In Our Waking Hours

Ians Buck (left) and Decker (right).

In June 2015 Ian Decker and Ian R Buck set out on an adventure down the Mississippi River in a canoe. The plan was to start at the headwaters in Itasca State Park on June 14 and travel to the Minnesota-Iowa border by July 12, 670 river miles in all. In reality the trip was cut short on June 30 at the Blanchard Dam portage, 370 miles from the start. It may be helpful to look at our float plan while you read to see the context and locations we reference. Below you will find the daily journal entries alongside photos taken during the trip. We also dream journaled, but those felt unrelated to the trip itself. The dreams exist as their own posts, which are linked to in this post.

Enjoy!

Day -1

Decker: Why I’m writing a journal: I want to write down and remember a few things. First, as much as I’d like to think otherwise, I’m not good at remembering day-to-day details and I want to be able to remember this stuff, for myself, for friends and family, and to possibly write a couple of articles (that could be fun!). I’m also going to be jotting some creative writing ideas, for both the podcast, was well as for SWORDS (parody of Marvel’s SHIELD). It’ll also serve its purpose as a scorecard for games, so the reader can enjoy watching me beat Buck’s Butt (or eat those words, we’ll see) over and over :) Either way, this will contain jottings of ideas for many things and probably more incomplete ideas than complete ideas. Either way, an adventure is out there!

Day 0

Decker: Things that I remember that I’ve forgotten today: my watch, my socks, my sunglasses, and my toothbrush. I also managed to get the first injury — a small splinter in my right foot, although I think we got it out (could be wrong though… we’ll see.) I’m not gonna lie, I’m still nervous about this whole thing — we’ve never done anything nearly this big before, and this is the smaller of the two planned trips. Another thing we forgot… a bear bag… Whoopsies! We’re currently planning on improvising with double-bagging it in these giant trash bags that we could use for body bags, and then using the rope we used to tie the canoe to the front of the van to hang it all up. I also have a blister already. I’m a problem child, I know. Today, however, was gorgeous! Sunny skies for most of the drive and although it did rain a bit, it was sunny in Itasca. First thing that I noticed after stepping out of the car was the entire place smells like scotch pine. It’s wonderfully sweet and mellow and helped me to calm down a bit (sniffing trees! Who knew?!)

The cabin is super cute and cozy — 3 rooms: bedroom, bathroom, and living room. It’s all super comfy and you just sink into whatever piece of furniture you sit in. It’s wonderfully welcoming. I have to admit, this is kinda where I would enjoy having a honeymoon — it’s beautiful out here and even if we get stuck inside due to rain, we can have plenty of fun inside :) The best part is that it overlooks the lake and it’s a gorgeous view with a fire pit in the back. Dinner was cooked over the fire and was wonderful. Overall, a relaxing way to start this adventure. (PS I’ve gotten to know my parents more tonight than most other nights. I felt comfortable being fairly candid with them and I usually have to have a filter on. It was super nice).

Buck: So, we’re doing this! It only really sank in when we loaded up the canoe yesterday. Huge shout out to the Holleys for letting us borrow it for a month! It’s going to be a great experience spending a month with Decker — since we’re living together after the trip, hopefully we don’t end up hating each other ;) The prospect of camping for 28 days straight is pretty daunting. I’ve never done anything longer than 10 days, and those were fairly structured. I’m not too worried about the canoeing part; we’re both fairly experienced at that. I am a little concerned that whenever I mention some piece of equipment Decker will likely need, he shrugs it off. I’ll just ignore the complaining when it gets cold. As a Computer Science and Communications, Media, and Rhetoric student, I have come to define my life by the media I consume. And I usually consume it digitally. So it will be very strange living with silence other than Decker’s and my voices. I have been recovering from a cold, so hopefully that goes away before long. I’ll be exhausted by the end of each day without the help of an illness. Hydration, fresh air, and farmer blowing into the river should help. To a long and personally fulfilling journey! Update on the splinter in Decker’s foot: it was glass. Gigi got it out.

Big thanks to Gigi (Decker’s mom) who helped us get everything organized! Most of the sponsorships came through her.

Day 1

Evening

Less than 30 feet into our journey we had to get out and pull the canoe!

