Version of You

I wonder how many versions of you exist.

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There’s the version of you that your parents know , the one who tries to stay strong even when everything feels heavy. The version that says, “Okay lang ako,” even when you’re carrying more than you can explain.

There’s the version your friends know , the one who laughs loudly, makes memories, and somehow finds the strength to show up despite everything happening behind the scenes.

There’s the version that strangers know. The version they create from a few seconds of seeing you. They don’t know your story. They don’t know your sacrifices, your silent breakdowns, your sleepless nights, or the dreams you’re fighting so hard to keep alive.

Then there’s the version of you that only appears when nobody is watching.

The version who questions everything.

The version who wonders if they’re doing enough.

The version who misses who they used to be.

The version who keeps asking,

“Kailan ba nagsimulang mawala yung dating ako?”

“Kailan ba nagsimulang mawala yung spark ko?”

And for a long time, maybe you’ve been searching for that old version of yourself.

The achiever.

The dreamer.

The fearless one.

The person who used to believe that anything was possible.

But what if the goal isn’t to find the old version of you?

What if the goal is to meet the new one?

Because the truth is, life changes people.

The version of you from years ago didn’t carry the responsibilities you carry now.

They didn’t experience the heartbreaks you’ve experienced.

They didn’t know the disappointments, failures, and realities that would eventually shape you.

You didn’t lose yourself.

You grew through things that changed you.

And growth rarely looks beautiful while it’s happening.

Sometimes growth looks like confusion.

Sometimes it looks like exhaustion.

Sometimes it looks like surviving another day when you have no motivation left.

Sometimes it looks like crying in silence and still waking up the next morning to continue.

People often celebrate the finished version of a person.

The successful version.

The healed version.

The version that finally figured everything out.

But nobody talks about the version in the middle.

The version that feels lost.

The version that doesn’t know where they’re going.

The version that’s trying their best to hold everything together.

Yet that version deserves recognition too.

Because that version is fighting battles nobody sees.

That version is carrying wounds while still showing up.

That version is building the future one small step at a time.

And maybe that’s who you are right now.

Not the strongest version.

Not the happiest version.

Not the most successful version.

Just the version that’s trying.

And sometimes, that’s more than enough.

Because somewhere in the future, there’s another version of you.

A version who finally understands why certain things had to happen.

A version who no longer blames themselves for every mistake.

A version who has learned that their worth was never measured by grades, achievements, productivity, or how useful they were to others.

A version who smiles when they remember this chapter and says,

“You were so hard on yourself.”

“You thought you were falling apart, but you were actually growing.”

“You thought you were losing yourself, but you were becoming someone new.”

So be patient with the version of you that exists today.

They’re carrying more than people know.

They’re trying harder than people see.

And they’re closer to becoming the person they’re meant to be than they realize.

Because this isn’t the end of your story.

This isn’t the final draft.

This isn’t the final version of you.

You’re still being written.

You’re still becoming.

And the best version of you may still be on its way.