Personality

The 4 Types of People You Meet at Singles Events

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The fluorescent lights of a hotel ballroom can rarely feel kind, but during a single-and-mingle event, they can feel particularly exposing.

After years of swiping through a digital catalog of faces that never materialize in real life, you might find yourself doing the unthinkable: signing up to join singles events.

Megan Weks, a dating and relationship coach, sees the increase in in-person dating options as a sign that the dating culture is shifting. “There is so much hope for commitment-minded singles, as motivated entrepreneurs are inspired to create opportunities for single people to meet the one,” she told Mashable.

Standing there with a cold mocktail and a “Hello, My Name Is” sticker peeling off your blazer, you will quickly realize that even outside dating apps, the archetypes remain. The human experience of looking for love in the wild, away from the safety of the ‘Undo’ button, is condensed into high-stakes social theater.

If you’ve never braved a singles event, you will learn that you aren’t just meeting people; you are navigating a predictable ecosystem of personalities.

From the high-powered interrogator to the person who appears to be waiting for a bus to take them literally anywhere else, here are the four types of people you’re bound to meet at your next singles event — and how to deal with them:

What Are the Different Types of People Who Join Singles Events?

1. The “Interview” Specialist

This person isn’t necessarily cold, but they’re often the one who has spent years dating only to find out that their partner doesn’t want kids, has no plans for their career, or doesn’t believe in marriage.

Their interrogation is their trauma response to wasted time. By posing difficult questions up front, they are preventing future heartbreak. While their efficiency is admirable, it can also be a romance killer.

How to handle them: When you notice them getting more fixated on their questions, you can pivot by gently acknowledging the intensity, like:

“You seem to know exactly what you’re looking for. I usually save my credit score for the third date. Can we start with something lighter — like what’s the best thing you’ve eaten tonight?”

2. The Reluctant Participant

This is the person who has their body turned to the exit, is constantly checking their watch, or is always leaning against the bar as if it’s the only thing keeping them upright.

They treat singles events like dentist appointments. They’re either always prepared with a disclaimer, like how their friend made them attend, or they make fun of the icebreaker games to bond with you.

But here’s the thing: everyone in that room is in the same boat. By loudly expressing their skepticism, they’re just hiding how much they also want a connection.

How to handle them: Don’t join them by also being cynical. Instead, pierce their shield with kindness, saying, “I get that these events can be awkward, but hey, since you’re already here, what’s the one thing that makes this night fun for you?”

Remind them that it’s okay to be seen trying and connecting with people sometimes.

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3. The Serial Mixer or “The Pro”

This person is typically someone who has attended enough singles events to develop a ‘thick skin’ and a charming facade with stories that sound a little too good and punch lines that land perfectly.

Watching them work the room is impressive, but it can also make you realize that you aren’t having a conversation — you’re participating in a focus group. This person can lose the ability to stay present because their eyes are scanning their surroundings, always optimizing.

How to handle them: If they tell you a polished story about their job, ask them something totally unrelated, like, “What’s a secret hobby you have that would surprise everyone in this room?”

You can also point out the ‘pro’ vibe playfully: “You seem like you’ve got this down to a science. How many of these things have you attended? Have you met anyone special yet?”

4. The Deep Diver

While The Interviewer is looking for facts, The Deep Diver is looking for a soul. They believe that if they can find your ‘core,’ they can avoid the three-month dating rule nonsense.

In a world of superficial swipes, meeting someone who actually cares about your inner world is great but also intoxicating. You may share your deepest secret with them, but you will also realize you don’t know if they are nice to waiters, if they have a job, or if they truly like you. Maybe it was all just the intensity of the moment.

Sharing your soul with a stranger is similar to starting with the roof when building a house. It appears impressive, but nothing is holding it up, so be cautious.

How to handle them: Don’t be afraid to slow them down by saying, “I love that we’re connecting, but can we cover the basics for a bit? What do you do for fun, and how did you prepare for this event?”

Great chemistry doesn’t always mean a ‘match’ in terms of lifestyles.

At the end of the night, when the name tags are all faded and the tables are put away, we’re all just people trying to bridge the gap between ‘stranger’ and ‘someone special’. Whether you were the interview specialist or the person hiding by the exit, you did the one thing most people are too afraid to do: you showed up.

Singles events can be messy, awkward, and exhausting, but they are also one of the only places where genuine connection thrives.

So, the next time you see one of these types of people, give them — and yourself — a chance. After all, the most interesting person in a room is usually the one who isn’t afraid to be themselves.

References

Hessekiel, Sophie. 2024. “Dating app fatigue has led to a flurry of IRL singles events.” Mashable. https://mashable.com/article/dating-app-fatigue-has-led-to-a-flurry-of-irl-singles-events.

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