Decker: To be honest, if every day is like today, I’m quitting when we hit Uncle Curt’s or before, depending… The river seems to have 2 modes — rapids in the forest or twisty-turney in a field of reeds. The forest rapids are a pain, since you can’t often see the rocks and even when you can, with a canoe this big, you can’t always navigate around them. Similarly, since it’s the forest, there are tons of downed and submerged logs in the way or branches that catch you, hanging over the river. Buck ended up going in the drink because I got caught on one and the canoe didn’t stop with me. We ended up walking a large chunk of the rapids because we got tired of getting caught on stuff. The reeds were better, but not by much — there was significantly more twisting and turning, with many turns sharp enough that we didn’t make them the first time…

To top things off, we lost the camel back, either when Buck went into the drink or when we were portaging. Huge bummer since we were going to use that and, mostly, because it was lent to us! We’ll have to get a replacement. Also, my sleeping bag is too short for me. Only 20 more days to go until I hit St. Paul and can grab a different one… (notice how I didn’t complain about cold). On a good note, the weather was perfect — neither too hot nor too cold. Also, despite our obstacles, we made it. I don’t entirely know how, but we did.

Buck: Well, it certainly wasn’t as bad as the Rum River last summer. I realize now why they warn you that river canoeing is way harder than lake canoeing. On a lake the back person steers and the front provides power. On a small creek like this, it is a team effort to keep the prow pointed downstream and make sharp turns.

When we asked one of the staff in the park where a good place to put into the river was, she said “Bemidji.” I didn’t appreciate that answer at the time, but maybe she was right.

It is encouraging that we made it to Coffee Pot, despite starting a lot later than planned. The map says tomorrow we might have rapids again and we might have a wetland where current is hard to follow. I bet if we don’t get lost we’ll make good time. Decker said something about not wanting me to feel like he’s holding me back. Truth is, I wouldn’t be here without him. There’s probably nobody else I would want to be here with. I think it would be a good idea to get some cheap shoes for use in camp. Our sandals don’t dry fast, and if it is any colder than today or the camp isn’t as nicely upkept as this one, we will want stuff on our feet.

Day 2

Morning

Buck: Dream: Avatar Meets A Song of Ice and Fire.

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Evening

Buck: Today we made it to Bear Den Landing, sort of as planned. We had mismatching campsite and mile marker written on our float plan, so we went with the mile marker. I hope that “Bear Den” is just a cute name. We hiked up the road a ways, and saw some coyote/wolf prints and skat from a predator.

The trip was quite pleasant. We had some more wetlands and some rapids, but both were better than yesterday’s. The wetlands was almost like lake canoeing: almost no current, and the turns weren’t sharp enough to warrant pivoting. We passed a couple of DNR people doing some surveying at the start of the rapids. We were in pretty high spirits throughout the day, and we might have pressed on to another camp a mile farther, but the clouds were looking more like rain. Sure enough, it started sprinkling soon after we got here. We pitched the tent and got everything stowed. Surprisingly, I don’t feel demoralized by cold and wet. Probably because I am wearing good socks. PS I’ve had Pompeii stuck in my head all day.

Decker: Today was significantly better than yesterday. The weather was a little sunny w/ a lot of clouds, so the temp. was perfect. In terms of terrain, either we got better or the river got easier, but it wasn’t stressful at all! We even managed to stay dry until it rained on us (and that was while we were making camp!) So, a couple of cool things is that every day, we seem to have an animal mascot that we see a lot of during the day: Yesterday, it was fields full of dragonflies. Today, there were red-winged blackbirds everywhere (as well as a number of muskrats). I’m starting to feel like we can actually do this (assuming the rain stops…)

Day 3

Morning

Buck: Forgot to write this last night. Yesterday Decker blew my mind by telling me about a Roman god named Ianus. It is the two-faced god, Ian and I really are two parts of one person, and that person is a god! Since January was named for Ianus, we decided that New Year’s Eve is a celebration for us. And since the two things that happen are drinking and sex, I told Ian that the drinking can be in his name if the sex is in my name.

Evening

A black bear!

Buck: Wow, today had basically everything. Where do I even begin? First, while we were packing up we spotted a bear not 50 feet away. It bounded off down the road. Later, a guy with a couple of dogs showed up. He was really friendly, gave us some advice on what we will run into later. He even donated $5 to the Michael J Fox Foundation! Today’s portion had two caution tags on the map: “Excessive vegetation. May be impassable.” and “Numerous log jams.” This has made me realize how many discrepancies there are between our float plan and the map/reality; today’s entry in the float plan says “no additional concerns.” I’ll be going through both in a moment to update the float plan. The “excessive vegetation” turned out to be the biggest problem. The current was almost nonexistent through most of the wetland, and it got so shallow in places that we were inching along by digging our paddles in the mud. We also took the long way around several times when the river diverged and came back together. We finally ate lunch at about 2:30 at Iron Bridge, 10 miles into the day. I don’t ever want to see wetlands again. I was so demoralized that I suggested stopping at Iron Bridge so we wouldn’t have to deal with two hazards in one day. Luckily Decker encouraged me on, and we made great time in the second half. The log jams had mostly been cut by DNR staff, but I can tell that some years it would have been terrible to try. Originally we were going to camp at Silver Maple, but the mosquitoes were bad so we pressed on to Lake Irving, hoping to camp at a canoe access. We couldn’t find it, and (running on fumes) went back upstream to where we had seen a sign on a private dock that said “river campers welcome.”

