The Hijab you can’t see

Photo by Amood Oyindamola on Unsplash

A fully covered sister posting her outfit for clout, versus an uncovered sister who speaks with gentleness and guards her tongue fiercely. Who is more modest?

Last time we talked about the Niqab and marriage, today, let’s go deeper;

Modesty in Islam is called “haya” and it covers every part of you, not just your body. The hijab veils your tongue, your gaze, social media, character and intentions. Come with me let’s unpack each of these, together.

The tongue:

The modesty of the tongue goes beyond avoiding lies.

It’s the gossip you choose not to repeat. The comment you typed and deleted. The conversation where you spoke well of someone who hurt you.

That silence? That’s haya too.

Have you ever just sat with a person chit-chatting and all your conversation was just talking about somebody? Their looks, how they appear in class, their confidence, their behaviour?

That quiet place you sit talking about them, that moment, if they were to appear,how would you feel? Embarrassed right? That is what exactly modesty asks you to stop. The hijab shields what you say.

What you say should reflect your hijab. Don’t get involved in vulgar speeches. Say that which is modest. Don’t use your tongue to humiliate others. Do not use your tongue to gossip about others. Just as our beloved prophet(peace and blessings be upon him) mentioned ; “whoever believes in Allah and the last day should speak what is good or keep silent”. So let your hijab influence your speech.

The gaze:

Wait for a second, did you find yourself staring at him because he got a broad chest, a chiseled jaw? did you? that lingering gaze, right?

That gaze, that’s what modesty protects you from. It tells you if you look once by accident, don’t look at that end again. Lower it, look down, don’t stare after the first glance.

Here is what nobody told you, lowering your gaze protects you from many things. it protects you from falling to sin, because obviously that long stare can lead you to sin.

Lowering the gaze is not only attributed to our physical daily lives, it’s not consuming content online that corrupts the heart.

That feed that pops up from nowhere, that reel that’s pulling you to it. That too, you need to lower your gaze. Don’t click on it, don’t zoom, don’t even stop. You can probably scroll with two of your hands just to pass that.

That protects you from falling for that reel or picture. Your heart needs to be sound, my dear sister.

Social Media:

The contradiction of covered sisters seeking validation online through likes and followers.

You see sisters in full cover creating reels and pictures mimicking nasheeds. A sister in niqab takes a picture that is so close to the eyes, and she stylishly kind of close the eyes and then post that online with a caption. And in comment section you see comments on that photo that are very humiliating for a covered sister to receive. All in the name of, “But I’m fully covered”.

Does being fully covered ever give us the freedom to display ourselves online. Especially with those zoom snaps just right at our eyes, winking?

Dear sister, that urge of wanting to post online too, that whisper of wanting to be seen, to be liked and followed online, it’s real. Especially as women, we naturally want to be seen, validated to feel “good”.

However, each time you resist that urge of taking that snap, each time you resist the feeling of creating and editing that real, that? Is modesty too.

Character and Intentions:

This is modesty of the character. Humility, not bragging, not seeking attention, even in halal ways.

Your character is what speaks for you. You don’t speak of it. Your goodness, kindness, patience and humility will talk for themselves if they carry value.

Your aunt came over the weekend and you volunteered to do the dishes throughout that weekend, when you never did. You do so because you want aunt to say, ‘wow, that’s so kind of you’.

You volunteered to organize a community project to clean the local masjid every Thursdays. You do it because you want the entire community to say you’re hardworking and respectful.

You decided that today you’ll cook iftar and give it to a neighbor. But you want the neighbor to thank you endlessly and praise you.

Are your deeds really for Allah?

Did you ever sit down to question the sincerity of your deeds?

Your hijab is more than that veil, it’s your character you display in your daily life. Each time you cancel a project because you doubt your sincerity yet, each time you do it for Allah alone without expecting anything in return, that too is modesty of your character reflected by the Hijab.

Remember that fully covered sister and that uncovered sister we started with? Is modesty something you wear, or something you live?

Dear sister, audit not just your wardrobe but your words, your scrolling habits, and your intentions.