The Emotional Math of a Working Woman

Mental Prisms

A coach once told me that every person lives through different mental prisms.

The prism of being:

• a mother,
• a working professional,
• a daughter with aging parents,
• a wife,
• a woman trying to hold herself together while managing everything around her.

For years, I think my wall of prisms was made of three things: shame, guilt, and fear.

Constant guilt for my child.

Am I doing enough for him? Am I spending enough time with him? Am I reading enough books to him? Am I giving him healthy food? Am I giving him the right values, culture, and parenting?

Then shame.

Shame for not keeping up with friends. Shame for not being socially available enough. Shame for not being the same carefree girl I once was. Shame while traveling for work. Shame while enjoying time with my husband and leaving my child with parents. Shame for wanting space for myself.

And fear.

Fear of aging parents. Fear of being judged by society. Fear of not being enough anywhere. Fear that no matter how much I did, someone would still find me lacking.

For four years, I kept functioning like this — managing work, home, family, emotions, responsibilities — while carrying this invisible emotional overload every day.

Then one sentence changed something inside me.

“You do not have to be perfect. You have to be present.”

That stayed with me.

If I sit with my child out of guilt, he will feel the guilt more than the love. If I work out of fear, my energy will never feel fulfilling. If I constantly compare myself with other mothers, daughters, wives, or professionals, I will always feel behind.

Now I am slowly learning something different.

Be fully present for one hour instead of physically available all day but emotionally exhausted. Work sincerely for those 9 hours instead of carrying guilt throughout them. Spend one meaningful weekend with parents instead of feeling guilty every single day. Allow relationships to breathe without measuring myself constantly.

I am learning to become a mother. I am learning to become a daughter in a new phase of life. I am learning to become this newer version of myself.

I do not need to be perfect.

But if I can stay emotionally present, emotionally regulated, and emotionally available — maybe that is enough. Maybe that is what my child, my parents, my husband, and even I truly need.

And maybe… I am already doing better than I think I am.

Thank you, Rituu A Saraswat Mindset Coach , for teaching me this. #WorkingMothers#MentalLoad#EmotionalWellbeing#ParentingJourney#WorkingWomen#MindfulParenting