THE MOODY MAVEN COSPLAYS SOCRATES

What Exactly is a “Boob”?

The mansplaining mafia clears things up

Photo by www.kaboompics.com at Pexels

Mansplaining is just one of those things. Ya know?

It’s out there, slithering around, silently, waiting to pounce. To say it’s everywhere would be an understatement. Though to say it’s in every man would be giving it way too much credit.

But for me, I hate mansplaining so much that I sometimes get afraid that I could will myself to see it when it isn’t really there at all. And I never ever want to call attention to something that isn’t really there.

That said, I am not shy about pointing it out when I see it, and certainly not when I experience it.

Given all that, I am sometimes still a little surprised falling for a mansplaining jump scare.

You see, a few weeks ago I posted a story talking about my boobs and my boundaries. Many of us have felt this boobs/boundaries dilemma, I’m sure. The post did fairly well with attention and sparked some good comments.

[embed]On Being the Barer of Good Boobs Most of us want to put our best foot forward, sometimes life has other ideasmedium.com

I’s like to talk about one exchange, a sort of slow motion jump scare. He popped aboard and got to his point right out of the gate…

He said — The word “boob” has become the current usage standard. It trivializes a vital organ that has a specific function in the survival of mankind. Breasts are difficult to hide or disguise, and sometimes difficult to bear. If those facts became customary,, then men looking at women’s breasts would be less of a social issue.

See how he fell right into a -splaining tone? And notice he called my boobs “vital organs,” and how they had a “specific function.” Immediately, I’m charmed.

I said — I’m not sure why you say the word “boob” trivializes anything. I would never try to disguise or hide my boobs. And I know there are millions of years of inertia behind every stolen glance.

He said — “Boob” means stupid or ignorant person or a mistake. The slang “Boob” carries the reference, and that’s why I say it trivializes women’s breasts. Modern women are always on the lookout for language that demeans them. This is one case of it.

At that point I thought I might do a little -splaining of my own.

I said — I have never thought of myself as looking for offense, although i do consider myself modern! “Boob,” like a lot of words, has different meanings and different origins. When I say boobs referring to my breasts, I am using the English origin of bubble — “boo” and “bubby” are steps. When someone uses boob as a dumb guy, they are using the Spanish origin, or bobo.

He said — OK, you win. Boobs it is. However, given the reverence men have for those delightful appendages, I think they deserve a more respectful nomenclature. Until that comes along…boobs they are.

At lease we went from “vital organs” with “specific functions,” to “delightful appendages.” But notice all that is framed around “male reverence” and what my dear mansplainer considers to be “respectful nomenclature.”

At last! My boobs have nomenclature!

I said — Could I ask you a personal question? If you don’t want to say it’s okay. Are you a man or a woman? Either way, I wrote this some time ago…

[embed]Me, My Boobs, and I We are all about team workmedium.com

He said — My breasts are there only because nature had to be consistent. I hope that circumlocution answers your gender question. I liked “My Boobs and I” I’m a bit snobbish. I’m attracted to women who use “breasts” when referring to their boobs. In intimate situations, a woman doesn’t have to call them anything, just make them available for adoration.

So he’s a guy, confirmed. But the tone was a giveaway from the fucking get.

So let me say, sorry I am not that woman who only refers to her boobs as breasts, like some bonnet-wearing butter-churning trad girl. In fact, I don’t think I’ve worn a bonnet in like — oh — three or four generations.

And did he really say that I shouldn’t speak, just make my boobs available? Oh no, please tell me he didn’t go there!! Yeah, he did!

Like I said, I am not really a fan of tossing about the word “mansplaining.” It seems to me that it is an overused word. Just because a man might correct me doesn’t necessarily mean he is mansplaining to me.

I mean, I MIGHT be wrong. And if he knows better, he is welcome to tell me. I’m a big girl. I can take it.

But a guy telling me that I shouldn’t use the word “boobs” because I should be offended by the word “boobs” is kind of a smack dab on target definition of mansplaining.

And finally, adding insult to injury, he came in to correct me, engaged with me, and then didn’t even leave me a single fucking clap. The nerve!!

Typical man…