M. Night Shyamalan got nothing on me

melatonin

I am all four seasons (at once) and then some (not yet discovered)

Source: Adobe Stock; photo by Blackday; edited by author

[embed]Source: Soundcloud; performed by author

April is the cruelest month, breeding Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing Memory and desire, stirring¹

increased activity, energy, agitation;

grandiose beliefs, decreased need for sleep, racing thoughts, markedly increased energy and rapid speech

// or is it ADHD with a twist of social anxiety?

well shiiiiiiit, M. Night Shyamalan got nothing on me — see, these Signs, they Split my internal Avatar // what is Happening to me?

what is happening to me?

these thoughts, they clash — there’s no symphony; no rhyme or reason (nor sympathy)

I am all four seasons (at once) and then some (not yet discovered)

Source: Adobe Stock; photo by Blackday; edited by author

I feel scared that I’m going manic, that I’m going crazy, that I’m losing myself slowly

that I’m not sleeping enough, I guess; that I’m a little bit too happy

I’m scared I’m going manic

I’m scared I’m gonna go psychotic again and lose my mind and start believing all these delusional things about my life that just aren’t true

I’m scared

I’m scared

I guess I’m scared…

¹This quote is a sample from T.S. Eliot’s *The Wasteland *(Public Domain)