Defining anti-trans harassment

Photo by Yan Krukau: https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-woman-covering-her-ears-7640490/

Every time I post any trans related content on social media I invariably receive comments from gender critics stating that it is in fact trans women who are the instruments of their own oppression, and that gender critics have every right to deny trans womanhood based on their own personal philosophical beliefs. Trans people are all too familiar with these refrains, indeed it is a primary reason why many trans people refuse to engage with social media beyond a select few platforms. Defining that harassment, and showing it to the world is important because it demonstrates the uphill struggle trans people and their allies face in trying to shape a trans inclusive pluralistic society.

Let’s start with the obvious. Gender critics claim protection for their harassment because they believe that sex ought to be defined by chromosomes and described sex at birth irrespective of how a person understands themselves to be. This is a typical gender critical comment I receive dehumanising me simply based on my looks:

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I believe this is a clear case of harassment, especially when it is used as an excuse to delegitimise the points I was making. In this case it was a discussion over an article I wrote about fascism, and Bob decided to scrape an image of me from a video and post it to discredit me. This is both misogynistic and transphobic, yet gender critics feel empowered because platforms such as X refuse to acknowledge this as anything other than free speech.

Then you have the anonymous accounts who spam harassment on any trans related posts. This was posted below an article I wrote outlining how a new UK law protected trans people from sexual harassment. The anonymous user felt empowered to threaten all trans people with physical abuse simply for existing as themselves in society. While I do not feel unsafe in public, it is these types of comments which reinforce trans people’s perception that society is hostile to their very existence.

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Then you have the anonymous gender critical abuse that rehashes gender critical stereotypes and dog whistles. It is impossible to describe what it is like being called a sexual predator in waiting simply for existing as yourself. This is the most prevalent sort of online abuse I receive, reducing me down to a punchbag simply because I reject the notion that a woman ought to be defined by her reproductive potential. Noting that the last comment ticks three gender critical low notes, dehumanising me from behind an anonymous account with no scrutiny or accountability.

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Finally, you have the comments which hit all of these notes and more. This type of harassment explicitly seeks to validate the commenter by tearing me down, granting them a sliver of power over me simply because they feel emboldened to punch down. I am old enough and long enough in the tooth to understand that this type of person is desperate for personal validation from anyone who dislikes trans people, so I try not to let it get personal. Yet, it is telling that this person is also trans, so what is going through their mind when they post comments like this other that a desperate desire for the wrong type of validation.

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I could go on. Every trans person has their own stories of harassment and abuse, and while it is tempting to say I am an outlier, the tragedy is that every trans person I know who has any public profile suffers the same. Bullies and those who harass seek to steal something from you for their own personal gratification, meaning that their search for victims always alights on those they think will not react. This is why harassment is classified as a crime, and why the law seeks to punish those who abuse others. Yet, as many trans people will tell you there is no way to punish those who post from anonymous accounts or through bots because the police rarely have the resources to handle such claims.

Using my own examples is my attempt at deconstructing the abuse I receive. Having alopecia and not wearing make-up opens me up to a world of misogynistic abuse I never thought possible, so adding transphobic abuse into the mix makes me do a lot of soul searching. Those who choose to harass rarely consider the impact their actions have on their victims, indeed the only point of their actions is self-gratification. If you need to get your dopamine hint from abusing others then you lead a sad life indeed. As with all abuse the abuser requires escalation in order to feel the same high because the first level of abuse quickly runs out of producing the same level of pleasure for them. This is why gender critics start small and quickly escalate into more extreme forms of abuse, then fold in other abusive language including racism and anti-sex work rhetoric.

There is only so much you can take as a victim before you start to internalise it. Shutting off all social media is not possible if you want to connect with the world, especially if you want to research ways to overcome the abuse trans people suffer from. I was asked in 2025 if my continued use of platforms like X was a form of self-harm, and in a way it probably is. However, my intention with engaging with the world through my writing is not about attracting abuse, it is about deconstructing that abuse and building a more pluralistic society. I cannot do that curled up on my bed scared to move, I need to engage, learn, and confront the abuse to stop it making me feel unhuman.

