ask for one-time codes, and pretend money needs to be moved to a “safe” account. Wells Fargo and Chase both warn that legitimate banks will not ask customers to share PINs, passwords, or one-time codes, and they will not ask customers to move money to “protect” it.

The practical script for your parent can be:

“I do not handle this on incoming calls. I will call the bank myself.”

5. Put a card-safety reminder in the wallet or phone case

Digital safety does not always have to be digital. A small physical reminder card can be surprisingly effective, especially during stressful moments.

Create a simple card and place it in your parent’s wallet, near the phone, or inside the phone case. It could say:

Before sending money, buying gift cards, sharing a code, or clicking a suspicious link, call one trusted person first.

Then list two or three trusted contacts with phone numbers.

This works because scammers want isolation. They want the older adult to act alone, quickly, and emotionally. A trusted contact card interrupts that pattern. It gives your parent a next step when their mind is crowded by fear or confusion.

Do not make the card too complicated. In an emergency, the best reminder is short:

Stop. Do not pay. Do not share codes. Call family first.

6. Let unknown numbers go to voicemail

Many older adults answer unknown calls because ignoring a ringing phone feels impolite. But scammers rely on that instinct.

Help your parent save important contacts: children, grandchildren, close friends, doctors, the bank, neighbors, and caregivers. Then agree that unexpected numbers can go to voicemail. Real callers can leave a message. Scammers often will not, and even if they do, your parent gets time to think before responding.

This habit is simple, but it changes the balance of power. Instead of reacting under pressure, your parent can listen later, ask someone they trust, and decide calmly.

7. Never share one-time codes, PINs, or passwords

One-time passcodes are one of the biggest sources of confusion for many people. A message may say, “Your verification code is 123456.” Then a caller says, “Please read that code to confirm your identity.” and that is the trap.

The code is not for the caller. It is for the account owner. If your parent reads it aloud, the scammer may use it to log in, reset a password, approve a payment, or take over an account.

Create a family rule that is easy to remember:

Codes are like keys. We never read them to anyone who calls us.

This rule should include:

• Bank PINs.
• Card PINs.
• Online banking passwords.
• Email passwords.
• One-time verification codes.
• Security questions.
• Remote access permission.

8. Use safer payment habits with cards

Payment cards are convenient, but the way they are used matters.

Whenever possible, your parent should use chip or tap/contactless payments instead of swiping. EMVCo explains that contactless chip transactions use a one-time security code for each transaction, and tokenization can replace the real card number with a token for certain payment situations. In simple terms, safer payment rails can reduce exposure of the real card details.

For online shopping, consider using a credit card or trusted digital wallet when appropriate, instead of exposing a debit card connected directly to a checking account. This depends on the country, bank, and your parent’s comfort level, but the general idea is to reduce unnecessary exposure of the account that holds essential funds.

Also teach this rule:

Never give card numbers to someone who called first.

If your parent wants to pay a real bill, they should go to the official website, official app, paper statement, or verified phone number.

9. Review app permissions and remove suspicious apps

Apps often ask for access to the camera, microphone, contacts, photos, location, or files. Sometimes that access makes sense. A maps app needs location. A video call app needs camera and microphone access. But not every app needs everything.

Sit with your parent and review permissions together. Look especially at apps they do not recognize, games, cleaning apps, coupon apps, flashlight apps, or apps that were installed after a strange phone call or pop-up warning.

Ask a simple question:

Does this app really need this access?

If the answer is no, turn the permission off. If the app is unfamiliar or unnecessary, remove it.

This should not be done in a controlling way. The goal is to help your parent understand the phone as a private space. Just as they would not give a stranger the keys to their house, they should not give unnecessary access to apps they do not trust.

10. Make a calm emergency plan before anything happens

The worst time to create a fraud plan is after someone has already clicked a link, shared a code, or sent money. In that moment, people feel embarrassed, scared, and rushed. That is why the plan should be written before there is a crisis.

A basic emergency plan can be short:

1. Stop replying to the message or caller.
2. Do not enter more information.
3. Take screenshots if possible.
4. Call a trusted family member.
5. Call the bank using the number on the card.
6. Lock or replace the card if needed.
7. Change important passwords.
8. Report the scam through the proper official channel.

The most important part is emotional, not technical:

If something happens, tell us quickly. You will not be blamed.

Shame and silence helps scammers. A calm family response can prevent a bad situation from becoming worse.

Final thoughts

Scam-proofing a parent’s phone is not about making them afraid of technology. It is about helping them use technology with more confidence.

The best protection is a family system: update the phone, slow down urgent decisions, verify bank contacts through the card number, protect passwords and codes, use safer card habits, and agree on what to do when something feels wrong.

These ten steps are a strong weekend starting point. But they are still only a starting point.

Recommended resource

While researching this topic this week, I came across The Caregiver’s Guide to Smartphone Safety, and I went through it.

What I liked about it is that it explains the science behind scams, not just the usual advice like “don’t click suspicious links.” It shows the bigger picture in a simple way, covering fake calls, text scams, phishing links, email fraud, social engineering, family safety systems, and what to do after a scam attempt.

Reading it can help you understand how scammers think and how they pressure people into making quick decisions. That kind of awareness can help you stay one step ahead of them.

If you want a fuller step-by-step system that you can work through with an older parent, this guide is worth reading.

You can get it here: https://noahbennett7.gumroad.com/l/practical-guide-to-smartphone-safety