Well, color me embarrassed.

Suva, Fiji, mid-80's.

Flag of Fiji

My icebreaker, the USCGC Polar Star (WAGB-10), had just pulled in to port in Suva, on the island of Viti Levu in Fiji.

It was a beautiful Austral summer day, and we were welcoming visitors from the local community aboard for tours of the cutter. Many of these visitors were local dignitaries and politicians.

I was on duty, standing watch on the Quarterdeck, welcoming everyone aboard the ship. Most of the people were speaking perfect English (naturally enough, since Fiji was a British Crown Colony and is a member of the Commonwealth) and I’m enjoying answering questions about the United States, the Coast Guard, Antarctica, and the Polar Star; and also asking them about Fiji. It’s important to remember that I have serious social issues, and it’s difficult for me to interact with people face-to-face, but in this instance, I was having a good time.

Suva City and Walu Bay

Suddenly, with the Quarterdeck — and the rest of the ship — packed with excited English speaking visitors, the Executive Officer comes over the 1MC (think of a public address system broadcast throughout the entire ship, interior and exterior) advising us all to be careful and use condoms, because 70%* of the adult population has sexually transmitted diseases. I almost died of embarrassment.

* 70% isn’t the precise percentage given, but it was in that general area.