We figured it would cost money, but Roger Jarvi is really avid about the river, and this is his way of giving back. He said he’s had the sign up for two weeks and we are the first ones to stop by. He’s a really cool guy, even drove us to the grocery store when we asked if there were any near the lake. I encourage anyone who wants to go down the river to stop by, it’s just before you go under US Highway 2. And no, he doesn’t play the banjo. Today’s mascot is friendly, helpful Minnesotans. Good night, journal. Between Decker’s snoring and the semis driving on the highway, I am glad I have ear plugs.

Decker: Oofda. I was so worn out by day 3 that I ended up having to wait until the morning after to write this (at my most coherent last night, I was able to mumble “I’m goin’ bed.”). Yesterday was a struggle and a half, but we made it through. The first 3 hours were slow going all we saw was wetlands, wetlands, and more wetlands. Lots and lots of twists and turns, shallow areas where we had to drag ourselves through the mud, and there was no current and lots of little side passages where we ended up taking the longer way by accident.

During lunch, we almost just set up camp there since we were already exhausted from just that bit, but we decided to trek on. From that point on, the river started to look like a proper river, widening up and getting deeper, as well as straightening out a fair amount. There were still a couple of spots where the river branched off, but we found the short ones this time! All was pleasant until we hit the log jams. There’s a ~2 mile portion of the river that’s heavy forest and swamp. Lots of the annual storms make for lots of downed trees which makes for lots of river hazards. Apparently, the DNR sends out a bunch of people each year to clear a path as best they can, only they can’t use power tools for fear of the oil polluting the river. That would suck. I do not envy these people. The river was kinda mean in that it kept on teasing us with clearer space for about 30 yards, then curving around right back into the swamp woods. Well, we did make it to our intended campsite, but were so fed up with the mosquitoes at that point (seriously, there were enough to put Dracula to shame) that we decided to try and press on for a supposed canoe landing at the lake, 1.5 miles farther. Lo-and-behold, despite our best efforts, the landing eluded us, so we were forced to turn around. Thankfully, we didn’t have to go too far as we had seen a “River campers welcome” sign only about a ½ mile from the lake. We hadn’t stopped there initially because we thought it would cost some money. Not only was it free, but the family there was willing to drive us into town to the grocery store. Make sure you stop here if you are camping along the river, they’re great. It was a long day (~24.5 mi total, over about 8 hours), and I was too tired to formulate words, but it was a good one in the end.

Day 4

Evening

Decker: Well, today was lake day. We made it across Lake Irvine, Lake Bemidji, Stump Lake, Andrusia Lake, and part of the way across Cass Lake. During lunch @ Stump Lake, we met an interesting guy named Dave. He claimed to have biked to Bemidji from Pensacola, FL and then started a kayak trip from Bemidji to New Orleans. Man, I thought that we were going a long way O.o Today was another long one where we pushed onto 25 miles. I fear I may be pushing Buck a little hard. He’s always working hard and putting up with my shit, so for him to have to deal with me being wishy-washy about sleeping spots is a lot. Tonight, I’m freaking out a bit because some animal (probs Coon) moseyed into our camp when it’s dark out… either way, there are supposed to be T-storms tomorrow and over the weekend, but hopefully they’re not that bad.

Buck: Goodness, what did today not have? It’s a very good thing we shopped yesterday, as that would have added too much time to today’s journey. I’m glad we crossed Lake Bemidji first thing in the morning, as it was long and arduous. Most of the rest of the journey was pleasant, and the current downstream of the Co Rd 12 Dam more than made up for the portage.

As Decker mentioned, we met This Guy Named Dave. I can only hope to have the economic freedom to do what he does. He told me that he doesn’t have a plan, he’s just paddling at a leisurely pace until he gets tired. He doesn’t have anywhere he has to be until a conference in October apparently. I was expecting today to be sort of a rest day, or at least to have enough free time to wash a bit and do a thorough tick check. Ian had other plans and convinced me to keep paddling twice. To be fair, the planned campsite was a sandy bluff, the next canoe access was on a country road and really exposed (didn’t want to be bothered by some country kids with no better source of entertainment) and the next was nonexistent. So we ended up on Star Island in Cass Lake. I’m getting fed up with these late-in-the-day improvisations. We don’t need to be ahead of schedule, we need to keep our strength up!

