Selfish Waltz

I don’t know, can’t describe You and I 다시 엉망이 돼가 전쟁 같아 오늘 밤도

I can’t describe it. We had already fallen apart, but why do I keep believing that we will fall on each other again? We knew how it ended, and yet once again, I believed we could’ve been repaired on what we had.

굳어버린 눈빛 Why you acting like that? We feel like we’ve gone crazy Why you so aggressive? 뱉어내지 서로에게 씻지 못할 날카로운 말

We had hurt each other; I remember what we did to one another. We were so perplexed about why we did it to each other, forgetting that our actions can’t be erased, no matter how much time has passed.

We used to decode each other, trying to understand one another’s actions without asking questions. It went on and on until we had given up on seeking the answer. We thought to ourselves, “Oh, okay, time goes on, we made mistakes,” centering our point of view without even trying to understand one another.

눈을 가리지 이기심이 마치 사랑한 적 없단 듯이 후회할 걸 알면서 Yeah, we know

We were blinded by our own selfishness, calling it unfair, as if we never loved each other. As if we would never want to hurt one another. As if we forget that we used to try our best to understand without judgment. We called it unfair; our ego blinded us, we hurt each other, and we might’ve been aware that we’d regret it. We may have known this, but we did it to protect ourselves.

매번 똑같아 마치 마치 Oh, waltz 같아 Waltz 같아 돌고 또 돌아 또 제자리에 제자리에 끝나지 않는 이 음악에 맞춰 춤추네 전쟁 같은 우리 Love song

It was the same thing for a while, like dancing the waltz. We were going round and round, without ever getting what we wanted. We kept it long enough until you asked me to stop. I didn’t want to, but you left me all alone in this dancing hall. I have no idea where I’m at. Without you, it feels strange. I thought I was getting used to it, but the thought of it keeps going round and round. I don’t even know what I’m thinking right now.

I don’t want to be blinded by selfishness again. I don’t want to discredit your perspective anymore. I don’t want to be mad at it any longer. The dance hall has been empty for a long time. I don’t want to keep you, as it leads nowhere. I thought I understood it by now. I thought I let it all go, but why do I keep dancing round and round, dancing to this endless music with no one else around me?

Do I still keep you in my mind, force you to fix things even though there’s nothing left to fix? Do I still tell you to make things right with me, blinded by my own selfishness, to bring me a false sense of security? Do I still grab your hand tightly, pull you closer, and expect you to lead me dancing the waltz?

Are we circling around each other, or is it just me? Maybe I know it’s the latter.