As a woman I constantly have to prove myself to strangers, with my credentials questioned even when I am simply using my professional expertise to plainly explain something. Male gender critics are fond of denying my qualifications, to the point where I had a male law undergraduate brag about his law degree without realising my personal qualifications. Two other people in the space of an hour asked me for my qualifications, both of whom were trans, and it felt like they were retreading the same ground the gender critic was. I am not in the habit of bragging about my qualifications or experience because my work should speak for itself, yet people clearly feel entitled to tear a small piece of me off simply to buttress their own assumptions.

It is the debasement of my identity which has forced me to confront personal truths about myself. I am not a woman who needs validation from my looks, rather I expect others to restrain themselves from hurling abuse at me. I am also someone who fundamentally does not understand why others would seek to deny me my identity simply based on their own beliefs. I am highly qualified, have a lot of life experience, and have been a woman my entire adult life. I have nothing to prove, yet gender critics continually force me to question and prove myself. This is why gender critical harassment hurts at a fundamental level because it evokes deep self-reflection in me when none was needed or warranted.

The sad thing is that there is nothing new to the harassment trans people face. Every minority group faces the same pressure to conform in the face of constant harassment. Abusers will seek to bolster their own power because they believe that it is a zero sum game. No matter who you are as a person if someone has it in their mind that abusing you will give them even a small uplift in their own status and power they will take it.

What hurts is that I am happy to share my everything with anyone if they ask. My time, money, energy and effort are freely given. You do not need to tear me down, abuse, or harass me for me to give freely to you. Having my identity, expertise, and credentials perpetually questioned is like being put into the crucible every time I engage, a constant trial by fire which hardens a part of me which I really wish has not been. This is the impact harassment has on me, the empathic and open side which genuinely wants to have reciprocity rather than abuse, harassment, or constant undermining.

Gender critics will come back and say that I will never be the person I claim to be because of biology or social experiences, yet it is not for me to prove anything, I simply just am. Like any other trans person. Harassing trans people does not change that, nor does it lead to anything other than pain, suffering, and loss of faith in the societies we exist in. Our quantum of suffering is built on the foundations gender critics had laid out, their harassment building blocks upon which they seek to set themselves over every trans person. No trans person seeks to dominate any other person, simply wanting to exist as their affirmed selves and get on with life.

Defining anti-trans harassment comes down to this: gender critics use harassment, bullying, and dehumanising rhetoric to claw back a sliver of personal power for themselves at the expense of the trans people they harass. Their victims are simply collateral damage, and once one victims exists stage left they will jump onto the next one and the next until either they are exhausted, banned, or lose interest. Along the way they inflict untold suffering and misery without caring to understand why. This is why I try to call it out first time, every time, yet that gets exhausting because you cannot play whack-a-mole all day every day.

Many trans people will feel I am speaking the obvious here, yet it bears repeating because it needs to be said until people understand the intrinsic harm gender critical abuse has on trans people. We are a small minority who face increasing harassment, dehumanising, and abuse simply for existing as ourselves. I am very fortunate to have a supportive friend and family network, yet there is much I cannot discuss with them because of the degrading nature of the abuse I receive. I showed a handful of screenshots to an acquaintance and they were horrified, and contextually discussed some of the abuse in an interview and the interviewer as shocked. This level of abuse and harassment is not normal, and any cis person on the receiving end of it would have the same visceral reaction I do. Yet, society have seemingly normalised online transphobic harassment because it de facto accepts that trans people are worthy of such abuse as long as it is out of sight and out of mind.

I am emotional writing this because talking about the abuse I receive is hard. On the one hand I ignore the vast majority of it and try not to engage, yet the abuse has had a profound impact on my willingness to post images of myself outside of very controlled environments. Gender critical harassment has reshaped my conception of self in a negative way, and the constant reporting of my images to shape me as a monster and predator are soul destroying. How are you supposed to cope when the very thing that makes you who you are is weaponised against you. That is a question I confront daily, and one which forces me to write, advocate, and push back against the vitriol and harassment all trans people face.

In the end it will take platform reforms to push back against the abuse trans people suffer. It requires courts and police to rehumanise trans people and see the abuse we suffer as systemic and structural. Gender critics have co-opted normative society to deny trans people basic rights in part based on the harassment they have generated online. For all the harassment and abuse I receive this is what keeps me in the fight, that my skills, expertise, and training can aid in whatever way I can in pushing back, while in turn giving every trans person who comes after me a better and more fulfilled life. I plant the tree, let them have the shade.