That being said, I think the weather tomorrow and Saturday might slow us down significantly. Crossing Lake Winnie is going to suck. Today’s mascot is the Bald Eagle, we saw lots of them.

Day 5

Evening

Buck: Some advice for anybody planning on doing anything like this:

• Don’t underestimate how hard lakes can be. We knew Lake Winnie was going to take most of a day. What we didn’t realize was that Cass Lake was going to throw huge waves and wind at us, and Lake Winnie was basically impassable.
• If you need help, ask somebody for help. We have run into so many people this trip who have gone out of their way to help us. The invasive species inspector who lent us his car to carry our stuff on the portage; the host at West Winnie who let us stay free of charge; the people staying there who invited us to dinner; the people in the Mississippi Paddlers Facebook group who offered us a place to stay downriver and are giving us a ride around Lake Winnie.
• Make a reasonable plan based on recent maps, but be flexible enough to find a different spot to camp if your first choice doesn’t exist or if your pace is different from what you thought.
• Pay attention to the signals your body is giving you, and act on them. Don’t put off drinking water just because you want to keep paddling. Take care of your body, and it will keep you moving forward.
• Navigation works best with a map and a compass.

An old railroad bridge that had burned down.

Today we fought the wind way more than we wanted to, so we will be getting a lift by car to the end of Lake Winnie, and will be ahead of the float plan until we get to Bergland on Day 11. We had a strange encounter with current events today. When we got to the end of Cass Lake, we had a portage around the dam. There was a watercraft inspector there checking boats for invasive species. While we were unpacking, another guy who works at the camp nearby came up and said, “do they fit the description?” Hoping he was joking around and we just didn’t get it, we kind of laughed and went, “what description?” Decker even pointed at me and said, “whatever it is, he did it!” Eventually the guy explained that there were a couple of convicted murderers who had escaped from the St Cloud penitentiary. Haha, hilarious, right?

Decker: Never before have the phrases “I hate wind” and “I love people” been more true for me. Today, we started out with warring with the wind on Cass Lake. I learned 2 things:

1. 3ft waves at your back aren’t that bad
2. 3ft waves anywhere else are a bitch-and-a-half

What should’ve taken about an hour or so took 2 ½, with us fighting and finding the limits of our bodies as we tackled waves that were constantly turning us and pushing us towards shore, often times turning themselves into unwelcomed guests in our boat. The relaxation at the portage was heavenly. We then experienced normal river until a couple of miles out from Lake Winnie, when the wind began to pick up. It was worse than Cass was and one of my arms even gave out… More frustration was had when we ended up going past our campsite and wound up at a public campground. Here’s where things take a turn; while at West Winnie, we get some help from a guy camping up here as part of a family reunion. His name is Anthony. Anthony and 4 of the kids here, Hunter, Connor, Dominick, and “The Small One” (Gabe?) helped up schlep up our stuff, grab an open spot, and talk with the campsite host about letting us stay here (he did, free of charge too). We also decided on finding a ride to the dam instead of crossing Lake Winnie. We were blessed in that a couple downstream offered to put us up for a night and when I asked if they knew anyone in the area who could help us with a ride, they offered that too. We were invited to dinner with Anthony and the kids and spent the evening talking and hanging out. It was our best night so far, despite everything that happened during the day.

*Some things I appreciate about Buck

• Ever-present enthusiasm/optimism
• Similar great sense of humor
• Willing to listen to me, even when other things are screaming “no”
• Works so friggin’ hard, in and out of canoe
• Forces me to fight past my perceived limits
• Respectful (talks about deep and important things)
• I can now feel vulnerable around him (as opposed to a few years back)

Day 6

Morning

Buck: It started raining sometime during the night (as expected) and it is still going, as of 7:30 am. Hopefully it stops by the time we get in the water, but we’ll be going unless there is thunder. Dream: Tabletop Games with My Heroes.

Afternoon

Buck: I really like this new plan with two semi-rest days in a row! That ride saved our butts. Not only did we get to take it easy on the river (the current picked up a lot) but we now have some free time to dry clothes, fix binders, play cribbage, maybe even wash hair! :)

Decker: We actually have some time to rest today! We got up this morning and everything went according to plan. We got our ride and got out of there before our campsite host got into trouble. The guy who gave us the ride, Jeff, is also who we will be spending tomorrow night with! We may be able to ask for a ride from him, much like earlier, into town for supplies. We’ll see. Despite a wet start, it was a beautiful day and a beautiful paddle.

Decker: (…I’ve been sick since about day 2. Today, my cough is worse and stool was liquid… may have to call it in a couple days if I don’t start improving.)

Buck: My farts smell like the gumbo we had for dinner, and it’s great!

