Game of Creams

Photo by Jess Bailey on Unsplash

Crème pâtissière, crème diplomat, crème mousseline, crème chiboust, and crème chantilly; these are one of the most important creams in French pastry world.

If the “Game of Thrones” characters were the creams; Jon Snow would be crème pâtissière, Tyrion Lannister would be crème diplomat, Cersei Lannister would be crème mousseline, Daenerys Targaryen would be crème chiboust and Arya Stark would be crème chantilly.

Only one of them can get the Iron Throne — spoiler alert — or none of them; let’s see why and how…

Crème Pâtissière

As known as Jon Snow. Just like Jon; he is the king of the creams, he is the original one but he doesn’t know anything.

You need 300g (10.5 ounces) whole milk, 1 vanilla pod, 80g (2.8 ounces) egg yolk, 50g (1.7 ounces) sugar, 20g (0.7 ounces) flour, and 20g (0.7 ounces) corn starch to make one fine Jon Snow.

First press vanilla pod with the side of the knife to flatten and then cut in half with office knife. Remove all the seeds and add in a saucepan with all the milk — including the pod itself. Add one-third of the sugar in milk and two-third on the egg yolks. Bring milk slowly to high heat. Whisk egg yolks with sugar (blanch) then add sifted flour and corn starch; keep whisking. When the milk is hot, temper (to avoid cooking eggs) one-third of them with egg yolks — don’t forget the sift milk first — and put all of them back to the milk pan. Bring to boil while whisking vigorously.

The mixture first will have a thicker texture — almost impossible to whisk — then it will have a more smooth — liquid — texture. Immediately remove to another — cold and flat — container to cool it down properly. Cover on top with cling film to avoid lumps on the surface. When it’s cooled down, you can whisk gently again in a big bowl and it will be ready to use.

Crème Diplomat

Tyrion Lannister, the hand of the ruler — whoever it is — with a little bit of alcohol problem.

Simply, crème diplomat is crème pâtissière plus Cointreau (liqueur).

When your crème pâtissière is ready, add 10g (0.35 ounces) Cointreau — or 20 grams — and whisk. Then add 300g (10.5 ounces) whipped cream and gently mix with a spatula. Voilà!

Crème Mousseline

Cersei Lannister, dangerous woman with dangerous ingredients.

Crème Mousseline is crème pâtissière plus butter and optional alcohol — let’s say time to time; for example, when you’re psychopath son poisoned by his own crème diplomat or you think so.

Before adding into the crème pâtissière leave your 150g (5.3 ounces) butter outside to bring to room temperature. Cut in small cubes to whisk easily. Whisk on a bain-marie and add some alcohol (Kirsch) if you have a problem in your life. Because according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.

Crème Chiboust

Daenerys Targaryen; the First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Seven Kingdoms, the Mother of Dragons, the Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, the Unburnt, and the Breaker of Chains.

She was always obsessed with leaving a legacy behind her, just like great pastry chef Monsieur Chiboust. She was as complex as possible just like crème chiboust.

Crème Chiboust is crème pâtissière plus 3 pieces of gelatine — probably made from dragons — and Italian meringue.

Put your gelatine pieces in ice water one by one. Don’t add sugar to your crème pâtissière recipe because it will get enough sugar from an Italian meringue. When your crème pâtissière is ready, before transferring to a cold container add 3 pieces of gelatine inside of it — squeeze well to remove any excess water. Whisk again until gelatine is solved and let it cool just like regular crème pâtissière.

For Italian meringue, boil 170g (6 ounces) sugar with 40g (1.4 ounces) water in a saucepan until you reach the soft-ball stage (118 Celsius degree or 245 Fahrenheit).

Whisk 120g (4.2 ounces) egg whites in a machine bowl briefly and add sugar on top while whisking. Put them on Kitchenaid or any other mixer at high speed until it gets cold and has the texture of a firm peak. Mix your Italian meringue with crème pâtissière in steps with a spatula gently. And — if you do it well — maybe you will end up with a queen without any legacy at all.

Crème Chantilly

Arya Stark, the third child of Ned and Catelyn Stark, the girl with no name, master of the needle, and lady of the Winterfell — almost.

Actually, it’s just whipped cream with a little bit of icing sugar. Soft — inside and out — just like Arya. But if you whipped too much it will become so stiff and tough — just like Arya.

François Vatel — cook for Chantilly Castle — is often credited with creating crème chantilly but it’s not true. Catherine de Medici, the First of Her Name and mother of 3 French Kings — including Francis II, Charles IX, and Henry III — brought to the technique of making whipped cream by herself from Italy where she came from.

You need to whip 200g (7 ounces) cream until you reach a soft peak and add 50g (1.75 ounces) sifted icing sugar at the end while whisking. If you add icing sugar too early it will melt inside of the cream and you won’t be able to reach the texture you want. Also, your cream must contain at least 30% of fat to be able to use for whipped cream.

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