Dear Abba…

Keep me here all my life.

Ihave been away from this writing space for a minute, but while thinking about finding my way back, I thought to pour out my heart in gratitude to you.

It’s so easy to anticipate when the next prayer point will be ticked off my list, without intentionally appreciating you for the ones you have already answered.

I remember asking you to help me in an examination I had to take. For some reason, I felt tense about it. I journaled to you about it with the score I wanted. When the result came out, I had the exact score I trusted you for. I fell on my knees and thanked you. I knew it had nothing to do with my ability to prepare, but your mercy. I put my trust in you, and you did not fail.

It was barely twenty-four hours when “unto the next…” was what my heart whispered. How? Just a few hours before that, I received one of the things I asked you for, and I could not sit in constant gratitude for an entire day. I was already thinking of the other things on my list. Like an alarm in me, I immediately felt the need to thank you over and over again.

I want to be that daughter who showers you with gratitude as often as possible. I know that is who you want me to be. You are not an Automated Teller Machine, where I am only concerned with collecting things. You are my reward. You are my portion. No wonder David said;

Lord, you are my portion and my cup of blessing; you hold my future.

Psalms 16:5 (CSB)

I really love how David spoke with a sacred assurance and confidence. None of the things I receive from you should replace you. You are my portion and my cup of blessing. You are the one who holds my future.

Thank you, ABBA.

Thank you so much for all that you are to me. Thank you for always drawing me to yourself. You are a very safe space, and I do not take you for granted. Thank you for blessing me with amazing people. In the past few weeks, I have seen people reach out to check in on me, to make sure I am fine. I do not see this as one of those things.

Thank you for your mercy. I would not be anything without your mercy. How you do it, I’m not quite sure words can capture that, but you are CONSISTENT in all your ways. That is why I am learning to give thanks in all seasons, no matter what happens.

Until gratitude becomes an attitude or lifestyle, it is not entirely true, because until then, it depends on the state of things. This does not dispute the fact that there are times it seems easy and at other times, a bit difficult. Well, that is not an excuse, because it is you that works in me both to will and to do of your good pleasure. What a solid premise to stand upon to be, and do all you want me to!

Before I put a final full stop, I want to thank you for the things you have planned for me that I am yet to walk into physically. For that beautiful future, thank you. Whilst I walk hand in hand with you, I cannot but pause and take a close, loving look at you as I mutter, ‘Thank you, ABBA.’ You are the best. This is where I always want to be — in gratitude, not in complaints or worries. I have one request: that you keep me here all my life.

Give thanks to the Lord, because he is good; his love is eternal. (Psalm 136:1, Good News Translation)

Photo by Dmitry Rodionov on Unsplash

Your beloved daughter forever,

Abba’s Shiloh.