© Vytas Stoskus, 2025

Santa’s Job Losing Its Luster

Chubby Old Man May Become Another Unemployment Statistic

Many probably envy Santa’s job of bringing joy & good cheer to the world’s children, young & old, but few probably realize how oppressive & wearing it has become in recent times.

Some Christmas seasons in recent years, Santa has been tempted to call it quits, to chuck it all. Having been so conscientiously checking & rechecking his list, often more than twice, he’s finding himself at year’s end usually spending more time at the coal mine than at his workshop where he delights in working & creating in the company of his devoted & industrious elves.

Each year there seem to be more & more bad boys on his list, so many, in fact, that he’s considered just ignoring them, pulling a no-show, but he feels it is his responsibility to let them know he’s watching & following official accounting procedures. As a result, his job gets dirtier & dirtier from year to year. Definitely not what he signed up for.

The reindeer have become less sprightly & more listless as well, having noticed Santa’s lagging spirits & energy when they see him going to the coal corner of the sleigh. Those coal stops do, however, save him the time of sliding down the chimney, for he can just shovel the coals down the chimney without hardly stopping at all. He did make an extra long stop at the White House this year & loaded not one but 2 extra shovels of coal.

The oppressive mood at these stops have been resulting in other problems, however. Rudolph’s nose has become dimmer, & sometimes even fails to relight. Sometimes the taillights don’t work on the sleigh & no one bothers to take care of them, & the sleigh’s runners have not been getting waxed properly on a regular basis.

Everyone is feeling an especially oppressive weight this season with the bad boys taking up so much more of the agenda & spoiling it for those worthy of special gifts & attention. Holiday cheer almost feels like an afterthought.

Santa © Vytas Stoskus, 2025

© Vytas Stoskus, 2025

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