Day 7

Morning

Buck: I had a couple of dreams this morning worth writing down. Dream: English Majors and Ninjas. Dream: Puzzles and Treasure.

Evening

Buck: Oh yes, these two rest days are exactly what we needed after a few hard push days. Today in particular was marvelous: we got to the Bromenschenkel’s before we even stopped for lunch! Their setup for canoers is even more developed than Roger Jarvi’s. They have a camper in their yard, and Jeff invited us into the house to use the shower, washing machine, and relax. He even made us stir fry for dinner! We have reevaluated the float plan, and assuming that the driver in Grand Rapids (oh, did I mention that the power company provides a service for paddlers to get around the two dams?) is willing to stop by the grocery store on the way, we can feasibly get a full day ahead of the original plan. Now we’re watching an old TV show about a detective named Columbo. It’s hilarious, and stars the grandpa from The Princess Bride! Definitely stop here if you make the trip.

Decker: So, one small thing that I forgot to mention about yesterday… so one of the steering strokes in canoeing is called the draw. Often times on this trip so far, I’ve had to have Buck do a draw in the front to help me out and he would often times get confused by what I was asking (that, and “draw” just got boring.) Well, no more does that predicament plague us — from now on, I yell “French Girl!” (“Draw me like one of your French Girls”) when I need him to draw. It’s kinda humorous when I tell him to “French Girl Harder”. Today was an awesome day and exactly what was needed. It was supposed to be a rest day and ended up being exactly that. We stayed with the Bromenshenkels today and I could not have asked for anything better. We only paddled about 10 miles, had good conversations, had a hot shower and hot meal, a 3-hr nap on one of the comfiest couches I have encountered, being able to plug stuff in, get introduced to some funny shows, watch a good, light-hearted movie, and then sleep on camper mattresses w/ foam pads to make them even softer. Another awesome thing is that if we just have one good push day, we’ll be a full day ahead of schedule! That means good mattresses to sleep on, games to play, video calls, and good pizza and beer (Jeff gave me a Pilsner Urquell today w/ dinner. It was fantastic) all that much sooner.

Day 8

Evening

This was the hardest rain we experienced on the trip.

Decker: I’m having trouble believing how far we made it in one day! (and moreso how far we’ll have to go tomorrow!) We made it about 36 miles in one day, although we did have some help. We took advantage of the truck/portage help services at the dam and got a ride from the first dam to a little ways past the second. The driver was a really cool guy and was also nice enough to stop at the grocery store that was en route so that we could stock up! Weather-wise, it was sort of a strange day; it started with thunderstorms. We waited to leave the Bromenschenkels’ until those were all done, but did end up getting caught out by some pretty heavy rainfall. After that, it didn’t really rain on us the whole day, except for when we were getting the dam portage. The weirdest thing was the wind; with the exception of 2–3 times, it was at our backs the whole day, which is good because I would not have been able to fight 20 mph winds all day. Our campsite was nice and had a few luxuries! It had a toilet, a bear-box, and some dry firewood with a saw, so we decided to have a fire! It was a peaceful evening.

Day 9

Evening

The cabin we camped next to.

Another nice cabin we passed.

Buck: Oofda, now that was a push day! I believe we went somewhere around 40 miles. On the bright side, we won’t have to do that again because we are now a full day ahead of schedule! Well, almost; we actually stopped at a cabin about three miles from Ms Keto. It is a gorgeous property, and the guy who lives here is selling it! How I wish that we weren’t penniless college graduates right now. Maybe when we have enough money we should make the trip again to scout for properties. We passed three major milestones today: we have traveled over 200 miles, we are ⅓ of the way through the trip time-wise, and we passed mile marker 1138. Today’s mascot is the snapping turtle. We saw several lounging on the clay shores, but each time they clambered to the water pretty quick. Throughout the trip, Decker keeps saying that the Mississippi “looks like a proper river now.” We’ve gotten to the point where I agree. It’s wide, it’s deep, it has clearly carved its path out of the surrounding landscape, and some of the fish I’ve seen have been huge!

Decker: I thought that yesterday was long. Well, I’m right, but today was longer. We shot for about 40 miles and made it there (ended up stopping at a gorgeous little cabin and camping in the backyard. Super pretty area, another campfire, where I get to try making a Swedish Chimney! He’s selling it, though, so I don’t think that we’ll get a chance to send him a postcard…) One or two more long days and we’re a full day ahead of schedule! Not really that much more to say — long day, nice weather, nice stopping place, nothing too eventful.

Day 10

Morning

Buck: Dream: CES in Stockholm.

