Hagar: As an Egyptian fleeing to Egypt

I always have to restrain myself, I ask God to help me. This one was just bubbling — I had to share. I was reading Genesis 16. I realized that when Hagar was sent away by Sarai when she was pregnant, she was on her way back to Egypt. This is very profound because Hagar was an Egyptian. She was fleeing. Fleeing to where? Egypt. But she was an Egyptian. Fleeing from Sarai. Why? She was treated harshly. Why was she treated harshly? Because she despised Sarai. Why did she despise Sarai? Because she was pregnant and Sarai was barren. Jews apparently (custom or otherwise) believe Hagar was Pharaoh’s daughter. For all intents and purposes, Hagar was an Egyptian princess, but a slave in Abram’s household. This is what got me — she was running away from slavery back to being a princess in Egypt. She was an Egyptian running back to Egypt. This is personal to me, sorry guys, I can only share so much. Wah! But she was not happy with the outcome of the situation. Hope you guys see it. Hagar was an Egyptian fleeing back to Egypt. How do I know? Genesis 16:7: But the Angel of the Lord found her by a spring of water in the wilderness, on the road to Egypt by way of Shur. She wasn’t happy going back home, as it were. But the Angel found her. Then, honestly I battle with such questions every time I pray and just end up crying because of the intensity and meaning, the punch the question holds. I don’t even know whether to cry or laugh. Like, wait a minute, why would the Angel ask Hagar this question: “Hagar, Sarai’s maid, where did you come from and where are you going?” And she said, “I am running away from my mistress Sarai.” Goodness gracious. Where did you come from? Wasn’t Hagar from Egypt? She was an Egyptian princess (Pharaoh’s daughter — purely on customs of Jews). Where are you going? Wasn’t she going back to Egypt? According to what is written, the Angel said, “Hagar, Sarai’s maid.” Then the question was asked: “Where did you come from?” Wasn’t Hagar from Sarai’s house? “Where are you going?” Wasn’t Hagar going towards Egypt? Hagar bound herself to the words spoken by the Angel who met her. That’s why she responded, “I am running away from my mistress Sarai.” Because otherwise, she could have said she is from Egypt, she is going back to Egypt. What did this show me? Hagar was reminded her identity first, then her response could only be within the boundaries of that identity. And that response is what gave her the direction she needed to take next — not on the road to Egypt by way of Shur, but back to her mistress and submit humbly to her authority. And then all the promises were told to her about her son etc etc. What was explosive to me was that Hagar was an Egyptian and she was going back to Egypt. But she was sad about it. Many things around this text, but the fact that the Angel mentioned her as Sarai’s maid after He called her name is quite telling. He knew her by name, but Hagar was not asked, “Who are you and where are you going?” The Angel said, “Hagar,” then “Sarai’s maid.” It shows me that I am first who I am before what I do. Hagar was Hagar before being Sarai’s maid. And evidently to Hagar, God was with Abram and Sarai, and she would have rather been in that house where God is than be in the house where God isn’t. And Hagar had a choice to make — continue back to Egypt or return to where Abram and Sarai were. At times a person can be in so much pain like Hagar that even when a person appears out of nowhere and calls them by name, they don’t shtuka, like how do you know my name? But there is a peace that comes when talking with God about anything. Imagine — just like in the Garden of Eden, God asked Adam, “Where are you? Who told you…?” He never accuses anyone of anything. He invites everyone to face their reality, and that is where healing, direction, provision, forgiveness, whatever a human soul may need — comfort, counsel — so that the journey starts from that reality to restoration, positioning, etc etc. This is so good to me. What hit me was like — Hagar was an Egyptian going back to Egypt, why wasn’t she sad? Because she was pregnant, and what she carried was a Jewish child and would not have had meaning to the Egyptians as much as it would where she was. But who knows the ways of God? Maybe it could have, maybe not. What a mystery!

If any of this stirs something in you, I invite you to pray. Just be honest before the One who calls you by name. Let Him ask you those questions: “Where have you come from? Where are you going?” Maybe in answering, you will hear the direction you’ve been longing for.