Friendship by Design

The Whimsy Quotient

Finding your people, one decorative duck at a time

Friendship, but make it wildly over-landscaped — image created with ChatGPT.

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How do you know you can be friends with someone?

Do you use personality tests? Astrology? Woo-woo science? C’mon, it’s a thing.

But forget Myers-Briggs. I have my own methods.

How about when you go to Marshalls — you know, the discount-store treasure hunt where designer leftovers, random home décor, and oddly specific candles all end up under one roof?

You see someone picking up a candle that says “Sunday Night Mimosa” or “Don’t Rush Me.” Or — wait for it — “Due at Midnight. Started at 11:47.” Lookie here — a fellow procrastinator. Who also loves cocktails!

If you see them sniffing “Smells Like a Good Book & No Plans” or “Light Up for a Plot Twist,” would you be tempted to go over and ask, “Hey, potential bestie — do you love reading? Are you a writer too — the unpaid kind?”

Maybe that’s why my current project manager and I are such good friends — he understands exactly why we need a “Group Project Emotional Support Candle.”

Because if I see you clutching a jar of scented wax that perfectly chronicles a looming deadline you’ve ignored so far, we are vibing. Who needs a keyhole into someone’s soul when Marshalls has already put their entire personality on a candle?

Myers-Briggs, but make it scented wax. Photo by Author

And if you pick up a box of my favorite cardamom chai, should I ask for your number? Suggest a tea date? Begin planning our future as beverage-based best friends?

At this point, your last name can wait. What kind of cake do you want for your birthday?

But my screening process doesn’t stop at the retail racks, y’all. It extends to the streets.

Imagine you’re on your Costco run and you come across a house with a small pond.

“This is the Midwest. Everyone has a pond, Sunita.”

True. But do they have a small boat and a tiny deck — a setup that is 100% decorative and 0% functional?

How about a tiny wooden bridge in the middle of the lawn?

Ooh, look at that house. I’m a sucker for those planters that look like wells. Or actual rustic carts, wheel and all, overflowing with flowers.

Or a bicycle leaning artistically against a post, seasonal flowers spilling from the basket.

Yeah, I am a sucker for lotsa things. We’ve established that.

Anyone with that touch of whimsy — an arched trellis, a climbing rose, fairy lights illuminating a path to nowhere — is probably my kind of person.

If I see a concrete mother duck leading her frozen stone babies through your mulch, we are vibing.

Evidence that whimsy has breached containment. Photo by Author

If you have a collection of cement rabbits doing downward dog on your lawn, giant spinning sunflowers, and a line of hanging baskets on your front porch — or a giant panther with gleaming yellow eyes lounging in your oak tree — then you have the exact level of unhinged whimsy I require in a best friend.

One stray black cat, and I’m sold.

If your yard looks like a zoo got hit by a concrete truck, please DM me.

These are just the little pebbles on the wildly overlandscaped path to friendship.

If I love your chaotic, hyper-specific landscaping, you legally cannot be a bad person.

That is just science.

The sky was showing off, so naturally I pulled over. Photo by Author

And if someone pulls over on a stretch of road with no parking — right behind you — and starts taking pictures, do you think, Oh, they stopped for the sky too? Collecting a few keepsakes before the colors disappear.

Or do you immediately start imagining the golden-hour beginning of a new friendship?

Let me know in the comments. I’m getting back in the car now. Too many bugs.

This field guide to finding your garden-variety friend was written in response to Mystical Adventure ~ Edition #34 and its single-word prompts: Birthday, Pebbles, Keyhole, Keepsake, and Stray.

Thanks to Brenda Arledge for the inspiration — and for this publication.

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