Evening

Buck: Amazingly, this wasn’t such a bad push day. It was sunny and there wasn’t much wind, so we made sure to stay hydrated and kept plodding along. We made good time, averaging just over 5 mph. That, coupled with our lunch break cut short by mosquito swarms, allowed us to reach Palisade and Berglund Park by about 6pm. Ironically the mosquitoes here are just as bad. On the other hand, we have now caught up with David, the kayaker who was at the Bromenschenkel’s a day before us. He’s pretty cool; originally from Kenya, he got his PhD in Britain, and came to the States in the 80s or 90s because work was scarce. He’s done a few trips like this, in particular the Missouri River. He’s taking it a lot easier than us, but it sounds like we’ll all be be together in Aikin tomorrow as well. We walked into town to get some ice cream after dinner. Just because we’re on an adventure doesn’t mean we can’t have treats! The campsite here is a little expensive ($20 per night) but it has shower, so we took advantage of that. Decker said that Dr Bronner’s soap feels weird on the body. I didn’t think it felt weird until after I rinsed off, at which point my penis felt unnaturally cold. Hasn’t fallen off yet, so I call it good. The weather is getting foul. It’s supposed to rain hard tonight, so we put the tents and all the gear in the dining shelter. I think we might still get wet because the wind has picked up significantly. Hope it gets better by morning.

Decker: Woohoo! Double digit day! So today had some nice surprises — first, according to NOAA weather radio, it was supposed to thunderstorm all day. Instead, it was actually quite pleasant and required a fair amount of sunblock. This was particularly nice, because we pushed ourselves a bit for distance and went about 40 miles today as well. The rest of the days should all be easier now. The second pleasant surprise is that we ran into David from the Facebook group. He’s lived all over — he grew up in Kenya, went to high school in Ireland, not sure where he did his undergrad, but ended up getting a PhD in animal behavior in Scotland, then moved over to the States (and around in the States) when jobs opened up. I think he’s somewhere around 80, is what Jeff had said, but a pretty dang fantastic guy, all-in-all. The campsite was OK, especially for the price ($20), but it had showers and a shelter to help us weather last night’s storm. All things said, it was a good day.

Probably the biggest horse fly I have ever seen.

Day 11

Evening

Buck: Being done with those 40 mile days feels like being over the hump of Wednesday in a long week! Today we were able to go slower and get to our destination sooner than yesterday. Because we were taking it easy, Decker and I talked a lot more than usual. We had a lengthy conversation about the implications of the technological singularity: what will be possible, how the technology will view us, what level of augmentation we would be okay with… you know, simple stuff. Decker also told me a bunch about the subject of his Classics Capstone, which dealt with memory and music. Really cool stuff, I hope I can read the whole paper when we get back. Aitkin is a decently sized town, so we walked into town to use the laundromat and check out the pizza place we had heard about. The pizza was nice and filling, but not overly tasty. That’s fine, filling is what we needed. We passed an overflow dam today, which had a bunch of signs with broken canoes reading “danger dam” which sounds like a relative of Dirty Dan.

Decker: It was a fairly nice paddle today. It was a beautiful day, albeit warm. We got to Aitkin a little later than anticipated (we took a nice, lazy day). The town of Aitkin was fairly pretty and had everything we needed — laundromat, a pizza place (pretty good), and a liquor store where I picked up a 6-pack of Summit Saga (wanted to give Dave a taste of good, MN beer) that Dave and I are sharing as I write this and fight off mosquitoes. To Uncle Curt’s tomorrow!

Day 12

Morning

Decker: Dream: That Decker is a Spy!

Evening

Buck: I’m really glad we had the stop at Uncle Curt’s today! When we were a couple of miles from the water access where we were meeting him, we started seeing and hearing foul weather in the distance. If not for our stop being so close, we would have hunkered down on the shore.

The care package Gigi sent is amazing! There are so many yummy-looking dinners in there that I think our next couple of resupplies will be just bread and muffins. Curt’s setup up here is pretty nifty: a camper, an open-air tent over a picnic table, and a hot shower outside cobbled together from a giant water tank, a generator, and a propane water heater. After a hearty steak and mushroom dinner, we had a good time shooting some of Curt’s guns: a couple of shotguns, a revolver, and a .30–06. By my third round with the shotgun, I had figured out how to aim it, and I went 5 for 5! I think Curt caught on that I’m not so hot on gun ownership, so he asked me a couple of questions about how I feel on the subject. I suppose the only things I can really complain about is that Smoke, Curt’s dog, is overzealously playful and never does what he’s told; and Curt’s truck is going to be the death of us. I almost forgot to mention: we crossed the 300 milestone today!

We came up with the “tumbs-up fist-bump” which now seems so obvious I can’t believe nobody else has thought of it.

