Self-Discovery

Surviving a Lousy Boss

The hidden lessons

Photo by Markus Winkle from Pexels

We’ve all had a lousy boss. Painful? Yes. But even the worst can be full of lessons if you pay attention.

Typical issues with poor leaders

It’s tempting to see a bad boss as wasted time, but every experience offers something to learn. The key is knowing when to adapt, when to stay, and when it’s time to move on.

With more than 40 years in the workplace, I’ve seen many “leaders” fall short. Common traits of a lousy boss include:

• Micromanaging
• Rudeness, belligerence, or bullying
• Ignoring employees or being aloof
• Indecisiveness and vagueness
• Never being satisfied, perfectionistic
• A lack of trust
• Fear rooted in insecurity, poor self-image, lack of confidence, inexperience, or personal issues

Calling them “poor bosses” feels too polite. Let’s be honest and call them what they are, lousy bosses.

The lousy boss

I’ve been fortunate to work for some great leaders and a couple that were downright terrible. As a GM, VP, and President, I also managed many leaders myself. When you’re the boss’s boss, or the boss of the boss’s boss, you see far more than when you’re simply reporting upward.

While there are many varieties of lousy bosses, three common types stand out: those who are too involved, those who are absent, and those who are just plain mean.

“Never Waste a Good Opportunity to Learn from a Bad Boss” — Edie Rosenthal, PhD

Let’s look at what we can learn from each of the three.

The micromanager

Micromanagers, those leaders who over-manage their employees, often stall in their careers. While that may not bother them, it can make life miserable for the people they lead.

What drives their behavior? Usually, insecurity and distrust. They’re so worried about how their superiors view them, or about not meeting expectations, that everything becomes about protecting themselves and not leading their team.

You might win them over if you earn their confidence. However, unless something drastic happens, they seem to rarely change. Your only real options are usually to accept their style, hope for change, or find another place to work.

The uninvolved or uncaring boss

An uninvolved boss can be just as frustrating as a micromanager. They can waffle on decisions and leave employees stranded, and often only survive by leaning on the efforts of harder-working people around them.

As with some other lousy bosses, they can sometimes be “untouchable” because of connections, family ties, or favoritism. Detached from their responsibilities, they often do the bare minimum.

You won’t change them, but you might win their favor. If you want to, that is. The best one can do is decide whether to adapt, hope for change, or move on.

The rude boss

This might be the worst of the bunch. Rude bosses often act superior, belittle others, or bully employees into submission. They should never be allowed to lead, yet in some industries, they not only survive, they thrive.

Will they eventually get caught and removed? Maybe. Maybe not. There is always a chance they will be found out and let go, or they may remain in place for some time. Either way, you’ll have to choose: put up with them, patiently hope and wait for a change, or go elsewhere.

Final thoughts

“Having a bad boss isn’t your fault. Staying with one is.” Nora Denzel

If you’re stuck with a lousy boss, tread carefully. Going over their head or to HR can backfire, since organizations often protect the leaders they’ve hired. The risk could be your job.

In the end, you have a choice. Work should be a place where you’re productive and fulfilled, not miserable. Since you’ll spend about a quarter of your life there, why not choose an environment where you can thrive?

The world is full of opportunities if you devote the time to preparing for them. What better time to learn, grow, and become more than when you are faced with difficult situations? You can do it if you want. In the end, you get to choose, so why not choose what is best for everyone in the long run?

Please note this is general advice based on experience and opinion. If your company has an HR department, you can always consult with them before making big decisions. If not, seek trusted counsel and proceed cautiously.

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