The Happiness Trap We All Fall Into

This post is a special one for me. ❤️

It’s not just another random thought. It’s something my wife and I end up discussing again and again in our daily life. Maybe you’ll relate to it too.

Like every weekend, our society friends continued its little tradition of playing games. This time, we took our daughter along as well. 👶🏸

Honestly, I still don’t know whether it was the right decision or not! 😅 Half the time, one of us was busy handling the baby while the other was holding the pickleball paddle. It felt like we were playing doubles… with a toddler as our third teammate!

But you know what? It was totally worth it.

Because what our kids see today becomes their normal tomorrow. They are watching their parents stay active, enjoy sports, and have fun together. Hopefully, they’ll simply do a copy-paste of these habits as they grow up. 🤞

Talking about sports… Pickleball is surprisingly addictive!

Since my college days, I’ve been a die-hard fan of Rafael Nadal. 🎾 I tried playing tennis a few times, but “jama nahi” (it just didn’t work out). 😄

Pickleball isn’t exactly tennis, but it gives me a similar feeling. It’s easy to learn, super engaging, and before you realize it, two hours are gone!

After coming back home, we enjoyed an amazing Sunday lunch. 🍛

And then came the highlight…

My wife prepared the most delicious homemade Tiramisu for her YouTube channel.Click here to watch her amazing recipes.🍰 Trust me, it was absolutely amazing as I only finished 70% of it! The video should be out soon, so stay tuned.

After all that cooking, she was exhausted. She sat in the balcony with her phone, casually scrolling through YouTube.

After watching a few creators, she suddenly said,

“He mothe YouTubers ahet… te kiti successful ahet na? Itke followers ahet! Kiti mast life asel na? Kiti luxury cars pan ahet tyanchyakade.”

(These big YouTubers are so successful, aren’t they? They have so many followers! Their life must be amazing. And look at all those luxury cars they own.)

To be honest…

This wasn’t the first time she’d said something like this.

But this time was different.

At that exact moment, I was reading Focus on What Matters by Darius Foroux. 📖

And the chapter I was about to read… was talking about this exact mindset.

Sometimes life gives you such perfect timing that you just have to smile. 😊

I think after wanting to meet Icon Star Allu Arjun one day, I’ve now added Darius Foroux to my list too. 😄

Not only do I connect deeply with his writing style, but I also discovered that he has IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome), just like me.

Funny how you instantly feel connected to someone you’ve never met, simply because they understand a struggle you’ve lived with.

Anyway…

Let’s come back to that chapter and the discussion that followed…

The chapter started with a simple thought, but it hit me really hard.

Darius writes,

“We often look at one thing that someone has and assume their entire life must be so much better than ours.”

Isn’t that true? 🤔

We tell ourselves things like…

• If I had a bigger house, I’d be much happier.
• If I had a better car, I’d travel everywhere.
• If I had 1,00,000 followers, I’d post more content.

Sounds familiar, right?

But then he asks two questions that made me stop reading for a moment.

How do you know your life will be much better after getting those things?

Will your life really be that different once you have them?

Those two questions kept running in my mind.

When I looked back at my own life, I realized there were so many things that I once desperately wanted.

A better job. A higher salary.

A new gadget. A promotion.

Every single time I achieved one of those goals, I was genuinely happy. 😊

But if I’m being honest, that happiness lasted for a few minutes… maybe a few days… sometimes a few weeks.

Then life simply became normal again. The excitement slowly faded away.

Which made me wonder…

Do most materialistic things (भौतिक गोष्टी — material possessions) really give us long-term happiness? Or do they simply give us a temporary high?

Then Darius shared the lesson that, for me, became the highlight of the entire chapter.

He says that we spend so much time focusing on the rewards.

Money. Followers. Status. Recognition.

But we often forget the actions that actually create those rewards.

Mastering a skill at work. Building a business through years of effort. Practising for hours before publishing a single entertaining video. Writing consistently. Learning continuously.

Those are the real things that deserve our attention.

And then came my favourite line.

The real reward is not the money or the status. It’s the energy, pride, peace and sense of accomplishment you feel after doing meaningful work.

That sentence stayed with me long after I closed the book.

It reminded me of something very personal. I genuinely enjoy writing these blogs. ✍️

For one hour, I disconnect from the noise of the world.

“स्वतःसोबत थोडा वेळ घालवणं” (spending some quiet time with yourself) has become my favourite part of writing.

I don’t think about office work. I don’t think about pending tasks. I simply write whatever is going on in my mind. And when I finish writing, I feel peaceful.

Satisfied. Happy. No matter how simple the blog is.

But then… 😅

I open Medium. I check the number of views. I check the reads. I refresh the stats one more time.

And without realizing it, I ask myself the exact same question that my wife asked while scrolling through YouTube.

“What if I had more followers?”

Funny, isn’t it?

Sometimes the lesson we need to learn is the one we’re trying to teach ourselves.

So maybe the goal isn’t to stop dreaming about success.

Maybe the goal is to enjoy the process (प्रवास — the journey) so much that success becomes a bonus, not the reason we started.

If you made it till here, thank you for reading. ❤️

If this post reminded you of a similar moment in your own life, I’d love to hear about it.

Do leave a clap 👏 and share your thoughts in the comments.

Who knows… your perspective might become the inspiration for my next blog.