Decker: Today was fun! Mostly… So today is the day that we spent the evening with Uncle Curt. We got to see his new piece of land, which is honestly really pretty. There’s a baby red pine forest growing around the place where he’s got his camper set up, so it’s fairly open now. The deer hunting here is apparently good, so I may have to try that again. The only downsides to this place are that there is no electricity and the road in makes it feel as if Uncle Curt’s truck is going to finally fall apart. So, food was really yummy (a big, honkin’ sirloin steak w/ mushrooms, and salad, and some baked beans) but the entertainment afterward was the best. We each got to shoot some of Uncle Curt’s guns. There were two shotguns — a break-action over-under and a semi-automatic 1101. Both are from the 1910’s and have wonderfully beautiful engravings. The .357M revolver is always fun to shoot and the .30–06 has more bark than I remember (I actually jumped when Buck fired his first round.) During dinner, there were a couple of conversations that bugged me — how necessary or unnecessary guns in the home are, environmental issues, and how I’m supposedly going to become more conservative as I get older (no!!!!) Thankfully, I have Buck, who would kill me if I went too far over to the dark side. Smoke is still the same dummy as ever. I know he’s loving and I know he means well and just wants to play, but he still gets quite obnoxious. All-in-all, I’m glad that we stopped here. I had a good time (won 2 for 2 games of cribbage!) despite the annoyances, got a good care package from mom, and had some fun.

Day 13

Evening

Buck: Ah, rest days. How I love thee! Despite not having any pressure to get up from time constraints, the pressure in my bladder got me up at about 7:30. We had a nice breakfast of scrambled eggs, bacon, and blueberry muffins. Afterwards we played a game of three person hearts, which plays way different from regular hearts. I lost pretty handily. After we packed up, Curt drove us around a bit of the property. There’s not much there, and I found it hard to believe that both Curt and the owner of a nearby plot want to build houses out there. Probably a failing of imagination on my part. We got going on the river before 12:30, and we got to Half-Moon Campsite in very good time. We had most of the afternoon to rest and hang out with David. Only things sullying the day were the mosquitoes and drama at home that we are trying to help alleviate remotely. Ah, well. PS New milestone: because we were on the river such a short time, today was the first day I didn’t pee off the canoe.

Decker: I love my Uncle, and I love his dog, but I was ready to be done with them by the time we left today. I couldn’t even go poop without the dog following me and trying to get me to play (I got a slobbery pinecone thrown down my boxers when they were down). Uncle Curt insists he’s intelligent and understands human thought, but I can pretty much guarantee that that’s not the case. Oh well. Today was a rest day, though, and we met up with David again (yay!) He taught me roughly about a couple of carpentry techniques (such as biscuit joints) and the more we talk, the more I’m glad for his company. Good talks, good food, and now we all hide from mosquitoes and storms in tents. Yay! (Oh yeah, there’s some drama going on at the home.)

Day 14

Evening

Buck: So that’s two weeks down! The mosquitoes were so bad this morning that we had a floating breakfast — a first for this trip!

David didn’t get out very long before us, and we caught up with him at the portage in Brainerd. It was pretty short, paved, and even had some pit toilets available. Oh, weird thing: the lakes before Brainerd smelled like root beer. I’m glad that we hardly had to get anything at the grocery store today, because Google Maps directed me to a Cub that was a 40 minute walk from the river. Granted, it was guiding me on roads, and I could take shortcuts, and I jogged on the way there. Still, good thing I ran into a SuperOne foods before getting to the Cub. I got back to the bridge just as a sheriff in a boat was asking Ian some questions. I bet he looked pretty sketchy there, especially since the bridge is a popular spot for tagging. Our original plan was to go to Baxter, a DNR campsite. David pointed out that Crow Wing State Park wasn’t much farther, and they had water and probably electricity. They do, so we had a shower and laundry evening and are (slowly) charging the phone. The mosquitoes are awful here again, and I bet they would have been better at Baxter; it looked like it had a nice, constant breeze. All three of us are pretty beat by the day, so I expect we’ll be going to bed early.

Decker: Nothing much to say about the day yesterday — we rowed, we portaged, and we arrived at our destination. The only really eventful thing was that when we grabbed lunch, a bird shat on the lid of the peanut butter… We thought that we’d be ok with just putting it in the bread bag, but the evening proved otherwise. Raccoons! A couple of them invaded our camp and got into the bag, so we’re peanut butter-less now. I’m also starting to feel more sick in a different way — I have a headache, my eyes are hurting, and my vision is a little blurry. This, on top of every site swarming with fucking mosquitoes is making me want to call it early. I don’t think that Buck is going to be able to get me to leave St Paul when we get there.

