A Student’s Story of Bullying and Anxiety

By Luzmaria De Jesus Ponce, Energy Convertors x Lodestar Fellow

🛑 When I was 5 years old, I was introduced to a whole new school system. In pre-K, it was just nap time, reading, and learning how to make friends. Kindergarten was so new to me that students started bullying me and calling me names, but my teacher never really did anything. She just thought it was kids teasing. That teasing was very harmful to my mental health, but since I was a child, I never realized it hurt me so much.

🤝 Even when the bullying got worse, I gained a friend who supported me and knew what it felt like to be ignored and secluded. She was the only one who taught me how to speak English and taught me how to do math more easily. I felt safe during school because of her. I never felt safe around teachers since they always pressured me and didn’t let me take my time.

The Problem

🛑 The problem was that I didn’t know the school system and didn’t know who to reach out to when I needed help. Every time I got bullied, I tried to tell a teacher, but they just ignored it. They always claimed it was nothing and that the other kids were trying to be my friend. The teachers always talked about stopping bullying and how bullying is unacceptable, but they really didn’t do anything about it.

🛑 When the bullying got worse, my mental health got worse. It caused me to have anxiety every time I tried to do something, especially in middle school. When I talked about my anxiety, teachers thought I was lying and just wanted attention. They never did anything about it until it affected my grades. That is when they told me to see a counselor.

Why It Matters

This matters because this doesn’t just happen to me. It happens to everyone who tries to reach out. So many students in Oakland are getting bullied and need help with their anxiety. When they try to talk to an adult about it, the adults just ignore them, even if those same adults talk about anti-bullying. Some adults in the school system only really care about your grades. If they notice your grades are dropping, they want to help you with everything. Not when you actually reach out for help.

This needs to change because there should be no students who are afraid to speak out. If students become afraid to speak out, schools will ignore it even more. If schools really care about anti-bullying and mental health, why are they not doing anything? This needs to change for the better.

Recommendations for Change

One change schools could make is to offer counseling for bullying a bit earlier in middle school or late elementary school, because those were the times I needed this support the most. Nowadays, there are schools that offer counseling, which is amazing, but I have heard (and experienced) that some counselors were really rude or didn’t care about their students. Schools should sometimes conduct background checks on the people they hire so that there aren’t any problems in the future. No matter what, people should never be rude to kids who need help or advice from someone they know they can trust.

My experience shows that schools need to find ways to help students, no matter what grade or school they are in. Schools need to have more awareness around students being bullied and suffering with mental health. If they find a way, there would be students who would open up and ask for help more easily. Students won’t feel scared to speak out, like they are being too loud or too dumb.