Protecting Your Peace & Boundaries

Boundaries & peace is something to be protected-no matter what

Photo by Deniz Altindas on Unsplash

A toxic system thrives by insults, taunts and a circle of unappreciated work ethic. You come in and give in 100%, giving 100% mean you give extra time & energy in response for a positive outlook, only to receive negative or less than average rating at the end.

Now, this is toxic, where you exist in a system where your senior is constantly judging you negatively, you give in your best and receive less than a positive response and when you go the extra mile, you are responded with how you took the wrong mile.

A place where you are constantly reminded about how you are not doing a “favor” with your work or how “replaceable” you are in the end.

It can be a home, a school, a class or a workplace. Toxicity drains you and makes you dislike all the activities you liked and enjoyed.

There are of course certain situations where you don’t have an option or where you can’t escape.

A kid living with a single toxic parent, a class required for passing which has a teacher who has made you a “target” or even going to work for a place you can’t stand simply because your survival depends on it.

That’s where boundaries come in, that’s where space comes in and that’s where the need for intervention come in and you are faced with a few harsh realities: Your mental health SHOULD NOT be comprised.

Realizing this, you search for backup plans, breathers, comfort and of course, temporary peace.

A song you love which makes you forget everything you dislike.

A phone call with someone who you cherish.

A visit to a place which connects with your soul.

Eating comfort food or even junk food for temporary relief.

But here’s the thing: you don’t WANT to have the call or want to listen to the song or visit any place; but it's just that sometimes, certain habits, visits & hobbies help us forget the unbearable, the unwanted & negative opinions & setbacks. The ones we never liked but we are forced to face.

Photo by Colton Duke on Unsplash

Maybe if we don’t have these breathers, we will go mad. We will go mad & lose control. We will forget what peace & happiness felt like and drown in something called the clutches of toxicity, clutching us deep into the darkness.

Younger me was not able to recognize how certain people, certain classes, certain teachers & certain situations were toxic for me, horribly toxic. I was unable to recognize them and hence kept being attacked by them, to the point that I had to realize & stop the interaction all together.

Anything or any interaction which ends up making you feel LESS than you should, one way or the other or makes you feel overwhelmed to some extent means it is toxic, it is draining you and you don’t need it. You don’t need validation or opinions of others. You should have choices.

Multiple choices.

Many doors.

Degrees. Skills.

To support yourself and your peace.

The courage to look at people in the eye and tell them how you can and you will walk away and let them face the music. Their own destruction created by themselves.