Day 15

Afternoon

Buck: Decker still isn’t feeling well. Apparently he began feeling fatigued as soon as we started paddling. Good thing it was a nice short day with a strong current, otherwise I doubt we would have made it here. Camp Ripley Military Reserve occupied the right bank for pretty much the whole way down. Other than the frequent signs telling us not to come ashore, it looked just like any other stretch of the river. And other than the sounds of unseen heavy machinery and distant large automatic weapons fire, it sounded like any other stretch of river. The river acted quite different from the precious stretches. It was very shallow in sections (got stuck and had to walk about 10 feet once) which is what made the current so swift. Apparently some of the islands here were formed by log jams during the days of the logging industry, which I find fascinating.

Fletcher Creek campsite is much like any other DNR paddler site: primitive, mosquito-filled, and hard to get to. Decker took some meds when we got here and called my mom to try to figure out what’s wrong with him (besides the obvious, I mean.) She thinks it is heat exhaustion. Luckily, his fever has gone down since taking the meds (102.2 to 101.2). I’m thinking that (assuming Decker gets better) when we get to St Paul, it would be best to end the trip there. Not only is this trip really not Decker’s cup of tea, but it would have made more sense to plan a trip from Itasca to home than from Itasca to the totally arbitrary MN/IA border. Mom made another suggestion that I wasn’t expecting: if Decker has to stop for health reasons, she could bring Caleb or Jonas to take his place. Intriguing idea, assuming the victim in question actually wanted to come. It still wouldn’t be the same without Decker.

Decker: Well, today has been interesting, aside from the symptoms mentioned earlier. My muscles were extra sore, I was immediately fatigued after getting into the boat, and I became nauseous after eating or drinking. The campsite was only 20 miles away today, but I felt more tired than after our 40-mile days. I also, after we arrived, took my temp and saw that I had a fever of 102.2. After all that stress, I ended up calling both my mom and Amy Buck. Amy has me medicating and monitoring myself and it seems like we should be able to go on. To be honest, I’m a little bummed. After all that’s been happening, I am more than ready to go home. If I get the thumbs-up though, I’ll stick with it, although I won’t be happy about it. I enjoy smaller trips. I think that this one may be a little much for me.

[embed]I stole this joke from Tales from the Borderlands.

Day 16

Afternoon

Buck: I think this may be the day that ends the trip. It started off well: we woke up to Decker’s temperature being a very reasonable 97.1 or so. We got on the river by 9:30 and made good time to Little Falls. It is a gorgeous little town (my view is skewed by the fact that the portage was in a very nice park). We were greeted by a man with a ranger and trailer who offered to haul our stuff for us. He even drove me up to the SA so I could resupply quickly.

The next section of the river was slower, but not too bad. The second portage has proven our downfall. It was long — much longer than the 300 yards the map claims. We carried a few light things through the first time to get the lay of the land. Unexpectedly, it crosses a really nice bike trail and ends near a public fishing spot. David was here, packing up his Kayak. He mentioned that he had done the portage in sections. That turned out to be the right idea. We alternated heavy load, light load, canoe. This gave us the chance to recuperate between times carrying the canoe, and none of our gear was out of our sight for very long… except for the stuff we carried the very first time, of course. When we got back down to the end, our stuff was gone. Walking back up to the parking lot, we saw a teenager setting down some of our dry sacks. When we asked him, he said he had found them down by the shore. That still left the blue backpack unaccounted for, which of course was where Decker’s wallet was. We have searched all over the area, with no luck. Decker spent the last 45 minutes reporting wallet and various debit cards stolen. Decker’s sleeping stuff was also in there, so we really don’t want to go on without it. Time to go home, I think. The worst part is that now we’re stuck waiting for several hours for a ride, with a few days’ worth of food. Whatever shall I do?

Decker: Woah man. Another exciting day in the adventures of Ian and Ian. The day actually started off really nicely with making good time to the first dam. When we got there, we got picked up by a guy in a ranger (4-wheeler) with a little trailer and he not only took us across the portage, but drove Buck to pick up some more supplies. We seemed to be making good time @ the second dam, but that’s where shit hit the fan. First, the portage was supposed to be only 300 yards. Ended up being a half mile with lots of steep hills. As Buck mentioned, our method of moving stuff seemed to work ok, but left our stuff @ the beach too long unattended. As a result, our blue backpack (which contained my sleeping gear, keys, and wallet) was stolen, so we spent the rest of the time looking for it. Didn’t find it so cancelled the cards inside, called the sheriff, and called home. We decided to call it. To top it all off though, I’m pretty sure that schlepping that gear, plus the stress, gave me some heat exhaustion again. I’m nauseous whenever I cough, I’m light-headed, and just overall miserable. I am ready to be home.