Beyond Marks: Fears We Never Talked About

I have seen many students from all strata, be it senior secondary, graduate or post graduate, there is one thing that brings them all under the same roof — the fear of failure.

The problem is not that the students are confused, but rather they are sought to have it all by the age of 18, which is quite challenging.

I was confused too and nobody talks about it. Why?

Because the standards set by the society is too harsh:

High class education by 22

Successful career by 28

Marriage by 30

But is that all simple?

They said its easy said than done, because nobody talks about the stress and the chaos that goes behind all of this.

Its like there is a imaginary path set up by someone which needs to be followed chronologically and we like the shepherd’s sheep follow it blindly without giving it a minute of thought.

I remember the day when my 12th results were out, and people around me were all exited to know what I would want to do in future. Like any other student, all I knew was I get to rest for a while now that i have finished my exams , but little did I know it was just the beginning of a never ending rat race.

I wanted to take up pure science, I loved chemistry and physics and I wanted to dwell deeper, there were few who wanted to pursue engineering and some medicine. I considered those weren’t my cup of tea.Slowly i started becoming prey to what’s called the controversial theory of “SCOPE” and “TRENDS”, which expressed how a student takes up a subject based on mere trends rather than their own choice of interest. I wanted to be devoid of all of it, but i was surrounded by people who would follow the herd and none wanted to be like “Macavity the rebel cat”.

But nature has its own way of twisting the story.

The chaos doesn’t end there, it has just began.

By the time you try to figure out what is happening to you, you are already stuck in the vicious cycle of expectations and proving your self worth.

Society portrays it quite well that a man who has it all sorted by the time he walks out of teenage will have a life of harmony and peace.

As soon as the caterpillar breaks out of the cocoon it has already paved its way towards the sky to become a beautiful butterfly but that’s not true when it comes to humans.

We are all creatures designed to grow by making mistakes and learning from the same. But the society tries to convey something totally different. From a very young age a child is taught that success is measured from outcomes such as their scores, scores and more scores

and low marks indicates failure.

Which is not true.

Efforts are to be valued more than results.

But the real question is: are we providing space for them to fail?

Is our educational system and its assessment criteria focused on efforts or results ?

To provide insight for the same, I have had many students who have tried giving up on the things they liked just because few numbers were not in their favor. Are we nurturing students to face the real world or creating lab rats in a dilusional castle?

When we look into it deeply, it is quite haunting. Are we sure that we are teaching our next generation in the right path?

When they come out of system such as this, the student is not prepared to face the external world.

All that he has gathered is fear.

No coping mechanism.

No clear judgement.

No resilience.

And now, all of sudden, he is expected to make a choice for something he would be responsible for another 30 years.

But are they really capable of deciding what they want to become ?

As a 17 year old, when my teacher asked my class what we wanted to pursue in future, there provided colorful answers coated with what looked like familial pressure, survival instincts, trending patterns.

But were they sure what they wanted become? the answer is clear NO.

The society deems a person capable of something merely based on their marks and not their skillset.

When I lookback at my class , the student who focused more on sports and had hardly any marks in mathematics and who had been shunned to have scored less is now an investment banker in London.

The question is: do marks define one’s destiny ?

The answer is NO.

But does that mean marks aren’t important criteria of judgment ?

No

They still mark as an important part of the rubrics but with the developments in the technology it calls for changes in the pattern of assessment.

Perhaps there is a need for deeper acceptance that things take time and its not right for anybody to question one person’s ability merely based on marks. Rather, if we create an environment where failures are not considered a taboo, but a bridge towards real growth, the world will be a better place to live in.